Found out yesterday that my mum has BC (she’s 52) , waiting until next Wednesday for biopsy results and where they’ll do all scans to see if it’s spread. They told her it has not spread to the lymph nodes.
No one in the family has ever had any type of C, so I’m a bit scared and don’t quite know how best to support my mum. I feel useless! But want to be as strong as I can. Any tips?
I found this website last night, thank goodness for the internet! 
xx
Hello cerigrafucancr
Welcome to the forums. I’m sorry to hear of your mums diagnosis, this must be a very difficult time for both of you.
As well as the support you and your mum will receive on the forums you might find it helpful to order the BCC resources pack. It has been specifically designed for those newly diagnosed and contains information to help you understand the diagnosis, test results and the various treatments available. If you would like to order a copy just follow the link bellow:-
You or your mum may also like to talk things through with one of the helpline staff, they are there to offer emotional support as well as provide information. The free phone number is 0808 800 6000 and lines are open 9-5 Monday to Friday and 10-2 Saturday.
Best wishes
June, moderator
Cerigratucancr,
I just needed my daughter to be with me, hold my hand when I needed it and generally just be there. It was Ok just to sit quietly together and OK for me to cry without being told that it would be OK and stop crying.
She just allows me to be in the moment but she watched me closely at first, but then has encouraged me to see friends and taken me out for lunches. She made sure that there was food in the fridge, a clean house, fresh sheets and a cup of coffee for any visitors after surgery.
Just be guided by your Mum, hold her hand; you sound lovely and caring and often that is enough
Jan x
Hi cerigrafucancr
I know it’s scary for you but the best thing you can do is just be there for your Mum.
I’m only recently diagnosed (and no-one in our family has had bc either) but my daughters have really been supportive. My youngest daughter told me I could ring her any time, day or night, if I was feeling upset or scared…when she was a teenager we really didn’t have a good relationship so it just goes to show. I’m also getting lots more hugs off them all which is really appreciated. My second daughter came with me when I went to get the results of the biopsy. They’ve all bought me flowers too to cheer me up.
You sound a really caring daughter and I’m sure your Mum will appreciate whatever you do. Little things such as hand holding or hugs mean a lot.
Has your Mum joined the forum? It’s made a big difference to me to be able to chat to others going through the same thing.
Love and hugs
xxx