Hi I’m new to this Forum. It’s helped a lot already though to read about other folk not sleeping well and feeling wobbly. I was diagnosed in late June this year and had a lumpectomy followed by another margin being removed then radiotherapy. I am hoping to go back to work in 11 days time on a phased return but instead of getting excited and gearing myself up I’m worrying about the pain in my breast and another infection I’ve had under the skin. I feel tired and not sure if that’s the tamoxifen or that I’m still not getting my energy back. I enjoy painting and walks. Haven’t been running yet which I used to find very good. I never had problems sleeping before just the odd night before an intense schedule at work but now I am only getting a few hours sleep. I’ve been awake since 3:30am. Might just get up and finish making the Christmas Cake. You guys sound like you are experiencing something similar. I’ve found this last month I’m very tearful and emotionally vulnerable and as a result seems to be the most unsettling stage so far really. Looking forward to returning to normality soon. Iona
Hi & welcome.
If you have an infection and have pain you are still not 100% well. That could account for the tiredness and disturbed sleep. Also you had 2 operations as the first did not give good margins.
I am not on tamoxifen, so I don’t know about that.
Be kind to yourself.
I hope you will feel better soon.
I find that when I have a sleepless night I usually have a better one the next.
Hi yes I’m sure you are right. Thank you. I just began to think today about reducing my hours at work if I can in the long term and that is already making me feel less anxious. I just dont seem to have any where near the same energy levels as I did in June. I teach four days and will need to see if I can afford to go down to three. I am due to go down to half pay this month and a bit worried I am going back too soon to avoid that. I don’t want to be off again or mess up the system. Just reading advice on Becca App and this Forum helps put things in perspective. Thank you for your kind advice.
Iona
Hello and welcome to the forum where you will get loads of helo and support.
I have been on tamoxifen for a year now, I am post menopausal, I found the same in the early weeks/months of taking it that I would get very sensitive and could even cry if someone said something nice, oh and soppy ads did it for me on many occasions, especially as it was just before Xmas. That has passed now.
What hours are you going to be doing when you go back to work and is there anything in place to change these should you find you are struggling with them? What you have to keep in mind is that you have not long finished rads having had two operations so you are going to be tired as your body is still recovering.
Helena xxx
Hi Helena,
I never realised Tamoxofin could make me feel sensitive but what you describe is very similar. I’m feeling vulnerable and insecure when I really don’t need to be so that’s really helpful to know, and that it goes away eventually. I’m sure being close to Christmas stirrs up a lot of emotions.
My head teacher has been super and we have agreed 2 half days first week then two full days after which are the holidays then three days building up to the four and it is to be seen as flexible. Since agreeing this I had a setback with infection and breast pain so was not feeling so confident I can go back to the hours I was doing.
I’ve been into the Breast clinic today and they have scanned for build up of fluid which thankfully they don’t think is much so no draining needed this time and to leave well alone so I was happy to hear that.
I need to look at going to three days I think so need to look at how financially viable that is.
It’s good to talk to you. Just had a very nice cup of tea at the Maggie Centre near me and they gave me a super article by Dr Peter Harvey to read called After the treatment finishes-Then What? Its very much where I am at just now so very helpful reading. Iona x
Hi Isle. Be kind to yourself and don’t go back too soon. You will be covered by the Equalities Act and can ask for a temporary reduction in hours as a “reasonable adjustment”. This is an indefinite arrangement, so you may be able to think more positively about building up over time. I highly recommend getting occupational health involved, this will help your Head as well. I was working full time but have struggled to maintain this and am reducing to 4 days. I am on exmestane, so can’t comment on tamoxifen. Good luck with your next steps but mostly be kind to yourself x
Hi Isle,
I’m in a similar position to you. I was diagnosed in September, have had 2 operations and am currently halfway through radiotherapy. I’ve felt fine emotionally since diagnosis BUT haven’t had a good night’s sleep. It’s 6am and I’ve been awake at least 2 hours, which seems to be the norm now! I’m due to return to work on the 27th Dec. I’m a little anxious as my job is very stressful and full-on (nurse on busy paediatric unit). Occ health have recommended I do short shifts to start with (6 hours as opposed to 12.5) which I intend to do, although my managers don’t always make life easy. I’m still struggling with pain also, which I imagine will settle but it’s going to take time. I have an appointment with my consultant in a couple of weeks, so hopefully, that should put my mind at rest.
As you said, this time of year can trigger the emotions. If anything is going to tip me over the edge it will be my children’s school carol service at the local church. I love going to this, but hearing the children sing always makes me well up!
Look after yourself and best wishes when you return to work xxx
PS I used to run too! My plan is to do Couch to 5K with the local running club in January, which is how I got started 4 years ago. I thought this would be a gentle way to ease myself back in again! xxx
Hi J, yes it’s wise to reduce your hours and then build up. I have checked with HR and it is possible and need to go through my HT and OH to arrange. I think it will make it less daunting going back if I know I can cope with the hours. Just still weighing up the financial implications of salary going down. My bank have been very supportive through their Cancer Support Line when I told them my diagnosis e.g suspended overdraft daily charges for next six months. I had been worrying about their new arrangements. Also my mortgage provider has said that I can go on a payment holiday if I do go to half pay etc. It gets added to the mortgage so makes it a little more each month once I’m back on my feet but that is very helpful to know if I need it. Although I’m not a natural worrier I think it’s these kind of concerns, amongst physical side effects that have been keeping me awake lately. I only phoned up the bank two days ago and I wish I had phoned them weeks ago when I first saw the Advert on telly. Thank you for your good wishes it is something I am learning to be kind to ourselves. A good pat on the back is what we need after all. X
Hi HufflePuff,
You are doing really well to be thinking of going back to work 27th Dec especially as nurses work so hard and long shifts. I kept expecting to be back to work but at each monthly review point realised I wasn’t ready mainly as the effects of the radiotherapy built up from the end of treatment and I was very fatigued for a couple of weeks and had a bad skin reaction. The breast care specialist nurse told me when my radiotherapy finished that most people wait until four to six weeks after it ends as it keeps on affecting us eg. Pain/Fatigue etc. And that most folk wait till their radiotherapy check up 6 or so weeks later before going back to work. I didn’t feel emotional really either till now but it seems to be the reaction to everything once treatment ends and I know I would have found it impossible to stand in front of classes, although I love my job, feeling this way so I am glad I took her advice and didn’t try to go back sooner.
I’m going to a lovely night called ‘It’s Christmas’ made up of folks from churches across the city in a choir and orchestra and looking forward to that very much.
That’s a good idea getting back into running with a running club I might try that. I used to do the Park Run regularly but stopped about a year ago and I know if like to start again once I feel physically ready as so enjoyed running.let me know how you get on. Xx
Isle,
Maybe I’m being a little too optimistic so will just see how I go over the next couple of weeks. Occ health have suggested that I do something admin as opposed to running around the ward to start with. Not quite sure what I’d do tho!
Enjoy the carol concert, it sounds lovely xx