Hi. So I don’t really know where to start, because at the moment I just feel a bit numb and like its not really happening. At 46 years old I found the lump, I had just started a new relationship (3 weeks before in fact) after being married for 25 years. Fast forward 2 months, 3 biopsies, MRI, scans and I now have surgery booked Lateral intercostal artery perforator (LICAP) flap breast reconstruction in 2 weeks time. My partner is still there and I do really want him to be there, but fear I may push him away, because I’m trying to hide how I really feel (not something you expect at the start of a relationship). Does anyone have any advice on new relationships post surgery? I’m guessing there will be time/difficulties getting intimate again??
Umph VCP
I’m so sorry you’re having to go through all this BC s**t. And, especially when you’d recently found a “suitable” partner.
I’m sooo glad he’s “still” there for you, at this point, and soo hope he remains so. But. . . if you feel you have to “hide” your feelings, you aren’t being TRUE to your self or the relationship? Yes, you are basically “protecting” him. It’s a huge “test” really, isn’t it? With something so serious as what you’re going through, right now, if you told him your “True” feelings, and he walked away? Was he right for you in the first place?? HOWEVER, if you DON’T “hide” your feelings, tell him of them, and he still “wants” to stay around, WANTS to be there FOR YOU?? Then I’d say, a BRILL guy to have in your life.
Hope it turns out to be the latter of the two, VCP. I lost a few, so called “friends”, in my BC experience! All certainly sorts the wheat from the chaff, in ones life! Sometimes with SAD results.
Hope ALL goes well with your Op, VCP. Lotsa love, Delly-welly XX