Scars are healing well went to see surgeon on Friday very pleased with her handiwork. Will start swimming in a couple of weeks. Forgot to ask about driving, I drove after about 4 weeks after the original mx but wonder if I should wait for 6 weeks after the LD flap operation. Have had first lot of saline to new implant and am now able to wear a bra some of the time. Emotionally I am fragile. Surgeon said I will need two more smaller ops to complete the process. We are now 20 months from the start with two ops to go. Fed up of feeling fatigued all the time and having things done to me. Fed up of the tamoxifen and the uncertainty about the future. Have tried to be positve throughout and do all the right things but its getting harder as time goes on. Am so much slower than I used to be. At this stage am wondering how on earth I will get back to being at work full time. Before this op I was really tired and struggling to work full time managing to work but having no energy left for hobbies in the evening or household jobs. Most people would say im coping really well friends have been visiting, I have managed to put the lipstick on etc. They say i am positive and allthe other stuff. My husband however sees the real picture,he is going through a rough time with various issues and I don’t want him to feel worse having a wife who is tired and not jolly most of the time. I sound a right moaner has anyone else felt like me. I feel like I should be greatful for all the treatment etc which I am but I just want to feel well and be how I was before b.c.
Thanks for listening
Sunflower
Hi Sunflower
Glad that your new boob is doing well - my PS wouldn’t hear of me driving for at least 6 weeks. Even when I did start, finding second gear was not always easy for a couple of weeks.
So sorry that you are feeling low. My recon was at the same time as my mx and so I started out very fit and healthy (well apart from having a cancerous lump in my boob!).
Today I’ve had my last chemo, 5 weeks of rads and 5 years of tamoxifen to come. I’ve got progressively more tired and emotionally depleted, so I don’t wonder that you’re struggling after 20 months! I would say that you have every right to feel low and, while it might sound daft, try not to worry about feeling low - you are still recovering from a major op! I was back at work (part-time for a couple of weeks) after 6 weeks - but I started with full energy levels. Don’t rush back, build your strength back first.
If you think that you need some help coming to terms and coping with your emotions and anxieties so that they don’t have a negative effect on your every day life - seek it. BC messes with your head as well as your body and there’s nothing weak or wimpy about recognising that fact and getting help.
Be patient with the physical - it does get better, but it is a slow process.
Sending big soft hugs
Diane x
Hi,
I had a delayed LD reconstruction 5 weeks ago. I started driving last week and so far no problems. I saw the physio today for a follow up appt and asked him re swimming. He said not until 12 weeks post surgery! I thought that was a long time and thought it could be beneficial but he said no.
Seems like we are all told something different!
xx
Thankyou very much for your replies. Surgeons and phisios must have slightly different ideas about what you should and should not do. Will call the helpline and make an action plan. It will do me good to have goals to aim for. I think I was hoping B.C and its affects would somehow disappear and life would be as it was before. I think I need help to push it into the background rather than make it a focus. It was a really good point to say that I am recovering from a major op. I have been doing as much as I can and it would really be better if I rested more and was kinder to myself.
Hi Sunflower
Sorry, but I don’t think life will ever be exactly as it was before. BC is a life changing event - as is a new job, moving house, getting a new partner, getting rid of an old one, etc etc.
We need to adjust and find the ‘new normal’ one that puts things into context and allows us to live our lives as healthly and happily as possible on a day to day basis. Yes, the worry about BC will always be there, but hopefully kept in a box in the dusty corners of our heads, only to be taken out and examined when we choose.
Easier said than done, like the physical healing it’ll take time and may need outside help along the way - whether that’s from sharing on here, talking with a trusted friend, or seeking help from a professional.
Sending more hugs!
Diane x
You are definitely right about the new normal. I need to work on accepting the new normal I will be much happier then. I like the idea of putting the cancer and treatments in a box. Think they are a bit too high profile in my mind at the moment. Some of my friends are great others are of the "You look so well but I have a sore knee/back etc brigade. I don’t think they are unkind but just don’t understand. It is good to come on the forum where there are people who do. I am investigating some free councelling sessions which are done through being employed. Your boss doesnt have to know. There is also a scheme in my area which is called Fit to work. It gives you advice on all sorts of things as well as work.
Hi Sunflower
ChoccieMuffinn has posted a link to a very good article by Dr Peter Harvey about the subject - I’m sure she won’t mind me repeating it…
cancercounselling.org.uk/nor … penElement
Don’t know how I’m going to react yet once all my main treatment is finished!
Diane x
Hi all,
I have noticed how you are all discussing what is the ‘new normal’ and how you will all deal with what you are/have gone through. I thought I would just let you know about a new resource pack BCC have produced called ‘Moving Forward’ - for people living with and beyond breast cancer.
This pack contains lots of information to help support and offer ressurance as you approach life after treatment for breast cancer. If you would like a free copy just follow the link below where you can order one to be posted out to you. I hope you find it useful.
Best wishes,
Jo, Facilitator
Thanks Jo.
Thankyou Jo I have sent off for my copy and thankyou D007 the article is really good.I was feeling really stuck but am beginning to see that to move on a new normal will need to be created and I will have to accept this. It’s strange but to me the mastectomy had much less of an impact than the uncertainty and fatigue. I would be really greatful for any advice of how others created a new normal I know it can’t be done overnight.I have already started to break it down into catagories work,home and me. Feeling much more positive now I am addressing the issue.
Went for some saline for expander implant on Friday.Nurse asked consultant to take a look. They both decided that breast on the other side would need uplifting for symmetry. The breast has already been reduced and uplifted once after I had the mx. So next year it looks like I will be having the implant changed for a permanent one and the other breast uplifted. Am not looking forward to being sore both sides. Has anyone else had this done, what is the recovery time like?