Life is just not fair!!
Life is just not fair!! Hello
This is my first time to this forum but spent a lot of time on the DCIS one as suffered from this, had a mastectomy & recon and still struggling on. Anyway this is not about me - I went with my mum yesterday to be told she has bc and has to have a mastectomy on 11th July. They are not sure till they do the op if she will have to have chemo or radiotherapy yet but fingers crossed. I lost my dad 16 years ago this month to cancer - he has three brain tumors by the end of it and although they gave him 3 months he fought on for 7 years with lots of radium and chemo.
I’m not sure I am strong enough to deal with this again…I am an only one and mum is all I have left. I feel terrified, scared, sick, angry and upset and want to be strong for her. It brings back too many memories for me both of what I went through (added to which I have another op to face on 6th July) and loosing my dad.
I feel I should be able to cope better than most as I know what she is going through but that’s the problem. I really must have p*****ed someone off in a previous life to have both parents develop cancer.
Sorry to rant but I am sitting here trying to stop crying and feeling sorry for myself but even more so for poor mum. LIFE IS PANTS!!!
Deb
SO SORRY oh Debs
What a lot you have been and still are going through, my thoughts are with you and your mum and am sending you a handful of strength to get you through this awful time. Know how you feel, you end up blaming yourself as I have, for being this crap hand of cards of life.
Take care
Elaine
Hi , i feel the same way!.. I was diagnosed with BC in Oct 2006, last radiotherapy day mother diagnosed…me 41 her 66…and dad had prostate cancer died suddenly at 66 , 5 years ago as a result of treatments…Yes life is very unfair!..my mum was caught early, no lump to be felt, but the strange thing is we are both HER pos, so reliving the FEC…cant believe it, as we have had no family history. Im divorced with 2 daughters, so worried, also mum in law died of BC…But anger doesnt help…you need to face it and get on with it…but hey ive got a date tomorrow night, he doesnt know im still wearing a wig lol!
I agree anger doen’t get you far but at the moment its what I feel. I now have found out that poor mum will probably have to have chemo and rad as well. She’s only 67, I’m 42 and my dad died aged 54…PANTS!!!
Hope the date goes well ginjill…never mind about the wig I’m sure you will look wonderful.
Lol
Hello Debs
I’m desperately sorry for what you are going through at the moment, I don’t know if this will make you feel any better but I really do know what you’re going through. My mum and Dad both lost very brave battles against cancer of different types. It really hurts like hell even though it was 11 years ago for mum and 7 years for dad. Yes life is PANTS, down right bloody cruel really but no you didn’t p***** someone off in a previous life you just got dealt a bad hand like me!!! I have been in remission for 18 months now and when ever I think of ma and pa I stick 2 fingers up in the air and say to myself if they could go through all that with such dignity then I can do the same!!!
Take a big deep breath, scream if you want to, but remember you will always have the ladies here to help you whenever you want it.
Lots of love and cuddles
Binner xxx
Hi Deb
I am so sorry to hear about your mum and dad and listening to what you have said about your dad he was a fighter and that is what you and your mum will be, please try to look forward and not back, like you have said you have already done it and I guess you could write the book, but you were strong then otherwise you wouldnt be here now, I am sure you will both be fine as you have each other to get you through this and meds keep advancing all the time…
a big hug and cuddle to you both and my very best wishes
Love Lucy
XXXXXXXXX
you cant be strong all the time luvvy, please give yourself a break and a big pat on the back for being such a survivor!! your mom is lucky she has SUCH a strong daughter who loves her and is clearly going to be there to hold her hand every step of the way!!
*BIG HUG*
xxx