Hello
My mum was diagnosed two days ago with grade two invasive lobular breast cancer, we now are waiting for all the pre surgery tests and to discover what stage she is at. Everything I have read feels contradictory and confusing, on the one hand the stats seem to indicate a very high recovery / survival rate and yet also state that women with this disease are generally staged at a higher stage indicating spreading of the disease.
My mus is being very brave and I am so proud of her, she is in her 70’s quite sprtiely and active, but she is quite frail in herself and I am worried about how she will cope with chemo, surgery etc, she has a heart condition and other health issues. I am trying to be positive for her, but inside I feel afraid and have no idea how to hel her through this. I have very little support as we dont really have much family. I don’t live very close to her and she wants to stay in her own home. I am terrified she is going to die and I know that is a possibility, but then I see women on forums who are 10 years on and were staged a 3.
xx
Dear Jemimah,
Oh my dear, here’s a big hug. Now take a deep breath. You and your mother can get through this! This is the worst time, between diagnosis and action, we are all agreed on that, no matter what our diagnosis or stage or eventual treatment. The docs will tailor her treatment plan to her state of health- there is so much they can do and, as my own gp said to me, these days chemo is so much more doable–she may find it much easier than either of you are imagining. During treatment she will be constantly watched and evaluated. I think there is every chance she may be able to stay at home.
It is lovely that she has someone like you who cares about her so much. There is a Breast Cancer Care helpline–if you are feeling frightened or lost it can REALLY help to call it. We’re also here, if you have questions, concerns or just want to RANT!!
Here’s another hug!
x
Hi Jemimah and welcome to the BCC forums
Along with the valuable support here, as Quail has kindly suggested, our helpliners are on hand too on 0808 800 6000, lines are open 9-5 weekdays and 10-2 Saturday
I am posting alink to the BCC ‘Just diagnosed’ page where you will find lots more support ideas for you and your Mum along with information which you may find useful:
Take care
Lucy
Ah Jemimah
Big hugs - my mum was diagnosed a month ago. We get her results tomorrow to see what next. I know how you are feeling - it’s only me and my mum, and then my 93 year old pap (her dad) who doesn’t know yet. Based on our last month, the waiting is the worst part - I was fine when mum was in for her op, quite cheerful in fact as it was another thing ticked off the list. Today I just want to cry - bit embarrassing when I’m at work…!
Thank you for your replies and I send love and hope to all of you. Yes I think the not knowing exactly what we are dealing with is making it harder to face. I had a bad day yesterday, today I feel better, but have a knott in my stomach that churns away even when I am telling myself everything is going to be ok. She is putting on a brave face and a real fighting spirit and I am proud of her. I am doing my best to follow her lead and keep things as normal as possible. I just wish they would do all the tests for these women and results within days not weeks. its like slow torture having to wait weeks.
xx