Hi all, I’m new here I was diagnosed on Wednesday and when I was there I was really positive, cracking jokes and just taking it all in my stride. But the last two days I feel I’ve been hit by a truck and can’t stop crying. It feels like people say “sorry to hear you have cancer” and then disappear and get on with their lives. Even writing this I don’t feel like it’s happening to me. I don’t really know what I want but im just lost.
That was exactly how I felt about three weeks ago Missy. I am so sorry you’ve had this diagnosis. I couldn’t put into words what I wanted. I knew I wanted to be treated normally then when nobody said anything I wanted them to. I also felt like I was in a parallel universe. It all takes time. Just get through each day. I am a joker but I use that to cover up the fact I am terrified. Do you have any plan at all yet? You’ve already done one of the most positive things by joining here. One word of advice avoid Google you’ll just drive yourself crazy. There is always someone here to listen and/or advise. Big hugs xx
Hi Missy,
I am so sorry to hear of your diagnosis and for the distress that this is causing. I went through this a few months ago and can totally relate to how you are feeling. I felt as if it was happening to somebody else and at times I still do. It is the waiting time that is the worst, but when you begin treatment, things do not seem quite so awful. X
Hi Missy. I was diagnosed 2 weeks ago. And I still find it all very surreal. Tbh I don’t think it’s really hit me yet.
Do you have a breast care nurse to call? I called mine just to chat at the beginning of the week, please call yours x
Also I’ve found reading posts on here help as everyone although at different stages can relate to your emotions.
Take care of yourself x
Thank you, I feel better already just knowing people understand! I have an appointment with my surgeon on Thursday to get my date for double mastectomy then I’ll start chemo a month after that.
Hi missy, sorry you have found yourself here, i was diagnosed begining of February and its a flippin scary your emotions are all over the place and it’s a bit surreal at times. Just to echo what the others have said it does get easier when treatment starts and you have a purpose to work towards. There seems to be lots of waiting also which is the thing most of us struggle with at times. Do ask questions, rant if needed this is a great place for support. Sending hugs x
I know exactly how you feel Missy I was exactly the same when I was diagnosed then again when I found out I didn’t get clear margins following the lumpectomy. You will have ups and downs it is an emotional roller coaster. What is your diagnosis. Lou x
Hi Missy sorry you are here, I got diagnosed two weeks ago, I am starting chemo in Tuesday, and when we say we know how you feel, we really do, for me one day I was carrying on ad normal, and then I would be paralysed with fear, and the next day up down, I thought they had made a mistake, and it couldn’t be happening, it does get easier,and you some how get through it, I was trawling these boards like a drug addict, and believe this forum is your savior, keep talking on here, and as soon ad things start moving, you will feel more in control big hug xxxxxxx
Hi Missy just to echo what everyone else said. I’m 42, was diagnosed in Jan. Had WLE, followed by ANC chemo starts 6th April, I have a holiday in Florida to enjoy first. You will be very up and down, I’ve been quite level recently but after my oncology appt a week as yesterday I spent two days crying. Be kind to yourself, keep in touch on here there’s lots of support xx
I’m having one of those lonely days today. I haven’t told many people so in front of most I’m having to be 'normal ’ when I feel anything but. I was diagnosed at the beginning of Feb but haven’t got my op (lumpectomy) til next week & I think the wait is getting to me now. I keep getting told by those I have told ‘oh it can’t be that serious if they’ve left it that long!’ Really? I have breast cancer but no of course it isn’t serious!
Hi Girls
Reading your posts takes me back and stirs up so many memories. “Surreal, parallel universe, hit by a truck, terrified, it doesn’t feel real” - I can remember using all of those words to describe how I was feeling during those first few weeks immediately after diagnosis, yet here I am, due to have my second post-cancer mammogram in a few months (there was no sign of cancer when I had the first one) and I’m doing just great - honest! Everything seems so strange and terrifying in this beginning stage where you all are, and you feel so fearful, depressed and miserable that it is impossible to project your imagination forward and envisage a time in the future when you will be able to feel happy again because it seems so far out of your reach. Well BELIEVE ladies, there IS hope, life CAN be happy again, I am proof of that. Cancer treatment is tough, seems to take for ever, and I have no doubt that you will shed tears along the way because I did, but have faith. When I look back now it seems just as though I have had a bad dream and I have woken up at last. I am so very, very glad that treatment was available, that I had it and best of all - it worked!
Great post Feistyflora thank you. I am having a good day today. Busy at work usual office politics and general moaning and Chinese whispers . I actually forgot about BC for a few hours. I know I will have ups and downs and post like yours really help. Thanks again. Lou x
Hi ladies,
Like the fiesty lady i am on the otherside looking back. Be kind to yourselves, take a moment or ten when you need to.
I have recommended this booklet so often you might think i was the publisher… i found Cordelia Galguts booklet - Emotional support thru breast cancer, an alternative handbook an excellent read. I loaned it to a local lady in my private facebook support group and she too ravers about it. She is much further down the road than i and now offers support herself too.
Well done on finding the forum early and gaining advice / rant space.
My alarm just went for work, best wishes all,
Lexilou x
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Feisty, I always love reading your posts. Thank you.
I’m a bit further along the line than most of the people on this thread, having finished chemo, but still have a few wobbly days. I am starting to see the light at the end though and the support and friendship provided by this site has been a big positive.
Big hugs to all.
Ruth xxxx