Hi KC’s Gran
I agree with Tors, that I think it is probably too overwhelming for your sister and therefore if she doesn’t have to hear about it, then it isn’t ‘real’. People react in very different ways and we all have our own ways of coping with difficult news.
As others have said, do whatever you feel is right for you at this moment. I am sorry to hear that you are feeling scared and vulnerable and remember feeling that way myself back in February when I was diagnosed. You will hopefully find that things get easier for you as you start your program of treatment as your focus will change, but for now just be kind to yourself.
Izzypal…All the best for your operation next week, let us know how you get on. Don’t worry about ‘bothering’ people, if they think you’re moaning (which I’m sure they won’t) then that is for them to deal with. If you feel you need to talk then go right ahead, it’s time to think about your needs for a change.
HC xx
Hello KC’sgran and Izzy
just wanted to reiterate what everyone is saying, this is your journey, not anyone else’s and although your sister may be responding as best she can, its not her call, its yours.
You deserve to get all the love and support that you want, and have people aware of whats happening with you, at a pace that suits you.
The start of the journey is, in a way, the toughest bit because its like being in a foreign country where you don’t know the language, and you have turmoil on so many levels, while you try to make sense of the practical stuff.
There are lots of us on here who have been where you are and are rooting for you - you aren’t alone with this
be kind to yourself
monica xxx
Hello hippychick and daisyleaf,
many thanks for your kind words of support, I have spoken with my own doctor for the first time today about my bc and I have also had a good talk with my bc nurse at the hospital they were so loverly and I feel much better and more confident than I did before. i also find the people on the forum very supportive of eachother,
many thanks Izzy.
Hi. I am in a similar position but I intend to tell people because there are lots of practical and emotional reasons why ir will help, and also people will need to know that i wont be able to do some of my usual activities,
I am stupidly superstitius. a few years ago my daughter told me she was expecting a baby about 6 weeks into the pregnancy and I mentioned it to a friend, later on she lost the baby and I felt guilty that it wqs my fault for telling my friend so early, i know this sounds silly, but its how I felt. Later she got pregnant again and I didnt tell anyone til 4 months and all went well with this and her second baby.
With the breast diagnosis my husband and children know and one of my brothers. I will have surgery June 3nd so will tell my other brother and close family members at the end of this week and then will feel free to tell other people , once my family know. I will tell people as and when it comes up , such as telling anyone who I would normally see during a week that i wont be there and why.
So, don’t take your sister’s advice, but wait until nearer the time of surgery to tell people at what you think is the right moment. Everyone knows someone who has had the condition and they may well cheer you up by telling good news atories of the people they know who had it and who are now living with it and getting on with life, or who have been completely cured.
Hi Mano…wow it’s good to see you here…and now you are the one giving advice and info this time…I’m proud of you xx
It is so flippin difficult to know what to do, how to react etc etc but everyone will agree that there’s always so much support here and I for one am so thankful that I can come here.
Good luck for the 6th June…I’m sure we’ll be exchanging messages a lot before then tho
Izzypal…good luck for next week…hope all goes well and that’s another hurdle crossed.
kcsgran hope you’re doing well xx
Hugs Sue xx
HI WE ALL KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL my first words when i was diagnosed was not for my self but how i was going to tell my daughter and elderly mam and dad sister etc.i didnt even tell my husband at first when i found my lump i dont know how but i did find the strength from somewhere and my bcare nurse said to me JULIE ITS ALSO THE WAY YOU TELL PEOPLE if you are strong and postive and explain to them the much improved treatments there are these days you will find that its a huge hurdle and relief when you can share this with the ones you love and like my little 78 yr old mam they will probably suprise you how strong they are i never thought she would be my rock ( and yes sometimes we crumble ) but if you are strong for them they will be i told them i cant have any negativity or weeping and whaling around me and you will get through this but you must share it it might just be your sister shocked reaction i have had neighbours and friends run for the hills cos they dont know what to say or help but the true friends and family will be there no matter what sending you lots of hugs and love to you xxxxx julie it will be a huge weight lifted off you when people know
Many thanks for all your good wishes for my op next week, i’ll just be glad when it’s here. The waiting and uncertainty is rather unnerving I just want to get on with it now! Best wishes for everyone else who is in the same position at present, at least we can all talk to eachother on here.
Izzyxxx
Izzy…
Best of luck for your op, hope all goes well for you. I was pretty fine after my op thankfully and I wish the same for you.xx
Mano…
hope you are doing well and are getting your head around all of the overwhelming information that you never dreamed that you’d be dealing with, thinking of you 
xx
kcsgran…
also hope you are ok and following your instincts and finding your way through this too…gosh I can hardly believe that it’s only weeks since I was in that position too as a newbie and not knowing what to do or where to turn…mind you i am now post op and having to find my way around the next step now! Your grandsons sound adorable…mine has just moved away to southampton (10 months old) after living here since birth …it’s so quiet without him and my daughter here xx
Hugs to all as ever Sue xxx