well heres how it goes following examination to determine whether I am burning or not:
“how are you feeling today?”
“very tired, a bit low, carnt walk, and aching all over”,
“Oh yes, thats to be expected, the ses of the tax, it could take a few months to recover, and of course you will feel tired from the radiotherapy, I will give you some spray for your chest to ease the burning sensation, have a blood test today before you go home oh and I will do you a referral for some psychiatric therapy”
well how very dare he lol, as if I need any head work following all the c**p I have just endured,
its as if he was just following a written list he never even lifted his eyes of the paper, grrrrrrrrrr, every time I see the man he just winds me up even more than the time before,
Less than sensitive, Liz, but do take him up on the therapy he suggested. I think it hits most of us when active treatments come to an end, so take the opportunity to help yourself find your new normal when your rads finish.
(But what a way to say it, did he miss the “make eye contact” lesson when he was training?)
lIZ, just wondering why didnt you tell him how you feel or write and tell him. Im afraid im outspoken and look them straight in the eyes and tell it as it is. Im sure you get more respect from them and they realise you are actually human. My surgeon who was a posh toughy laughs when i see him and he says how are you keeping out of trouble?
We have a laugh and he is even thinking of having one of my pups, this is a man that could barely be troubled to speak other than to tell you the treatment you was having.
Good luck.
thanks for your comments, I will be taking him up on his offer of psychiatric help, maybe I could do with someone to talk to, and tell someone how I really feel about things, instead of trying to make out everything is ok when obviously it isnt,
going off that subject, hatty, what puppies have you got? sure I read on here you have Patterdales,
Hi Liz,
Yes i breed patterdales and patterjacks.
I hope the psychiatric treatment will help you talking to a stranger can be easier at times. I hope your confidence will build and you will have the strength to tell the old duffer onc how you really feel.
Ive seen my GP this morning and he laughs at the way ive handled my own treatment and says i make em tremble lol.
You go make em tremble and one thing you can be sure of your treatment will be the absolute best. Good luck and im around if you want to pm me. Salx
Hi Liz - sorry to hear it was such an alienating appt - but you’ve helped me; armed with Hatty’s advice I’m all set to tackle issues at my appt tomorrow - why did I have to prompt them to book the CT scan last week that would normally be booked two weeks earlier and then got only one day’s notice… grrrr but need to focus on getting treatments sorted out too so am getting verrrry tense but feel more empowered after reading this thread. I have had counselling and it has helped - as I said to my therapist - he’s paid to listen to me so I can say anything and even have a good cry if I want to as I don’t have to be “inspirational” for him!
Take care and best wishes for future appts.
omg a man for a therapist is the last thing I want, I cannot talk to a man about how having lost one breast and planning to lose the other has and will affect me,
how can a man possibly understand this from a womans point of view, it is difficult enough for a woman to understand,
I am sorry but I would refuse to speak to a bloke, I have got so much I need to say and when having a bad day so angry and frustrated with everything I sound so ungrateful, but I carnt help how I feel can I? if I carnt talk to my oh as I would like to be able to, how can I talk to another geezer lol
If you feel it would help to see a psychiatrist that is your decision, but I would be very cross if my Oncologist suggested that. As far as I’m concerned a psychiatrist deals with mental illness, and I’m not mentally ill. Having my breast removed,enduring a year of gruelling treatment, and being told I have secondary cancer in my bones so will not see my kids grow up causes me to feel sad at times (but sadness is not the same as indogenous depression).
now you put it that way I suppose it would be worth having someone who is neutral to talk to,
I think it is the frame of mind I am in after having finished my treatment,
I think it was just me that was labelling it as a mental health issue, in a way it is but then again it isnt (if that makes sense!) thanks for making me see things in a different light,
and today is another day, I feel at the moment I am going from one extreme to another, I wish I could move forward, not feeling so achey and tired etc might help, and if one of my kids tell me to “go back to bed mom if your tired” once more I think I will SCREAM…
I dont mean to sound ungrateful but I have lay in bed now watching this big tree I have outside my window go from bare branches, to buds to leaves now its in bloom! LOL
what a bitch I am (SORRY) its just a minefield of emotion at the moment, I dont understand it, but maybe as you suggest if I vent my thoughts and feelings it may help, what have I got to lose?
You’re not ungrateful at all - and certainly not a bitch either! It’s the bc that’s the bitch!!!
We’re all thinking about you - (((((((((((((here are some big, gentle hugs))))))))))))))), so take as many of them as you want. Don’t think I’ll run out of them, but there are others who will be long to give their lovely words of support too.
If and when you want to, give the hosp a ring about some sort of emotional support from them. Norberte’s described it really well, and has made me think too, as I’ve had one appt with a psychologist, and could have had more if I wanted. I can refer myself back to her any time. Guess I’ve viewed the psychologist as “well I’m not mentally ill”, but actually she was really helpful. Someone similar to her may just be who you need right now - but please keep posting on here too!
It’s easy to get hung up on the labels that are given to different types of support. There are many diff kinds out there and it’s not a ‘one size fits all’.
Just think of all the emotions that you’ve been through over the past months - BC messes with your head as well as your body, if help is on offer to put things into context and develop coping strategies for when things seem a bit overwhelming (and hiding under the duvet and having a good cry is a very useful one) why not give it a go?
I’ve posted under the ‘after treatment is over’ section - there’s a U-Tube link on ‘Stop It therapy’ that may raise a smile.