I was diagnosed yesterday (20/12/2011) with breast cancer. I was told I would need a mastectomy and removal of lymph nodes. I’m so scared. My family and friends are being wonderful, but they can’t be with me all the time and it’s those alone times that I’m not coping well.
I’m booked in for a bone scan on 28th December and told the op will be in about 4 weeks time. I can’t remember half of what the doctor and nurse told me yesterday although my sister was with me and she does remember.
My mind won’t stop going over and over everything.
Linda
Hi Linda,
I don’t really know what to say to help but didn’t want to leave you here alone. I am in a similar position except that I don’t have my treatment plan yet, waiting for biopsy results but warned by the radiologist to expect the worst.
Yes, time spent alone sucks, doesn’t it. Go visit friends who don’t know, so you have to keep up a good front? Go to the cinema? Get stuck into that housework that you have been putting off? I find I can forget for easily half an hour at a time in front of a favourite TV programme.
What I learned from a different sort of crisis a few years ago is *not* to look at the big picture. If you look at all that might lie ahead you think you can’t face it. Look just at what you need to get through today, that is do-able, and tomorrow you can worry about later.
Good luck, consider yourself hugged,
CFS
Hi, sorry to hear of your diagnosis. The begining is always the hardest, you will find plenty of support on this forum, I done it all wrong, I googled continually and scared myself, please use this forum for questions and not the internet. At the moment everything you feel is normal but you will get through this, take care , karen xx
hi, sorry you have found yourself on this site, but you have done the right thing. the ladies on here are wonderful at giving support and advice so keep posting and the responses will hopefully help you.
i was dx 17th nov, but even now it is still all very new and raw, but things have been moving pretty fast with appointments and op.
has CFS has suggested to do, i have taken 1 day at a time. things will improve a little as the days pass by and especially when you know your treatments and things start happening.
if you have been assigned at breast care nurse then dont be afraid to talk to her about anything, i have found mine a great help and support. also the helpline on this site is also very good if you need to ask questions or advice about anything - even if you just want to talk to someone.
big hugs
TTM xxx
Hi Linda,
Welcome to the Breast Cancer Care discussion forums, as you can see the users of this site are great at support, they have a wealth of knowledge and experience between them.
To help you along a little further I have put for you below links to a couple of BCC’s publications you may find helpful. There’s also the helpline available to you if you need a good listening ear or to ask what ever questions you need to. Calls to the helpline are free, 0808 800 6000 lines open Mon-Fri 9-5 and Sat 9-2.
Resource pack:
www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/publications/diagnosed-breast-cancer/resource-pack-primary-early-breast-cancer-bcc145
I hope this helps. Take care,
Jo, Facilitator
Thank you so much for all your support and the “hugs”. I’m trying to take one day at a time.
I did phone the support nurse yesterday and she ran through everything again and I’m seeing her after my bone scan on 28th Dec.
Linda
Just wanted to say I am thinking about you, the waiting after diagnosis is the worst time because you can’t helpthinking the worst.
I know it is hard but just try and take each day at a time, do things you enjoy and treat yourself. Buy in some ready meals so you don’t have to worry about food.
The support you will get from this site is fantastic, ask anything as someone will have been through it or worried about it.
Keep you family and friends close and accept all help.
Love to you
FiXX
Linda
Just wanted to say the same as everyone else is to take each day as it comes. I was diagnosed 2 weeks ago and having surgery (Lumpectomy and all nodes removed) on 19th Jan. I have randomly cried on a daily basis! I have had great support from this forum so please keep posting it does help because you can say exactly how you feel and we understand.I have rested and taking support from family and friends and going to take each stage as it comes.
Big hug and thinking of you.
Maryxxxxxxxx
Hi to you and any other ladies who are in the process of being DX or waiting.
I am so sorry you are going through this awful time, but welcome to this fantastic and supportive site -WARNING THIS IS A LONG MESSAGE SO APPOLOGIES IN ADVANCE.
I can relate to all your concerns and fears along with many others here on this site. YOU WILL COME THROUGH IT HONEST MY LOVELIES!! IT’S A TOUGH PERIOD AND TEARS WILL FLOW AT RANDOM TIMES AT REALLY ODD TIMES TOO ONE MIN OK THEN NEXT EMOTIONAL. Talk talk talk really helps and personally i found researching everything helped me, not everyone likes to do that though. Do Ask Questions when you are ready!!!
This stage from checking lump and waiting for results is the hardest and most mentally draining for everyone!!.SUCKS IT REALLY DOES.
And as its happening to you it feels like the worst thing to ever of happend and you feel like you must of really done something wrong in a previous life or pissed the Gods off up there!! I KNOW I DID AND STILL DO. Everything else will feel so less important at this moment in time.
Im only 42!! yeah a young spring chicken lol well, the mind likes to thinks so.
(you see when i was 23 i had a scare and it turned out ok)
NOW 20 years later…to present day.(more advanced medicine and available info and web sites and support oh and options too)
This time last week I was like you worry reading up etc I went to Hosp on 7th Dec had all the works done re Mam u/s an 3 core biopsies and was told suspicious lumps and enlarged Lymphs had to go on 13th for confirmation of cancer in lumps and lymph etc will be put on Tamoxafien as i am eastrogen receptive so this drug will help block eastrogen.
Shocking to say the least as i was expecting a lump removed and maybe a viral infection re lymph anyway, in the space of a week I now have a date for op on 6th of Jan for MX and axillary lymph removal - My worries NOW are what is the right reconstruction for me. Everybody is different in handling each stage of their journey. Which ever way you deal with it is fine and its ok you are allowed to feel the way you do.
A huge scary tiger just turned up at my front door and barged his way into my life! I am very scared and know it could maul and maim me! But with the right support from Doctors, Nurses, Family and Friends I know I/we can tame it! Eventually the tiger will go and sit in the kitchen instead of pacing around me! I aim for the tiger to go in the garden, in the not too distant future. Once in a while, I will glance out of the window and will be reminded of him. I know he won’t ever really go away but at least the tiger will be out of my house!
My thoughts are with you all and i want to send you all my warmest best wishes at this festive time and MAY ALL OUR FUTURES BE A BRIGHT ONE
XXXXXXX p.s do let me know how you all get on. x
Last edited by Bicardicat on 23 Dec 2011 20:23, edited 1 time in total.
hi Ladies
i have to agree with what has already been said, that you are at the worst time, just after diagnosis.
i was diagnosed 6th september, and had mx and lymph node clearance 29th sept, and between those dates was hard. Personally i coped by carrying on as normal, continued to go to work (i only told who i really had to, it made it easier to act as normal)
i also had a bone scan and a ct scan because of the node involvement, they were a little bit daunting, but the staff have all been fantastic, and will explain everything to you
This site was a huge help to me, most of the time i would just read through other threads, and often would find the answers i needed that way. If you have any questions at any time, post it on here and someone will answer you, that it certain
And just to say that the treatment is managable, i am now half way through Chemo, and i can see the light at the end of the tunnel
Best Wishes
Gill x
Hi Linda
Im so sorry you have found yourself on this journey and i really feel for you as i remember how horribly overwhelming and scarey it is at the beginning but you will get through this and it will become easier to deal with but emotions will be extreme at times throughout.
Great advice already given, keep posting and ask whatever you need to ask, some very wise comforting ladies on this site that have helped me no end.
Big (((hugs)))
Clare x
ps. bicardicat - love the tiger analogy and your pic x
Hi Linda,
I am with you on this journey.
I was diagnosed on the 15th but lucky enough to have my op on the 20th. All very fast though so it still feels like a roller coaster. Now a long wait for results, and to find out what treatment comes next.
I know how hard the waiting is. Not sure how you are feeling but I am OK one minute and in floods of tears the next.
I also took someone along to the appointments with me and find it helps to make sure they understand what I want to know before, and can listen and remind me as it can all be so overwhelming.
Lynda
Hi Linda
Earlier this year after my diagnosis I didn’t know if I would see another Christmas. It is such a scary diagnosis, I guess you automically think the worst. But thanks to the amazing treatment I received here I am as (un) healthy as I was last Christmas. So there is always hope. And I can only repeat what other people have said about how much support and strength I found on this website. I was humbled by what others had gone through, and still am.
There is not a good time of year to have this type of news, but I guess this comes close, and my virtual hugs go out to you.
Fingers crossed you will come through it all and out the other side.
xxx.