Hiya
I know that in the scheme of things my query is really not very important at all but I’ve been invited to attend the first round of interviews this coming Monday for a job that is much closer to home (I commute to London from the midlands every day - or at least I did before I went on sick leave) and I’m in two minds as to how to approach it - to wear my wig or to wear a headscarf. I intend to tell them at the interview that I am currently undergoing chemotherapy but if I wear a headscarf they will know immediately that something is not quite right. On the other hand, I’m not sure how confident I would be sitting in front of an interview panel wearing a wig that irritates me at the best of time and which I am petrified will slip!
The other alternative, of course, is to go ‘naked’ but I only really feel comfortable doing that in the privacy of my own home.
After everything that has happened in the last few months, I really shouldn’t be getting so worked up about a job interview but any advice you could give would be very much appreciated.
Naz
Hi Naz
If it were me, I would wear what I felt comfortable in which from what you said, is your headscarf. You are going to tell them anyway so they will soon know. If you do get the job, what would you wear to work on a day to day basis?
All the very best for the interview. I commute from the south midlands to Birmingham every day and it is no joke when you are feeling good, never mind going through this. Being close to home will be much nicer for you.
Cathy
xxx
Thanks, Cathy - yes, would definitely feel more comfortable in the headscarf - and you’re right I intend to tell them anyway. It would be a test for them too - I might even feel that we were equals on the day then!
Yes, the commuting is not good - I have looked at jobs in Birmingham but although the cost is significantly lower than to London it takes just about the same in time and I want to be doing a job that is relatively speaking just around the corner. Are you working through your treatment - I take my hat off to you.
Naz
Hi Naz
Yes, I think if you wore a wig and felt uncomfortable, they would notice and you would think that were looking at your wig slipping, even if it wasn’t and put you right off!!! No, I am off work. I work in healthcare treating people who have all sorts of infections etc, so wouldnt be good to be around them. My boss has been brilliant and told me doesnt want to see me until I feel absolutely fine (that could be years yet!). Where do you live? I am hoping once every settles to move closer to Birmingham, maybe Rugby.
Yeah, you’re right - my sister was of the view that I should wear the wig - as no-one else but my family and friends will know that its a wig - but my partner is of the view that I should wear the headscarf instead - and I tend to agree. But to be honest, I’d rather not have to go for the interview at all in the first place - I’m nervous at the best of times but not having worked for the last 3 months - as well as the effect the chemo is having on my mind - I’m not sure just how capable I will be in stringing any sentence together let alone one about work!
Definitely not a good idea to be at work for you then. I’m signed off for the next few months too - I could work from home - and may well do in time - but I just didn’t want to be beholden to deadlines etc when I wouldn’t know how I would be feeling from one day to the next. It is good that our bosses have been so understanding!
I live in Rugby myself - I did wonder where South Midlands was and thought perhaps you might live in Warwickshire?
hi Naz
I live in south northamptonshire, near Banbury. I have been to Rugby a few times and think its a lovely town. You seem to have everything going for you there - near to bigger cities yet lots of lovely countryside. I have had a quick look at property on the web but havent a clue which areas are the best - I would want to be near to the station so I could walk or get a bus. At the moment, I have to drive 10 miles to station. Why are you going for the interview if youre not ready to work yet? Is it just to get things in place for when you are ready?
Good luck anyway
Cathy
Yes, Rugby is not bad but I have to say I’d rather live closer to the coast. But then I’d rather have a house in the country, a house by the sea, a flat in London - and the same again in my favorite European country - only I can’t decide which is my favorite European country - so I’d have to have a place in Italy, Greece…!!!
I have to drive to the station too - I live about 3 miles outside of Rugby town centre - and its really frustrating - but there are some lovely places to live in Rugby within walking distance of the station - I’m afraid I can’t give you the names of areas as I haven’t lived up here very long myself. It just adds more time to your working day, doesn’t it, when you have to drive to the station first before you even catch the train!
Unfortunately, I think perhaps the job may have come at the wrong time for me - but I’m going for the interview and will take it one step at the time - I’d have to convince them that I’m capable of doing the job first - and, sad, as it might seem, my sister seems to think its a good idea for me to go for the interview anyway just to get me out of the house! I have become a bit of a recleuse of late, so she’s probably right. Mind you, what its going to do to my confidence when I screw the interview up is something else altogether.
Desperately trying to avoid the last few months becoming the only life I have ever known.
x
Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have enough money to buy several houses all over the world. I really would fancy a city apartment too in London, overlooking Regent’s park and a beach house somewhere exotic and then several places around Europe. Oh well. I think going for an interview to get out of the house is a bit scary!!! I hate them at the best of times, seems a lot of hassle to put yourself through? Your sister knows you and is acting in your best interests. I think being a recluse is part of the package. It does drain you of energy - I feel horrible and i haven’t even had chemo so it must be dreadful for you. I think we have to accept that we are not normal at the moment but will be one day - be kind to yourself!
Cathy
xx
WOW… go for it! Really impressed.
Best of luck for Monday! if scarf is more comfy - wear it. BCN caroline saw me for first time in wig today and did a double take - saying - i thought you had lost your hair - i whipped it off and said yes…
the hamster does itch like crazy and nah - don’t think i could sit in an interview with it on and concentrate.
soz cathy - we are entirely normal - just happen to have cancer, still normal i’d love a place in merioneth, kefalonia, lake garda and …
hugs to all
Jennifer x
btw… Cathy - i have lived in Rugby for 10 years. i live in north rugby - brownsover - the bit i live in is 1970s estate and prices are lower than the newer bits around here with prettier looking houses. depends what u have to spend - but i live in 4 bed link detached, good sized rooms and it wd prob sell for £185 -90k. the newer houses look better but have smaller rooms.
round the station loads of smallish terraced houses.
within walkign distance… to die for bigger victorian/edwardian terraces/semis/detached along clifton road (i want one!) and by bus route… look at Bilton area - there is a bus from there to station and up to where i live
I was speaking for myself Jen, about being normal!!! I have never been normal anyway, so this is just a different kind of abnormal for me!!! I had to ask my son was “soz” was - how sad is that!!! Thanks for the info on houses in rugby. I love the town so watch this space.
Cathy
xxxxx
laughing - me neither… about normal!!! my sons 19 and 21 say i am odd but wd rather have me as mum than some of the others they meet. umm i now cackiling
best of luck for tomoz Naz
Jen
XX
Hi Naz
I went for an interview after my 3rd FEC day 6, wanted the job & talked to care nurse about it, she was very supportive and friends were too. I wore my wig - only that time - it was hot but tried to ignore that as didnt want to wear a scarf or go nautral - i have 5mm of thin hair all over, not changed since chemo 2.
I had tried the wig with family and they thought it great.
I work in the voluntary sector so may be slightly different but with policy of ‘equal opprotunities’ was advised not to say anything about chemo - they didnt ask about health in the application form or in the interview so I didnt raise it.
2 out of 3 interviewers ‘knew’ I was on chemo but didnt raise it - they offered me the job !!! they wanted a statement of health and took me on after I had written how i felt during cycles generally & having time off in 1st week of chemo, an op & recovery & radiotherapy etc. My official hours are 25 per week but have told them can only work 2-3 hrs max each day or 4 if I can! They want me and are able to work round my health
it did take me 2 days to recover from the exhaustion of the interview and i was slower in answering than usual but they were kind & patient with me - think they wanted me before interview with the skills i have…
thinking of you tomorrow
hugs Jan
good luck Naz, Baggsy me having the house on clifton RD first ive been in one and they are absolutely gorgeous, im also going to have a city pad in london, a villa in portugal, beach pad on the coast in australia, and one or two other properties, maybe a mansion in the cotswolds, which one of you lot wants to come and be my cleaner?
ANNA x x x x
oy anna - i think i have first dibs on clifton road!! i’d be a rubbish cleaner!!!