… hey all have just started posting this week after browsing for soooo long but have become quite down after being embroiled in another thread which has got a bit out of hand for me. so just wanted to pop in and say hi - looking for some light relief !! hope to speak to you all soon
take it easy Max
Hi,Max and welcome,
I think i know which thread you mean and sorry that you are feeling a bit down.I thought long and hard about posting on that thread too but after past discussions of a simular type over the last yr that ive been comeing on this site ,i decided against it
as i found out a long time ago that anything to do with the word positive is Taboo on here sadly. Id just finished reading your last post ,and well said it was, it is a sad reflection that all of us ladies who have BC should be supporting each other not knocking each other down for each haveing a sometimes different opinion, we all should have the freedom to post without fear of being attacked .Im( dare i say it one of the Positve ladies ) and not ashamed to admit it , i may or may not die of BC but im damed if im gonna spend my life in doom and gloom otherwise as far as im concerned BC would have already killed me. We should all respect each others views.
Rant over feel better for that lol
Glad that you decided to jion the forums there are lots of us ladies on here who would love to chat and help and support if we can , so keep posting and keep smileing
All the best
Lindiloo x
Hi Max and Lindiloo
I agree with you…
I can’t do the doom and gloom either and I refuse absolutely to feel bitter about having cancer… there is no point!! Smiling - I’m more fed up about having athletes foot!!
It’s the first time I have encountered a thread like that and I think another time I’d walk away a lot sooner.
So, it’s a bank holiday weekend - anyone got nice plans? I’m meeting up with my family tomoz and then off to see my beloved for a week on Monday - hmm anyone know of a suticase which packs itself??
Take care
j x
Hi Max Lindiloo and Jen
Max I have just read your thread and wanted to say well said. I have posted on it this morning against my better judgement as I had decided not to say any more but we cant let the beggars get us down can we.
Anyway as I said in the DDI last night my beloved is on his way home today after 3 weeks away so I am really looking forward to that [but not the 3 weeks of washing he will have with him]. Tomorrow I am doing Race for Life in Norwich so wish me luck and I will let you know my time, although don’t expect too much cos I will have to walk it as running causes too much bounce!
AJxxx
Ok thats it I’m definately not going back to that thread!
AJxxx
Me neither. too depressing
Good morning ladies, thanks for all your kind comments, what a difference to read this thread, than the other one. Glad to know i am not alone. I am usually one who stays in the background and reads the forums and never contributes, but I posted on that one honestly and then it was as if a crime had been committed. I didnt realise it was a crime to express an opinion that differed with the majority - but obviously is !
I had seriously considered avoiding this site last night after posting but have decided not to, this is a breast cancer forum for all our needs, but I think I will be careful what i post in future - such a shame to feel like that but as i said i feel certain characters take over threads. I feel as though anyone who mentions anything positive to do with cancer gets torns strips off of, i feel for me the only way to have got through this horrendous situation was to try and look back and think right what can i glean from this and if meeting amazing friends is not classed as a good thing, well i dont know what is !
thanks again girls, well it is a rainy miserable morning here so hopefully it will get brighter for the holiday weekend as promised to take my son for a day out.
AJ Good luck with Race for Life !!!
have a lovely weekend x
gah… i started posting on it and then stopped… but it’s a bit like having an itchy rash!!! You can’t stop scratching…
Heavens above - nobody wants a cancer of any kind - none of us went oh lovely… I’ve just been told I will need a mastectomy or whatever… but once the shellshock was over (including getting very very very drunk!!!), i just got on with it because i couldn’t see nay other way of doing it.
My breast care nurse described me as pragmatic and i have made them laugh many times, with tales of me having the MRI and that i’d never expected 42 complete strangers to be taking such interest in my ageing bossooms!! I have reached the point where if a yob said show us yer tits… i might well do!!
have a lovely time with yoru husband AJ - make him load his own washing…you need to save your strength for the walk!!!
take care all and let’s keep the faith with positive!!
Jen x
Maximise
Again, you have summed it up so well. It is not the disease itself that is the positive thing, just like all the other horrible things that happen in life such as war, rape, murder etc etc. It is how people react and cope and how out of all the shit, they can still smile now and again. And sometimes it needs a terrible crisis to help clear your mind from the shallow, meaningless clutter and to focus on what really matters. Yo u only need to read stories of people who were in concentration camps to see how they used positive thoughts to get through and I dare say some of them would say they experienced pros because it changed their lives. What I think was the main point you raised is that whatever our opinion we should not be made to feel like we are somehow peculiar or strange because we feel differently.
You feel free to let of whatever steam you like my dear. I didn’t refrain from posting in then end but hopefully put in such as way as no one could possibly feel I’m undermining their feelings.
I started a thread like that not longer after I was diagnosed and had a similar reaction, so I left the forum for a while. But decided I have a right to be here and I don’t need anyone permission, and neither does anyone else. You included.
As soon as google has indexed it I shall be starting a thread on chemo and campervans as that’s the little treat me and my OH have decided to give ourselves to help cope with this. Today we shall be dealing with the rust. Ah bank holiday weekends… DIY … Yeeeahhha.
I’ll be starting chemo in 2 weeks so best make the most of the time not mope around here… oh that’s right I don’t do moping anymore, or boredom… oops that’s a bit positive isn’t it (ducks 
OK not strictly true, my dark side occasionally mopes but I try and ignore it as best I can.
Lots of love
Angie
Hi Ladies
Like you I do find some of these threads bring me on a downer so I avoid them now so can honestly say not sure which thread you are on about but maybe the moderators could have a link for postives only? I am sure this site must lose many very lonely and afraid women and men because of these kinds of threads
Karen
Angie and Karen
I so agree with you - I do worry how it must feel for new people or those waiting for results.
The sooner treatment begins the sooner it is over… i rail against having to go for appointments etc and i get fed up of being tired but you learn to live with it and work round it.
Campervans… hey - i hope this is going to have lurve flowers and so on for the paint finish! It’ll be a great way to get round and I’ve always fancied one!!
Good for you girls,
Vertangie i remember you posting a while back suggesting a positive news stories thread, i contributed a couple of times on it in favour of the same, unfortunately it ended up with the very same sort of attack , sadly i have know of many ladies who have left this site for the same reasons which is just not fair,
No one should be frightened of posting on subjects that mabe a few might not agree with , everyones entilited to their opinion, and this is after all said and done a support site , All the other leading breast cancer sites have sections of stories of hope, and positive threads ,which dont offend others ,but unfortunately here it would seem that anything to with the P word /religion or/ life after death (previous topics)is an definate no no and it is always the same few who launch a attack on the poster.In fact i cringe now when i see a new post suggesting anything positve as i know its going to create an array of fury. It makes me very angry when peoples views are shot down in flames and realy think its about time that the moderaters put a stop to it and remind everyone that this site is for everyone. We are all equaly entilited to use this site and yes we are all entiltled to an opinion but for goodness sake this sort of attitude to others is just not acceptable.Hopefully the new BCC site will have changed for the better.
Hope you all have a lovely weekend take care
Love Lindiloo x
good morning…well good afternoon.
nice retreat here…have you all tried the DDI?
am having some breakfast and second cup coffee so thought, naturally, I would investigate how everyone is doing.
yes, ditto, good for you.
I worry how newbies will find the forum if they only read that thread…it would have scared me off
but we are a complex group of women…men…and we all react differently
If I could be candid, I think it is a personal choice, isn’t it?
we are each stuck with our dx, but as debsincornwall has explained in the Where Are You From thread, it truly does depend on how you look at it and what you do with the dx. It is an approach to living, no? Anyway, I am telling my BC to get lost so I can live a fuller, more productive life. DESPITE the bc and all the changes that has brought to my life. Given the option, I choose to be positive (but not shallow) and get on with my life.
Lifts glass of champers to all of you…
Emily
xxx
Hi all,
When I was a newbie (still am really!) I posted on a thread and was roundly criticised for trying to be positive for a young lass. I do believe we have to remain positive, and support each other, not spread doom and gloom. Obviously there are times when it IS gloomy, but we can still put a positive spin on it (my husband is Alistair Campbell!!! NOT!).
Life is a series of hurdles - we either jump over them, or limbo under them, but we just have to get on with it!
Here’s to all positive women!!
Sue xx
Hi all,
I don’t contribute to many sites either other than the word games etc., which I find amusing and takes your mind off the obvious.
I had to contribute to the “sexy illness” thing but like many other ladies find many of the postings too confrontational!
I too believe in positivity!
Denio x
Good for u.
well i do believe it is good for us to be positive… we aren’t hiding… just dealing with it in a different way.
Hmm - when i start moaning all the time…whether it be because my arthritis is playing up or whatever… i want to be put down!!!
jx
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
thank you. x
Well said Vodka
thank you AJXXX. i feel another scream coming but i think i’ll do that in private.