Mum recently diagnosed at 49

hi my mum told me a few days ago that she has breast cancer, she’s been diagnosed 6 weeks, but she says she’s known for about 6 years, but obviously went in to denial :frowning: she’s just had 10 days of radiotherapy and is on tamoxifen , the thing that worries me the most is that the cancer as literally eaten her whole breast away so basically given itself a masectomy and is now just an open wound the docs have saistorage striven positive, she’s young at just 49 and is being very positive about the whole thing, which is good but I feel like after leaving it so long that the damage is done, I no I shouldn’t think that and I hope I’m wrong. I’m 25 mum of 3 and nits been a massive shock to us all xxx

Oh my love you must all be so shocked I can only offer you a friendly ear if you want to talk your mum has at least now sought help and must have had her reasons for not doing so sooner knowing she has a supportive family will be a great help believe me now she’s in the care of the medics they I’m sure will do all they can to help and this site and the macmillan site are are great source of info feel free to drop by anytime hun my hugs are with you and your family stay positive I know it’s not always easy!! :))

Hi

I am so sorry to read your mum’s story. I’m so glad she eventually got help and treatment for her cancer. Wishing you both all the best and sending (((BIG HUGS))) to you.

Poemsgalore xxx

So sorry to hear about your mum’s diagnosis - my thoughts are with you and her. I was 49 at diagnosis and one thing that has struck me is how well the body can heal and now that she is receiving treatment she can start to do that. I am sure the doctors will keep a close eye on her and ensure that she progresses well. All the best to you, your family and your mum.

Hi elieac

I’m sorry to read about your Mum’s diagnosis. As well as the support you recieve here if you need to talk things through do give the BCC helpline a call on 0808 800 6000. Here you can share your feelings and concerns with someone who will offer you emotional support as well as practical information. The lines are open Monday to Friday 9 to 5pm and Saturday 10 to 2pm.

Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator

Hi,
I know what your going through, my mum was 47 when she was diagnosed and it’s a big shock at first but you do learn to live with it honest it does get easier, she is now 55 and still going strong.
You just need to be their for her and be strong at all times I know it can be hard but you’ll get there.
If youd like a chat then plz feel free too at anytime.
Big hugs xxxx

Hi Ellie,
I am so sorry to read of your mum’s diagnsois. I must admit I was drawn to the thread by her age - as I was 47 at diagnosis, so wasn’t really expecting to read that she had lived with this for so long without any support or medical help. I don’t know if this will help, but I have a friend whose mother did the same, albeit she was a much older lady than your Mum (in her late70s/ early 80s). She, too had drugs and radiotherapy and went on to live a happy, healthy life for about five years unitl ‘old age’, not cancer, took her away.

Staying positive is definitely a good thing, and the doctors will do everything they can for you Mum to get her well again. She may well be feeling guilty that she didn’t do anything sooner - but that actually won’t help, and can’t change anything now. The importnat thing is to concentrate on the ‘now’ and take whatever help is offered. Make sure that you get good support too - try BBC helpline or speak to MacMillan.

Best wishes for all of you, and a gentle hug,

Hi Ellis,
I am 45 and have been recently diagnosed with bc b and it is a difficult thing to get your head round. I can see it from both sides as I checked myself as my mum was diagnosed at the end of March. So I am a daughter of a mum with BC and a daughter with BC. No one knows why your mum didn’t say anything but I am sure she must of been scared or possibly in denial. I hope you mum confides in you now that she has told you as I have found talking to people can lighten the load.

hugs for you both
Xx

So sorry this has happened to your mum, and at such a relatively young age too! It must be a huge shock to you. Unfortunately it is not unknown for people to take an ostrich type attitude, and I guess her outcome will depend on how much it might have spread, if it has. Will your mum allow you to go with her to appointments so you can get the full story of what is going on?

They are able to manage many advanced breast cancers these days, even if they might not be able to “cure” it, and there might be different treatment options to discuss, which she might allow you to participate in.

I am glad she is being open about it now with you. I’m sure she will appreciate your support. Blessings to you both and to your family … xxx

Hi Ellie,I too was 49 at diagnosis,that was nearly 3 years ago,all is good now and its my family and friends support which got me through it so just be there for your mum,your support will be invaluable,best wishes to you,your mum and family,
Di.x

,

hi ellis im a mum of two boys 23 and 26 . i was diagnosed with bc on 17th may i was 47 now 48 as had recent birthday. Got surgery 18th june (first one) another to come and chemo and r therapy. I know you must be very scared i am too , but i now realsie theres hundreds of us out there all walking down the same scary road. Your mums lucky shes got you and the breast care team are there to support you as well as your mum. I imagine your mum had her own reasons for not chasing it up sooner but treatment is there for her now. It sounds like your close and i hope you can help each other. take care and support each other sending big hug.

Thank you everybody fear all you very kind words, I’ve just realised that the computer changed my spelling I was ment to put its estrogen positive! Mum has now decided to move abroad as she says the heat makes get feel betteshe since having the cancer she has alot of fluid in her lungs she’s had them drained but she sounds so husky, I just hope this isn’t a sign that is spread,she’s coming back to the uk the middle of August to see the consultant and I guess they will scan her again? I however have been referred to a genetic specialist in Birmingham to see what my chances are of getting it aswell x

yes, big hugs. I am only 46 and feel too young to have this. I was diagnosed only 2 weeks ago after finding a lump. My daughter is only 15 and this is hardest on her. Awful time for all the family, but I feel it will make us stronger and we are positive (most of the time!)

Mel