To cut a long story short. I was dx last Jan with grade 3 ductal carcinoma aged 28, no lymph involvement, chemo x 6, rads x 16. Mum also dx 1 week after me with exactly the same.
All is good apart from the fact I saw my surgeon yesterday and he said if I carry the faulty gene he would be more than happy to give me a bilateral mastectomy and ovary removal.
I was quite hoping to try for a baby with my new hubby of two months and he said I could try after 2 years of dx (this dec) but the cancer may return or I could wait five years but by then the chemo could’ve put me into early menopause and i’d have no hope.
What do you do ?
My hubby is insistent that I go 5 years.
To top it all off I have been out of work since Oct 07 due to the cancer and my benefits (family credit) have now stopped as I am now married (i’ve been married 2 months).
My hubby works miles away and the increase in petrol is costing us a fortune and I don’t know what to do.
I’ve hit the bottle today and had half a bottle of vodka which is completely out of charecter for me and I can’t stop crying.
Oh Mandy, I am so sorry. I’ve only just joined this and have been dealing with my breast cancer since Feb 2008 and think I’m just coming to terms with it hence the reason for joining. I don’t have any words of wisdom but just wanted to say something to you after reading your story. I myself am on family credit and have stopped working since Feb and it is a bit of a hassle dealing with all the money worries aswell as what you’re going through. You’ve got to trust your gut instinct with trying for a baby cause you can go through life wondering what if what if, but like I say I’m not an expert on giving advice but I just wanted to say hi and wish you all the best and send a really big hug to you and your family. Isobel xox
I’m not sure that I can help answer you as my situation is not the same as yours. I am 32, was diagnosed last year but already have 2 children so I cannot relate to the way you are feeling. I never post on here, I just read the posts but felt I had to write something to you while you are waiting for other more helpful replies because you sound so upset!
Anyway, don’t think that’s of any help really but just sit tight and wait for some advice from other forum users and in the meantime don’t be upset, things will work out.
Dear Mandy
So sorry to hear of your story.
I have no experience of any of these things apart from the bc, but send you a big hug and hope others can be of more help to you.
With Love
xx
I have just read your post and can relate to you situation a little. I am 6 months post treatment. I was dx last march with BC, grade 3. I had 6 FEC followed by 33 rads. 2 years before my lovely Mum had BC and is now 3 years on.
i was 26 when dx.
I to had fertility concerns and before i started chemo I had a course of IVF to preserve my eggs/embryos.
Now i am haveing tests for the faulty gene, luckily enough we do not carry the BRACA 1 gene so we do not have to think too much about masectomies and ovary removal.
I understand how you must feel, this s****y disease turns your life and plans upside down.
Can you talk to your onc/BC nurse about fertiltiy treatment?
I think I remember the onc saying that I would not need to ti=hink about masectom and/or ovary removal till about the agge age 35. but that was just with me.
i really think you should chat with them and maybe you will find son=me answers.
i really wish you all the best
Hiya Im so so sorry for your problems. I really dont know what to say too much but I do no how horrible it feels when you feel so down. I have similar issues, I lost my husband 5 years ago when I was 30, i was just coming rounds and then this happens - due to possiblity of faulty gene, I am underway with chemo and due to family history have already got an appointment to discuss overy removal - i was devastated as I feel I wont have kids ever or find someone whos willing to take on me with the masectormy and such not. However, I cant really give you much advice but in my case as the cancer was hormone sensitive it was wiser for me to have overies removed so Im trying to accept this and deal with it.
Hope your specialists can help you to weigh things up - at the end of the day I said toi them I wanted to do everything I possibly could to increase my odds.
Hope the head isnt hurting too much and you get the help and support you need - some days its seems so bleak but maybe tomorrow will be slightly better for you
hi…there…i know how it felt to be worried…i was diagnosed in 2002 at the age of 22 and was already married for 2 years…i had a baby in 2005…and was diagnose with reccurence the same year…my pregnancy was given a green light due to my negative results of both hormon receptors…i know you will find the best answer for yourself…have faith…every thing will be alright… i never regrated giving birth to my beautiful girl…because i knew the risk and it was fine for me…yes i was sad…as i am also human but when i know that there is a reason the almighty Allah gave this fate to me, i can accept it…at least there’s a baby girl brought into the world by me to a company my husband when i’m not around…but you never know when god will take you…He may even spare me 50 years if he wants to…even the fitters person can be taken by him any time…i hope you won’t worry much just take things step by step…and it will come through just fine…make sure the decission is done by you and nobody else…because i think you will be able to except the outcome whatever it is if you know the risk and made the decission yourself. But in making decissions it is nice to talk to someone who might be effected by it in your case it will be your husband…i know you’ll make the right one…
sorry for the long post, once i start writing i can’t stop…
It sounds like you’re having a pretty tough time at the moment, maybe it would help to talk this through with someone from the BCC helpline. Here you are are able to share your fears and concerns with one of our trained members of staff who can offer you a ‘listening ear’ as well as advice and extra support if needed. The number is free phone 0808 800 6000 and the line is open Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm and Saturdays 9am to 2pm.
Just wanted to say good luck to you all, really moved by reading all your tales.
Am 28, diagnosed 3 months ago, mastectomy, horrible infection, removal of implant, start chemo a week today. Mum got the 5 year all clear from DCIS last October.
Am finding facing the fertility issues difficult. Always knew I wanted kids, but not right now! Being forced to think about kids when single and sick is scary!! My attitude is that if I can’t have my own with a partner then there is always artificial, if artificial not an option then there are lots of children out there that need a mummy and so be it!
Please keep smiling and know that we’ll all make it.