My mum is so brave

Hi all,

I am new to this forum so I do apologise if I have done this the wrong way. I have been reading so many stories on this forum which has come at a great comfort. My mum has been diagnosed in the last few weeks with a quite an aggressive form of breast cancer. I must admit I don’t know what stage but the nurses do say she is very complex. I live in London while she is back home up north. I have spoken to her everyday and I can say I am extremely proud with how she is dealing with it.
My reason for posting was that not to be too blunt but things just got real. She explained to me all the process that she is going to go through and think she is quite well prepared. I just want to feel like that I am doing my bit for her albeit the 200 mile gap. I sent flowers to her but want something that will be more beneficial please help! :slight_smile:

Hi Monty87, I think just the calls you are making makes your mom feel she isn’t going through this alone, I too have this horrible illness and going through chemo at the moment so understand how your mom feels. She sounds organised and ready for what is to come over the next few years, if it was me I would like some really nice skin care products.  She can then feel a little better in herself with Decleor/Elemis I know a little pricey but well worth every penny just to feel special.  I wish both you and your mom all the best and keep positive, you’ll both get through this together. Best wishes Snapper58

That’s a nice thought…depends on what she is having done and what sort of things she likes…

Lovely loose soft hooded furry type of fleecy zip up top - the type that makes you feel a bit like you are being hugged whenever you put it (needs to be quite loose near armpit and across boob/s)
Soft knitted poncho - because of the way you throw part of it over your shoulder it seemed to encourage people to give you more space - reducing the risk of being knocked when its sensitive. Also very easy soon after op when you can’t lift your arm very far at all if any surgery has been carried out underarm.
Foot/hand creams - though not sure if chemo may affect what you can use - ok re radio
A soft lovely colour of wide scarf to throw over a loose top to provide a degree of camouflage while recovering, preferably in soft cotton.
Possibly during recovery offer of a reflexology session etc somewhere close to home without having to worry about transport since fatigue may be an issue for a while.
If your mother does gentle yoga that’s great for later phases of recovery - may be something there
An all organised weekend away with you or a close friend planned at a later stage in treatment…somewhere where she can take it easy but be out and about a bit as a break from being at home recovering.

Perhaps not the most exciting - but may be worth mentioning to your mum - a really really soft towel which can be used as a prop in bed since sometimes it can hurt to roll on eg your side etc in the first few days after surgery - bizzarely I also found a small torch helpful since I couldn’t easily reach the bedside light switch for a week or so after the op but again more something it may be worth mentioning to your mum - rather than as a present!
Hope that sparks a few ideas for things your mum may like/find useful