Sorry Ali crossed message - arr ok I’m just learning but makes sense - yes def chemo so no test then ( phew ) …, my bcn said really worth asking for that ad I’m very hormonal person - very sick to point of drip in hospital with all 3 babies in early pregnancy and my pmt is off the scale …,…, hope you well Ali and wigs are looking good if you wearing them yet ? Xx
Glad to clear that up. I’m really well thanks. So far sticking to scarves and hats. May try a wig next week when I’m working with clients.
Ali x
Sounds like your having to constantly chase them which is not good … i feel the opposite where in a matter of going back to docs on 5th jan till today ive had mammo us biopsy consultation bone scan and ct then find out next plan of action next wednesday seemed of moved so quick .even at the hospital ive had no major wait for my tests when im there .my breast cancer nurse went through as much as she could with me .offered to phone all the people i may need to talk to regarding my fears to do with kyle and my job and if im of work . Do hope your new consultant is much better and puts it all in motion xx
Hi Ali, just wanted to say…re wigs…I was upset when I lost my hair…and id love it back…but ive dug out my wigs from 16 years ago, plus was given a nice wig and also got one from the hosp …had to pay £60 for it tho
( they were really good quality wiges and free in 2001 and I was given two!)
one is a blonde, bob, one is a short one browny grey, and the older pair are brown…one long and one a bob…and im having fun confusing people!
i even thought I might get some in green and blue, but they might make me look older!
talk soon
Moijanxx
Hi, I’m just coming over for waiting for results thread. I was diagnosed yesterday. I had a lump removed last week and it was invasive bc, it only measured 3.4mm, so caught really early. The surrounding tissue is showing pre cancerous cells, so am having a lumpectomy on 6th Feb and they will also remove 2 lymph nodes, though the US showed this to be clear so I am hoping the the US was correct. Then after that, if the margins are all good, it will be radiotherapy, then tamoxifen.
After I was told yesterday I felt a weight had been lifted as I really did struggle waiting for results as I knew it was going to be BC. Now I know I feel I can deal with it.
Today I’m feeling a bit shell shocked and when I’ve told some friends it feels really surreal like I’m talking about someone else.
Also I think everyone expects me to be a crumbling heap but I’m actually not as worried anymore, is that wrong to feel like that? I feel positive as I am sure the outcome will be good and the consultant was really positive, obviously with no guarantee.
But today I keep thinking I should feel depressed and down, but I don’t. And now I’m thinking if i’m too positive I might jinx myself!! I know I must sound mad and sorry for the long post.
I’m actually more upset about postponing a holiday we had planned at Easter, taking the kids to Florida for the first time. I know in the whole scheme of things it’s only a holiday and we will go later. Just the kids are on countdown until we go, so I’m really disappointed for them.
Everyone of the other thread has been so positive and it has kept me going while I was waiting for the results.
A xx
Oh dear I know I said I couldn’t do this forum but I am climbing the walls. I don’t get the results for my reincission until Wednesday (how cruel is that - op 13th). I found out I am HER2 negative and an onco DX test has been done. But why can’t they just tell me. This is awful. My ribs still really hurt. I am in agony. OK breathe …
God I know that feeling Hun … I went to docs and she gave me diazepam. It’s very good and god it helped at taking the massive edge of it when it comes … I only take one 2 m pill and it really helps me within 10 mins as panic can be overwhelming…
I had 2 days like that at the beginning of the week … but after some good results and a good talk with a clever bright and funny bc I feel ok .,
It’s so bad waiting for results … not far off real torture I suspect ( maybe to dramatic) … but when I feel like that it’s like chest tightness and sense of dread just won’t go …,
I had a great day today lunch with my hubby, cafe rouge steak; and a bit of shopping in Cheltenham…
so I’ve gone from deep low to back to normal in a week . And I feel good and positive again.
I don’t know how useful this is for you so hope it is a bit . and some other ladies better at this than me will be on soon xxxxxxxx try to relax in a bath maybe ? ( sorry I’m rubbish) xx
Zena xx
Thanks, Moijan. At the moment I am rocking the Sinead look. But I have a lovely wig called Bex, and I’ll probably try her tomorrow.
Ang, despite a bit of stress around my CT, I’ve been neither depressed nor overtly freaked. I have spent time thinking through what is the worst thing that could happen, but even that helped keep me calm. I’ve mostly been joking and finding it quite interesting. Your circumstances sound pretty good, so I wouldn’t worry too much about feeling you should respond differently.
My surgeon (who is a bit of an arse IMO), told me off for being too rational!
Mysti, sorry it’s such a long wait. “Breathe” is a good approach. Most people say the waiting for results is the worst part, once you get them it seems easier to cope.
Hope everyone else is as ok as possible
Ali x
Mysti - its the uncertainty that is the pits, as you say - breathe, it will resolve, there’s nothing like that b… awful limbo of waiting, with mind in overdrive.
Ang - as said on the other thread, taking it in your stride is just fine & no reason not to!
ann x
Hi all .dont know if its good or bad news today ct scan showed cancer has only spread to lymph nodes in arm area .still waiting on bone scan .cause tumour is quite large im starting on chemo to shrink tumour for surgery .it was nice to be at work today took my mind of things x
Hi Maria
I also have large tumour and in lymph nodes and my consultant said today it is curable and may not spread and others who don’t have lymphs may spread - it’s no bearing on what it will do next if anything…
I am also starting chemo next week to shrink before surgery so they can save more skin for reconstruction.
Hope that helps Hun .
Glad you got to take your mind off it at work
Zena
Xxxxxxxx
Forgot - she Also said the lymphs maybe swollen but unless they test them all no way of knowing if they have cancer cells from ct or MRI so maybe just raised due to tumour xxx
Take it as a positive, Maria, your team is on the case to deal with it.
hugs
ann x
Hi zena .knew it was in underarm lymph from biopsy but ct showed that they have not spread from there .My breast care nurse rang me at work so i felt little more at ease for weekend . i felt so bad as i had to cut her short as some bloke was staring at me through the window wanting to be served a pint .Then he was moaning cause i kept him waiting whilst another couple were moaning about me being on my phone .if there was a time i could tell anyone in an impolite manner to do one yesturday was it lol .finished at 7 came home and had bit of a melt down .xx
Thank you ann , think its slowly sinking in this is happening to me .x
Maria you are doing so well, remember it’s only been a few days for us both to get our head around it.
For me it’s all really surreal, like I’m talking about someone else. And it was information overload once they told me my results.
I’m slowly getting my head around it.
My next op for lumpectomy is 6th Feb and also 2 nodes being taken. If, and fingers x’d, all clear I’ll start rads at a later date.
We told the kids today, ages 5, 8&9. Oh to be a kid! We told them that I had a bug of bad cells in my boob and doctors need to take it out and then they will shoot lasers into my boob to kill off any germs the bug has left behind! They found this hysterical, apart from my 5 yr old who has severe seperation anxiety and doesn’t want me to go to hospital!
Maria, we will get through this and come out smiling in the other side xx
Think its worse cause being single mum , im the one who pays it all the one who takes him to school .no partner to hold my hand haha .all my friends have been full of kind words and if i need them to come to appointments ect .though tbh when i needed someone for scans on thursday they were all busy ( god that sounds so selfish of me ).have a feeling its going to be a long road on my own .so glad for this site right now .Though my brothers wife text me saying he has told his manager that he may need to drop everything at last min if i need lifts to hospital or for my son ect.which is nice as we not the closest siblings ever x
Hi. I feel ashamed … my outburst was uncalled for. Hey ho … hell of a night though. No sleep even with an added Valium. Guess I’m just not able to cope with this. You never think it will happen to you.
Rach I love your post (trying to stay positive). The bra thing was a good idea. I think I’ve just lost my personality! We don’t laugh anymore and are trying to wish the days away. I had a bra experience on Black Friday. Bought a really nice bra and matching kecks. Ended up having to take them back as they were hideously too big. I got a lecture on M&S bra fitting service. I think the women thought I was totally stupid.
At at some point things have got to get better. Hopefully we, at least, will know what will happen next on Wednesday.
marianne
And they will get better. We are on one of the hardest roads living in limbo land. I am trying to find positive things every day to focus on as I am struggling to keep going. Next Thursday seems too far away for me !!!
I keep trying to tell myself that things can only get better from here. The words I heard last Thursday will ring in my ears for ever ‘Hi Rachel, I am sorry but it is bad news I’m afraid’ they are the words I thought I would never hear and still question them.
My heart goes out to you Mysti, this is probably the hardest journey we will travel, but we can do it together.??
Take care and keep strong ???Xxxx