just been told have cancer


I am 47 and last wednesday was told i had stage 3 breast cancer with my lymph nodes cancerous as well.  i have a ct scan tomorrow, my tumour is quite big and has been there for a while so iam really scared it has spread what happens next ? I have not got a clue and am worried it could be stage 4

Hi Ria


Sorry you’ve joined us. I think they will have said grade 3, rather than stage - I know it’s all a bit confusing initially.  I was diagnosed at 46 with a grade 3 tumour which was 2.5 cm plus satellite tumours, affected lymph nodes plus a few other issues. I wasalso  told that I will have had the cancer for a few years before I found it.


Once you’ve had the CT scan your team can assess what to do next. If it’s a large tumour I think they may possibly offer chemo first to shrink it before surgery to remove it. I had surgery first and they sent the tumour off to pathology who produced a histology report of it’s characteristics (if that’s the correct terminology). I was then called in a couple of weeks later so they could discuss the results with me and I was referred to the oncologist who wrote a report about what they considered should be the course of treatment following surgery. They can advise you what percentage benefit things like chemo would offer you. For me, chemo and radiotherapy were estimated to improve my chances by 20% so it was a bit of a no-brainer for me to take anything they could offer.


I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow. Hopefully they can give you the results of that fairly soon to ease that worry, although when we’re on the receiving end of results a couple of weeks feels endless.


Best wishes.


Hi Ria

I am so sorry to hear of your diagnosis.


I can only say it feels like you are in the depth of despair at the moment …but it does ease… the fear subsides once you have your treatment plan and you begin your journey to your cure


Please do not read and google.…it is the worse thing you can do because your journey is yours…your team will tell you all you need to know and on here we will support you with our expereince and help you through this nightmare.Everyone’s treatment is different…but on here we will all have been through some of it


Your mind will torture you far more than any of the treatemnt… don’t be afraid of the treatment…it is not painful…and any side effects you may expereince (although you may have none) will be managed immediately.


You may have chemo to shrink your tumour before surgery…or after…depends on your oncologist… but it is all manageable…


I know it is hard right now…and you will want to curl up in bed and close out the world…but you will get through this…one day at a time


Allow yourself time…and accept that you will cry and be scared… but eventually you will be able to focus and you will get through this…as we all …one day at a time


Sending you warmest wishes and fingers crossed for some good news  xxx Donna



Hi ria2056

Welcome to the BCC forums, I am sure the support here will help and please also feel free to call our helpliners on 0808 800 6000, lines are open weekdays 9-5 and Saturdays 10-2 for further practical and emotional support

Here’s a link to the BCC ‘Just diagnosed’ area of the site where you will find lots more support ideas and information:


Take care
Lucy BCC

Hi ria2056 welcome.


I know you are feeling so much stress just now it’s unbearable.  this is completely understandable.


if you have any specific questions write them down. When you walk into that room everything will completely leave your mind. Ask the person going with you to take notes. You will forget a lot that you are told or only remember some of it later.


once you get your details and treatment plan your mind settles down a little because you have something to focus on. But really it’s one step at a time. One treatment at a time. 


as Donna has said it’s not as bad as you imagine it’s going to be and any problems there is something to help.


you can do this. One step at a time


Fingers crossed for today.


take care