Oh Jo, thank goodness, it isn’t just me! I get so bl**dy irritable and grumpy and if someone says “stay positive” I just feel like screaming! The ups and downs can happen hourly, daily or weekly and I just don’t know when it’s coming!
I do hope once a get a more definitive diagnosis and some dates I will feel better, but like you Claire, everything seems to change every time I see/speak to the hospital!
Staying patient is something I’m trying very hard to do but it isn’t easy because it hasn’t been very straightforward and I am getting increasingly scared as time goes on…I feel like a bomb waiting to go off!!
Hi Ladies & Barry, we all have down days which I think is very understandable. You can’t be upbeat all the time. I find I am at my worst whilst waiting ( like you ladies at the mo, I hate being in limbo). Also when people keep saying to Me “you look good” xxx
Thank you everyone for your replies, I think part of it is that I’m impatient to just get started with whatever needs to be done. Also, I read a load of stuff about secondary BC yesterday which hasn’t really helped and has got me thinking about a load of other things. I need to stop reading so much online.
I need to think about nice things that are happening. We’re having our garden landscaped, which started today, and are lucky enough to be having a hot tub delivered later this week. As we don’t have children and aren’t likely to because of fertility issues, we thought we’d splash out. I just hope that I can enjoy it whilst in having treatment!
Claire, did they say how long the biopsy results would be? When’s your next appointment with the consultant? Xx
Ho ho Jill, it’s getting dark earlier here these days so if I’m glowing nicely, it will come in useful when I go out. my volunteer driver from the WRVS phoned today to check my details. I was very impressed. Not sure if he’ll be taking and bringing me home every day but anything is a bonus. I still have difficulty driving as my shoulder is painful and keeps locking up. It started after the first surgery and became worse after the last one. I’m going to have some physio on it in a couple of weeks. OH has just been put on some new medication and they’ve told him not to drive for a month, great timing! Dentist went well and I managed to stay fully clothed! One of my customers sent me a huge box of biscuits to keep me fed thro the rads (so kind) so I’m taking them with me tomorrow to put in the kitchen. Everyone can enjoy them then. No such things as marshmallows at Leicester! Hugs to all xx Francine
Sorry to sound blunt here but there’s no empirical evidence at all for cannabis curing cancer and I really get fed up with people being given false hope with these so called miracle cures. Some cancers do spontaneously remit and we don’t know why. What are they expecting people to do, go and find some dodgy dealer in a back alley and get given God knows what. You could end up with rat poison. ??
The whole thing about causes, food and cures is a such minefield! I have been trying to find accurate information on just one aspect (about node clearance) and I came accross some interesting papers about it. I forwarded them to my daughters fiancée as he is a Dr of Medicinal Chemistry and works for a large pharmaceutical company. He checks out the journal and the quality of the research etc, and often has to point out some pretty large failures in them. And those are published scientific papers…you have to be really careful on Google and be sure you’re looking at a properly researched documents. Be particularly careful of those that make sweeping statements and use emotive language. If cannabis cured cancer, you would probably be able to get it through the NHS. ?
Sorry, have had a busy afternoon at the hospital. Went and saw Mr C which went as well as it could do. He was happy with the scan results, which came back clear, as in there was no new cancer cells showing up in any places we weren’t aware of, and he confirmed it was contained in my right breast and in a couple of lymph nodes in my right arm pit. I know I still have cancer, but I was so relieved that there were no other surprises and felt like a weight had been lifted, as I’d convinced myself that it was going to be elsewhere. So now we have a plan, turned out he’d pencilled me in for the 5th November and was just waiting for the scan to come back, so now that’s been confirmed…,.No fireworks for me that night! We’re going to go with a MX and ANC on the right side. He seemed very confident about it all and said that I’d be fine. The BCN’s were also there and said they indicted chemo would start in January followed by rads. After a chat with the BCNs I was sent downstairs for my pre-op assessment and have an appointment for next week to talk about bras and prosthetics.
I feel very relieved and have had a couple of glasses of fizz tonight. Like I said, it’s still awful but at least I know it’s contained for now, I have a treatment plan, and it’s not as bad as I was imagining in my head. I know that once the op has happened I’ll have a chance to enjoy Christmas before chemo begins and I don’t need to rush out and buy a wig just yet. I had tickets for a show at the O2 on 6th November which I won’t now be going to, so my plan is to sell them and then have a spa day before the op.
Claire, have they given you an idea of dates for your mx? Maybe we will be there at the same time?! Sissy xx
Claire, your consultant is Mr W isn’t it? I know that Mr C is on holiday at some point soon. I take it you’ve heard nothing more about your results? Amanda, have you heard anymore? Sissy xx
Sissy great result. What a weird world BC is! Feeling like celebrating when you’re facing a major op is only something we can understand. Like me when I was told that after 3 ops they’d finally got a clear margin but I’d be having 25 sessions of rads. I positively skipped out the hospital even though I still had more stuff to go through. The relief of not having bad news makes you a bit giddy! I had Grade 3 invasive but fortunately no nodes involved so escaped MX and ANC and chemo. Sending you hugs. Amanda, yep there’s a lot of research papers out there that don’t stand up to peer review and it’s so difficult to sort out the wheat from the chaff I worked for The Medical Research Council and a lot of those papers are funded by drug companies with their own agendas. ANC clearance has definitely been under scrutiny in the States recently and it is a very difficult decision. Was it just the sentinel nodes that were positive in your case?
Hello it’s a while since I’ve posted it’s been a roller coaster ride. Had my mastectomy and two nodes removed. The cancer in breast has been removed though cells weRe found in the nodes which I was upset about. I am due to see the oncologist in a couple of weeks to go through treatment. Likely to be radiotherapy with medication and possibly chemotherapy. I won’t lie I’m scared utterly and totally. I’m trying not to be and be positive I’m struggling. My consultant said this is now prevention treatment belt and braces to protect me. I just can’t get my mind to think it I hope I can soon x
Oh dear think I will stick to eating healthy and stick to lots of spinach and fish stay away from red meats and look after myself…nearly finished 2nd week back at work ive dine far to much xtra work this week and friday cant come quick enough felt so tired last night …if I finish early enough today maybe long hill walk afyer work fresh air and pick some more raspberries and blackberries made a lovely apple and blackberry crumble. and the dark fruits are so good for you…
Cant get my head round this lymphodemia malarki hard to understand and do these gengle massages twice a week work has anyone else had this and does it ever go away ? X
christine x
xxx