My name is Kat and I was diagnosed with DCIS on the 13th June (somehow this would sound better if I said…I am an alcoholic- lol!). I had surgery on the 6th July- wide excision and reconstruction of left breast and reduction of the right breast (I was a 34 JJ and now have pert, lifted 34D’s- so pleased with that).Due to my ample pre- surgery breast size, I did not require a mastectomy but I have had my nipple and areola removed as the cells were near to the skin surface behind the nipple. However, I get my results and treatment plan tomorrow and have to confess that although I appear to be calm and taken this all so well (so I am constantly being told), inwardly, I am begining to panic and have loads of ‘what if’ scenarios buzzing around my head. My latest is brain mets due to being very unwell the last 3 days with sharp pains in the head, nausea etc (GP has sorted this one out for me now).
Can anyone tell me when the tears are going to flow? I know that everyone is different and I have had a few tears but nothing substantial. I feel that I am carrying my family/ friends and can’t cry, grieve etc because I haven’t had time to- does this make sense to anyone?
Since my diagnosis with Grade II Invasive Ductal Carcinoma on 1st June, I have hardly cried at all. I don’t know why this is, perhaps a determination to not let this beat me, not give in to it and give it the satisfaction of it upsetting me, or just being brave for everyone else. I really don’t know. I cried the whole night last week when my hair came out though, so I don’t know what that says about me? Vain? I hope not, I never thoughts so! I find reading the messages on this board make me tearful at times, but never a full on sob!
If it happens though I’ll welcome it, in fact writing this now to you is making me a bit tearful!
We all deal with it in our own way so see what happens.
I had a WLE and full lymph removal in March and I’m 3/4 through my chemo.During this time I’ve not cried - not like me at all and I don’t know why - think it could be that if I start I may not stop. I do cry reading other peoples posts and what they are going through but seem to think that mine is unreal!!! I go to a support group weekly and find this site brill. I have spoken to a councerlor and told her I don’t need councilling at the moment but i know its there should I need it.There are no hard and fast rules - cry when you want,smile when you want but most of all make each day count
I had a Mastectomy on 16th May this year. I’m a physio so I made sure I was up and out of bed quickly, with full range of movement in my arm, as soon as possible. Everyone said how well I looked, so I got back to the ‘normal routine’ jobs, of everyday life.
About 4 weeks later, I felt my body had more or less recovered from the operation but all of a sudden my emotions caught up with me and I had the first panic attack I had ever had in my life. I was getting ‘better’ so why did I still feel so awful in myself, I cryed the whole day, I was convinced I had lung cancer!! even though the sensible bit of my brain was telling me not to be silly. I felt so horrible I was so scared of ‘loosing it’ that I phoned the good ladies here on the help line. They reassured me about my fears, and told me I wasn’t being silly. Talking helped me realise I was protecting all the people around me because they wanted me to get better quickly.
I was hiding my true feelings from the Kids, so they didn’t get scared. Protecting my mum because she is frail and needs help herself, trying to be strong for my husband, and he was trying to be strong for me, which just led to a breakdown in communication generally and a feeling of isolation on my part.
The good news is I do feel much better. Life will never be the same, but it gets a bit more normal everyday.
I hope this experience helps, I suppose I’m saying we have all been through a lot, we are human not superwomen. Just be kind to yourself.
Good luck with your results
You will feel better soon
Helfire
Thank you all for your replies. You are right, we are human not superwoman (although I am sure the husband wouldn’t mind seeing me in her outfit). Emotions are unique but I know that the floodgates will open soon- I cry at the most stupid things- anyone remember Little house on the prairie?!
Got my results today. All DCIS gone, no invasive cells. Therefore, I will be starting radiotherapy in August and will be followed up in the clinic every 3- 6 months for the next 10 years!! (until I reach 50 and go onto the national screening programme).
Feel very relieved. Definately having some wine tonight.
Sending positive thoughts and best wishes to you all,
Just to let you know that I had a very similar op to you in November 2005. The enormity of it all does take a long time to sink in. Thank goodness there are those to whom we can ‘speak’, for only they can understand.
I feel so much more optimistic about the future now, though suspect the fear will never truly go away.
I have seen the Consultant Radiologist this morning. I am having the radiotherapy because I am 39 (40 next week!) and had high grade DCIS. Because of this, I scored high on a scale they use (can’t remember the name but I have read about it on the web). I will have 5 weeks of radiotherapy but not a booster dose as 1/3 of the breast, areola and nipple was removed so there is nowhere to administer the boost too. I was told that if I had had a mastectomy then I would not have needed radiotherapy, so the information seems to be consistant.
A friend of mine had LCIS (lumpectomy, some glands removed but no spread) and she is having radiotherapy and tamoxifen- I’m not having that. It appears that all hospitals work differently where tamoxifen is concerned. I will be followed up every 3/6/12 months until I am 50 and can go on the national screening programme.
It doesn’t seem fair that you have to make this decision. I think that if I was in your situation, I would not be comfortable making that decision.
I was diagnosed with DCIS after a routine mammogram showed calcifications.
After two core biopsies I was told that it was contained in the milk duct and I was given the choice of a Lumpectomy also called a wide local excision.or a mastectomy.
I ended up having the WLE.
I had the operation on 2nd July ,had very little pain and went home the next day.
The surgeon said they had removed all the DCIS with a good clear margin around it so I would not need Radiotherapy.
Apart from regular check ups and yearly mammograms I do not need any further treatment.
I was very scared at first.but as time goes by you do begin to accept it,the waiting for results is the worst bit,once you know what you are dealing with and you get a treatment plan you will feel more positive.
I hope things turn out well for you,remember we are all here for you,we have all been through but you are going through now,you will never be alone.
I have already been told a the breast care unit where I had my steriotactic biopsy that the only way forward was a masectomy today is the day to see the surgeon and get the full story, but I have been told that because I have several personal tings to sort out such as a holiday booked for the end of August and a daughter changing schools at the beginning of september she will be going to the big school. Also I have central heating going in as well as new windows. So hopefully I can have the op at the beginning of October.
Feeling a little more positive now I wrapped my head round the inevitable and have sort of set a time for the op
Sweetheart