Jokes to share

Just thought I’d share a couple of jokes with you’s

Every Christmas I get a horrendous pain that stays for a week. Then my mother-in-law goes back to her own house.

Father: Did you see Father Christmas this year, son?
Son: No it was too dark to see him, but I heard what he said when he stubbed his toes on the edge of my bed.

Joe: Did you get many Christmas presents?
Jack: I sure did. A lot more than my four brothers.
Joe: Why was that?
Jack: On Christmas morning I got up two hours before them

Santa Claus brings poor Rudolph to the vet. He says to the vet, “Doctor, please do something for my Rudolph. His nose won’t light up.” The vet walks out of the room and returns with a pet carrier. He places the pet carrier next to the reindeer, opens it and out steps a cat. The cat walks around the reindeer and sniffs it. The cat then walks back into the carrier. The animal doctor takes it out of the room and returns. He hands Santa Claus the bill. Santa gasps, £350! You didn’t do anything for my Rudolph and you’re charging me £350 ?" The vet shrugged and replied, “That’s the usual charge. £50 for the office visit and £300 for the CAT SCAN.”

Doctor, doctor, I keep seeing into the future.
When did this first happen?
Next Tuesday.

“Doctor, doctor, every time I drink a cup of coffee I get a sharp pain in my nose.”
“Have you tried taking the spoon out of the cup?”


I liked the one re the CAT Scan Carol, xx

Thanks for the Doctor jokes, I will try them on my GP!!