I was diagnosed with ER and PR +ve breast cancer last year. Lumpectomy and radiation and tamoxifen followed. I thought I was doing okay, but the last couple of weeks have been hard.
I have had genetic testing and no genes were identified but because of family history, I am at a higher risk of developing ovarian cancer. Then the tamoxifen increases that risk. A few weeks ago my period returned and was really heavy then I had break through bleeding. Cue a scan this week. Although I thought the radiologist wouldnt say anything, I think it was obvious she had found something and she told me i had two cysts, one simple and one hemorrhagic.
I have to wait until Monday to go through the radiologist report.
I know that tamoxifen increases the risk of cysts and that they are unlikely to be cancerous. But I just feel so exhausted and stressed and tired of being scared all the time. I feel like its going to be hard to get through the weekend until I know what the report actually says and what the plan is. I know I’m going to be short tempered with my young children which isn’t fair on them.
My closest friends all have their own things going on atm and I don’t want to put more on them.
So any tips for controlling my anxiety and getting through the weekend?
When I was waiting for results I used to view the weekend as a break from cancer - nothing happens at the weekend as a rule. No letters phone calls appointments - nothing’s going to change . I don’t have kids and I’m older than you but I would take myself off for the day or try to spend as much time as I could with my friends or family ( I have a partner but he works every weekend) . I can’t say that it was totally successful but the stress level did fall and I had some nice experiences and have some good memories . Just wondering if there’s anything nice you could do as a family this weekend and just try to be in the moment - take a little break from cancer world for a day or even an afternoon. You may think I’m completely mad but it did help . Xx
Hello waitingwaiting !
Im so sorry, you have to tackle so many things, worries and fears all at the same time ! Apologies for commenting on this, but even if a absolut understand it but im a little taken aback by, that no one of your friends can reach out… not even over an online chat ? That is really sad. I hope they may will change that and can/ will be there in future, if you really in the dumps and could do with someone there supporting you !! But great, that you done this shout out on here…
It must be such a minefield with all the different treatments and meds… one thjng is good and necessary for one thing but bad for another, or like in your case increase the risk of developing cysts. Not an addition you need right now on top of anything else ongoing. I can relate to two things here. The cysts but also the genetic test and the unfortunate history of cancer in the family. In 2011 i had a very large tumor/cyst on my right overy+ the overy itself removed. The test results came back as borderline. I was lucky enough to never developing cancer. ( also had a keyhole op removing some smaller cysts before my daughter was born. Now…only two weeks ago my 28 year old daughter was diagnosed with grade3 breast cancer and yesterday she had also her CT scan result , which came back as TNBC. As wehave on my fathers side loads of various cancer ( my fathers mum past away with 36 on breast cancer and so did her 3 sisters) and so like you is going to have this gene test and depending on the result my son ( her brother) and i will have it done also. So i fully feel for you ! It is the unknown… the often too long wait, where the mind can take over and properly get nasty with all kind of overwhelming thoughts… fear and simply feeling so damn allone. I did mentioned this to another lady on here- and is simply a suggestion… i find the sea, a woodland or the countryside very soothing…to just sit, walk or stroll… breathing in deely the scent of nature… breathing out all the negative…all the tension inside you…may even scream the whole lot out… do whatever you feel your body and mind wants/ needs you to do… clear your head… may just sit and listen close your eyes and just breathe. Im not sure if you are in to any of this at all but light meditations can do wonders…anything positive, what will distract your mind… it is also calming and soothing. May listening to some relaxing music … online are soooo many different types of musig or soundbaths…you mentioned that you have little kids… these things would be nice to do when they are tucked up in bed and you can focus on yourself… may even a bedtime story out to them… would be nice to share with your kids and may also calm you a little… one last thing… if you ever want to write, rant, chat or simple reach out to not be allone, then please do reach out !
I hope, that you find a little inner peace and will manage to calm a bit… get through this weekend not being allone with all this… stay srtong… and find some inner calm … sending a long cyber HUG over to you… all the best
T
I’m so sorry you are going through such an anxious time. For sure the waiting time is always the worst. When i was in that phase i used to distract myself with walking or getting into an absorbing movie or book. A bit different if you have kids, I know, but perhaps packing up a picnic and going to a beach or park/countryside would be a distraction. Being occupied makes time go faster.
We all spend a lot of time worrying about what might be, rather than focusing on what is actually known at present. Remember, the majority of ovarian cysts are not cancerous, so keep steering your mind away from the worst case scenario.
Do let us know how things turn out
Sending hugs and love
Eily xxxxx