Mum is coming home today! The hospital are so pleased with her. They said they can’t believe that just 48 hours after major surgery she is up and about and doing so well.
I do wish they were keeping her in a bit longer as she still has three drains in and she will have to go back on Monday to have them removed.
I am also worrying about the journey home as it takes nearly an hour and is through country lanes so will be very bumpy and with all those stitches it will be quite uncomfortable.
Hopefully today she will have her outpatient appointment date. I am dreading that as we will find out how much cancer there is and if they have the correct margins. My dad did ask them if they had any idea by looking at what they had taken out, but the doctor said there is no way of knowing what is cancer and what isn’t unless you look under a microscope as its just cells. I remember when I had my lump removed I kept hoping the doctor would be able to give me an indication but his words were, I don’t want to lead you on with false information, when a lump is removed only a biopsy will tell you, as to a naked eye it is just alot of cells. You would hope wouldnt you that they could tell something by looking at it, but I guess thats just our wanting to know things quickly. Why oh why can’t there me a quick way of knowing, al we seem to have done this year is wait for results.
I have been to next today and bought mum some nice toiletries. I just want to spoil her so much. We are probably going to pop over later if the journey has not tired her out. We are going to have a tough job ahead with her as she is not one for taking to her bed, even when she is really ill. Mind you little lolly is another one who was being super women and doing too much too quickly bless her (hope your ok lolly sweetheart and are having a good weekend)
Update
Dad has just rung, shes home so we are popping over at two for an hour. The doctors told her she could go home if she promises to rest and not do a thing.
Been over to see mum and she was sitting in the kitchen looking very perky and cheery. I really don’t know how she does it. She even went outside (against my better judgement) to get me a cake she had baked from the freezer in the garage as we have friends coming over tonight. I am amazed at her progress, its two days since major surgery and shes walking around as normal. I hope she can beat this cancer, as the thought of loosing her is intolerable and I really cant bare the thought of not having her in my life. (I know I go on about her, but it helps to express my feelings on here)
You ladies are all the same on here, amazing, you cope so well with so much and with such dignity.
Thank you again for all your good wishes, on here whispered and also on facebook, it really means alot to me and I have passed your good wishes on to mum.
Thanks sweetie, I feel like I am mum now!! Definite role reversal.
You are such a kind caring person Mel, and I am so proud and honoured to have you as my friend. I hope we get to meet up one day as your an inspiration you really are, and I know I have said it a few times, but I was overjoyed with your good news Friday, fingers crossed things continue for you sweetie.
I hope anybody who is having the kind of surgery mum has had can take some comfort in it wasn’t as bad as it seemed. There were other ladies in the ward and they were all coping remarkably.
Chrissie - thanks for sharing your story about your Dad with us - sounds like he was a fantastic person. I think if nothing else it shows that people should be encouraged to get active and do stuff rather than sit in a chair in the corner being papmered and they will reap the benefits. It seems that your father deteriorated after your mother started to molly-coddle him, no disrespect to your mother, and she probably thought she was doing the best for him. My friend’s father had a stroke a few years back and fell into the feeling sorry for himself state - he was capable of doing some stuff but more capable of playing the ‘sick man’ and allowing others to do stuff for him. Unfortunately due to his lack of co-operation he has lost the ability to do a lot of stuff and his life is very limited now.
Jules - glad your mum is through her operation and is home. Hope she gets good results.
hi jules .so glad your mum is home and up and about ,but try and see she dosnt do too much too soon ,as its very tempting when youve been in bed for a few days to want to get on with things ,i think her body will tell her to slow down ,she has been through a major op so needs to take thinga slowly no matter how hard she wants to be doing things herself.i know i was the same after mine ,and my daughters were behind me all the time trying to get me to slow down ,i did in the end but not without a fight !! lets hope she continues to do well .take care speak soon lynn xx
I’d like to reiterate what Aroma has said about trying to do too much. I had bilaterals and recon Monday, wasn’t very well and needed two blood transfusions during the course of my stay, then came out of hospital Friday, was visiting my Sister’s house Sunday, pottering around doing the odd thing, talking to neighbours thinking I was fine. By Tuesday I was being hauled into A & E with huge infection and was in hospital for 9 days, and lost my implants. You feel great just getting the op over with, and if you don’t feel too bad, you tend to think you can just go straight back to normal, but you have to be careful. Nothing’s as bad as it seems if it all goes according to plan, but you can’t take anything for granted and always need to take your time after any major surgery, otherwise problems can set in.
Hi jules,
Glad your mum is home…just got to try and get her to take it easy for a while now…she’ll soon learn her limitations I’m sure.
Speak to you soon.
Thanks Aroma, Lilac, Julie and Karen for your good wishes and warnings re mum!
I am worried now, especially with what you have said Julie. Trouble is she is always like it, she would have to be literally on her last legs before she took to her bed.
You should have seen her trying to get in the garage with her drain bottles in a these little bags, I ask you…!! I was also worried because she had to go past a bush with thorns and she has been warned about being careful not to cut or scratch the arm because of lympodema. My dad has assured me she will doing absolutely nothing, and knowing how much my dad loves mum and how devastated he would be if anything happened to her, he will make damn sure she rests. He stands over her every night to make sure she takes her Letrozole. The reason being is not that she doesnt want to take it, but the side effects have been quite nasty at times, and he was worried she might skip the odd night!
I think tomorrow it will probably hit her more and she will probably sleep alot. My dad has to measure the blood in her drains every day and ring the hospital and let them know.
Thank you again for your good wishes, and for reading my ramblings. It really helps me having this thread to write and talk about mum as it its kind of like a diary and a place to express my worries and thoughts. Thank you so much for taking the time to ask about mum and caring how she and I are, its really appreciated.
Its really good to hear that your mum is doing so well, she is very lucky to have you and your dad, you are obviously very close and supportive and its lovely to hear that things are working out for you, She sounds like a very strong woman and I know that you are very very proud of her. She must be just as proud of you too, you have been through alot these last few months, so I think that some of your mums qualities have rubbed off.
I wish you both all the luck in the world for her results.
Take care of yourself and fingers crossed the worst is over.
I am feeling very positive about things tonight. One being that mum seems to be doing well, two I have had white wine and friends round this evening, and three that I have made so many lovely friends from this site on facebook. You are all such stars and have been a great support to be over the last few months, so thank you so much.
Sorry Jules, don’t mean to try and worry you unnecessarily, but just to be aware and to make sure she takes care. Hopefully she will sail through it, but we’re all the same, we tend to think we’re invincible, and especially once you get through the nitty gritty of a big op, and you start to feel better, you do start to relax and want to get back to normal. It’s only natural that she wants to get on and also she will be trying to prove to you all that she’s managing and doesn’t need looking after. She will not want any of you to worry. We’re all the same as Mums, aren’t we. I think it just comes with the territory. Just remember it’s usually the first two weeks after surgery where you’re at risk from infection.
Julie hunny, you didnt, you have been really nice and caring with your posts and also given me lots of useful information regarding mum. So thank you for that. Mum needs to be kept in check lol and she will be told!!
I know exactly what you mean about infection post op. I had major surgery in 2003 and I became very ill after four days, could not even stand up and in the end could not even keep any water down. Hubby got the emdocs to come out as I couldnt even stand, let alone get in the car and it turned out I had a very nasty kidney infection. You know where it changes on the papers I was about nine down (black or something) where it was changing (hope that makes sense). He said I was literally only an hour or so away from being admitted to hospital and put on intravenous antibiotics, and how common is was to get an infection like that after surgery and how dangerous an infection like that was as it could kill you if you didnt seek treatment. He gave me an injection of antibiotics and also some tablet ones to take there and then (double dose) and I can tell you within a few hours the change in me was amazing, so yes your absolutely right. I did remind mum of my infection yesterday so will keep a special eye on her.
I think half the reason she is being like it as you have said, its about being mum, and protecting your children no matter how old they are by seeming to cope and get better quickly to stop them worrying! But it has the reverse effect!! Thankyou for caring Julie, its appreciated.
Maximise
Thank you for your good wishes and for being such a good friend. I really appreciate the support you have given me and thank you for listening to me rambling on last night on facebook lol it was lovely to catch up and hear about your nice holiday.
I have not rung mum up yet as thought I would let her have a nice lie in, but will give her a call after lunch and see how she is doing. I know its daft but I want to go over and see her again!! I have seen her the last three days and normally would not see her as often as she lives about 20 miles away, but just want to see her as much as possible at the moment.
My sister is doing the race for life today in honour of our mum. I feel guilty that I have not done it with her and wish I had now. It was just when she asked me it was the time I was waitng for surgery and results etc for my lump and I was feeling pretty down about the whole cancer situation and could not face it, but next year definitely.
I know there are some ladies on here who have done the walk, well done girls.
Well done your sister for doing the race for life. I did it with my daughters this year after finding my lump, and running is one sure way to clear your head and forget about your own problems (Especially that particular race).
I don’t know about your area, but in mine you were able to register up until the last couple of days.
Still time to blow the cobwebs of your trainers maybe!
Hi there thanks Chrissie, I did not realise I could sign up so late, thats annoying I would have probably done it with sister, but I must admit I have been so pre-occupied with mums surgery this week and visiting her everything else has been a bit hazy in my life.
I felt bad as my daughter had an appointment for her depression on the same say as mum had her surgery and I was torn between hubby taking me to see mum as he was working later and I can’t drive so would not have been able to go later, or going with daughter. Daughter was fine and said granny needs you mum, you must go. I have sponsored my sister some money and I will definately being doing the race next year as its such an fantastic cause.
Really happy everything is going well for you and your mum, I know you think like most of us you have a wonderful mum but I am sure she also realises that she has a wonderful daughter in you as well.
I hope your daughter is doing well, sounds like she is if she can see the problems granny has as well. It is always a good sign when people with depression recognise others problems.
Thanks Chrissie for telling us about your Dad - wow what a guy - I was so impressed about the marathon!
Jules - so pleased that you Mum is not only home but looking perky! It will make you feel better.
I have just been to visit my Mum - obviously after only 5 days since surgery she is not allowed to drive. I pulled up and the car has gone. And so has my sister who is visiting from Germany! Talk about Thelma and Louise. Naughty is just not in it anymore, but it makes me feel good to know she is so much better.
Just need to see how many lymph nodes are affected - oh well that will be another hurdle. Nothing that we cant handle.
I have signed off work for 2 weeks now. I cant face work at the moment. Despite feeling strong most of the time every so often it creeps up on you - the tears and the anxiety of what the future holds. BUT at the moment, with the way Mum is doing and all the fantastic people of here all is OK.
I did the Race for Life this year too - we were waiting for the results of wether Mum had breast cancer or not, and I thought I am not stopping unless I collapse! I managed to run it without stopping and I know its only 3.1miles but it was great to be running for such a good cause in the pouring rain. Maybe a marathon next…
I have spoken to you on FB … once or twice!!..Lol…Ok Ok maybe more !!!
I know u have been soooooo worried about ur mum, but hey she sounds like a strong woman to me hun, she doesnt sound as if she will listen to any docs telling her to rest. Sounds like the kind of woman who will do exactly as she wants … Go on!!! …
This is the kind of woman who will not let a thing like BC beat her…She sounds like a brilliant woman mate just like her daughter…