I have just been diagnosed with breast cancer Friday. My whole world has fallen apart and it’s not quite registered yet I’m still in denial
I had lymph nodes removed 4 weeks ago after an awful painful year. And shocked to learn I have cancer taken them over a year to figure it out I have to have another op. Chemo etc but have to have a pet scan and gas mammogram yesterday. Then in January they will give me the grade and stage ( not that I have a clue what it is even ).
Any advice for me would be helpful. I know I’ll loose all my long hair. I feel helpless. Sad. and if anyone is in Scunthorpe perhaps we could meet up etc. X
we all know here what that feels like to be told you have cancer… understand the denial, shock, horror, fear of the unknown and the " what if "… etc…
we have all fought through the surgery, the radiotherapy, the chemotherapy, the total hair loss and of course the dreaded side effects ??
Once you know what ur dealing with, the type of BC ( i was Triple Negative ) the stage and grade, then ur treatment plan you can face it head on.
Believe me it does get easier once you have started.
There are so many lovely ladies on here that can offer, advice, support and BIG HUGS ?
my final chemo was back in August, i was terrified but got through those 3 months of treatment, came out the otherside and rang that bell.
if i can help at all in any way or even just talk, message me anytime.
I want to back what mini mad has said. You’ve come to the right place. We’ve all faced that same devastation when your mind runs wild and imagines all the worst possible scenarios. But it will get easier and in fact your world hasn’t fallen apart - you’ve lost your sense of personal safety which is a huge blow.
Once your treatment plan is in place and started, your perspective will change and you’ll focus on getting through it, with all the practicalities that involves. Speaking from my own experience, I stayed in ‘denial.’ I didn’t deny for a moment I had breast cancer or that it has spread to my lymph nodes. I just decided there was nothing I could do about it so, rather than get more upset and worried, I’d just hand myself over to the team and go with the flow. I had no idea what my diagnosis meant, my tumour sizes, margins, grades etc and I asked no questions about it. (I’ve only just asked the important questions, 5 months after finishing the main treatments). It worked for me. However, a lot of patients feel more in control knowing all the details.
You do what’s best for you but please don’t turn to Dr Google for any answers. Google is not your friend right now. It can’t take your individual circumstances into consideration, has no respect for your emotions and is often either out of date or way beyond the comprehension of an untrained mind. I know that from personal experience when I googled something a few months back and really wish I hadn’t! As my b-c nurse said “What’s been read can’t be unread.” There are nurses to speak to here, you will have your own breast-care nurse at your hospital and and adjuvant oncology nurse during chemo. You also have us, though most of us can only go by our experience, not scientific research.
In January, take a trusted friend with you, someone who won’t get upset alongside you but will be able to take notes for you (very little goes in when you’re anxious) and maybe has a list of the questions you want to ask. I called my friend my favourite PA and couldn’t have done without her.
I hope the news is reassuring. January seems a long way off and of course you have the festive period to get through. I was fortunate to be in a position to be able to cancel last Christmas as I really didn’t want to see people. It’s important to make your choices for your benefit, not do what others think you should be doing. This is a tough time with a lot of processing to do and you have to learn to put yourself first, to some extent.