well im new to the forum, and thanx for making me feel welome.
its all a bit daunting, and im still taking in and understanding all what ive been told. 2 months ago i found a lump. and as my mom had been diagnosed with BC in dec i got it checked. they thought scar tissue but 8 biopsys later proved otherwise. i was down to have a part o my wondpipe removed 2 weeks ago, as i cant breath proply so they managed to get in 2 surgeons and do me two operatins at the same time.
im 41, never had kids, 2 weeks ago had a lumpectomy, and reconstrucion, invasive ductual carcinoma, 6 nodes removed all clear. lump was 21mm, not spread. grade 3, not even stage 1, all cancer removed, hormone receptor is weekly postive. HER 2 Postive but they are rechecking.
going to have 6 sessions of cemo followed by 3 weeks of rads.
what scares me, being sick and not in control. but the biggest fear is my hair loss. how wil i be able to look peopel i care about in the eye, i feel imperfectand like ive let peopel down… is that mad. ?? im 41, and feel 21 so who has this happened.
i wil cope and i will deal with it, just feels like i have a massive lonely road to walk.
sorry you have had to join us. What you are feeling is exactly how i felt when i was diagnosed in March, so you are definitely not alone. I too feel like I have let my family down, have somehow failed bu letting myself develop breast cancer and am embarrassed about it. However, I only feel like that every now and again now, whereas back in march i felt it constantly. I guess we just slowly adapt and reconcile ourselves to our diagnosis and our new world.
I too had a lumpectomy, 6 cycles of chemo and now am partway through radiotherapy (have done 11 of 19 sessions). I hated feeling ill on chemo but it wasnt for the whole time, just a bad week for me then could get back to more normal life. I adapted to hairloss much more easily than i expected to, and maybe if you use the coldcap during your chemo you may keep a good head of hair, many ladies on here have had great success with it,
All the best with your treatment, keep posting,
i had long curly thick hair which i adored and it was always a statement of me people used to describe me as the one with amazing hair people used to stop me in the street and ask if my hair was naturally curly and comment on how amazing it was - i was my hair! Breast cancer has made me realise that i am more than my image and with or without my hair i am the same person and people love me for who i am and you will feel the same i am sure
the only person that could not cope with the change of my image was my husband who i felt could not handle the way i looked anymore he did not complement me like my family and friends did and now we are no longer together!
sorry to hear yoru not with yoru partner anymore.
today i went for a wig fitting, at first i got really upset, then as i tried a few more on and saw they looked ok i wasnt too bad, my partner came with me and he was joking and said get a sexy pamela anderson wig! but it looked naff. lol
i ordered a nice wig, same as my hair colour but a different style, as if it was near my own style i would keep seeing it was false, so went for a differnet.
i also brought a nice lacy sleep hat, and scarf style hat, and a hat with a flower on.
sounds like a good shopping trip out to me! Well done for tackling it.
well done Poppy I was diagnosed the same as Vickie and i have also had WLE FEC x 6 and had 8 out of 20 Rads. I was really lucky with chemo and not had too many side effects just a bit nausea ( like morning sickness) and have been able to do my normal day to day activities go out with the girls and shop( nobody noticed in our house ha ha )My hair was the biggest emotional trauma to meand i felt silly getting upset about it as i felt it was very vain of me ( which i now realise it is not )im pleased i went and sorted my wig before i started to loose my own and got a fab wig same colour and style and i felt much beter about being able to face everyone and confident with it as no-one noticed ive been abroad with it ive gone in the pool with it and wear it everyday all day ( i dont wear scarfsits not me ) i put it on like part of my make-up and i just said to my hubby the other day i cant even feel it on my head now it just feels like mine and i forget about it .My hair is starting to grow back now and remember yours will too. xxxx Julie
thanx julie . thats all nice to know,
i didnt like some of the scarfs, they just made me look like a stereotypical cancer patent. s got a fab hat for when i walk the dog.
HI Poppie, very sorry about your diagnosis and the upcoming treatment - I just wanted to add that the hats from Suburban Turban - an online shop run by young millner (is that how you spell it?) are specially made for us hairless ones and they are very stylish and wonderful comfotable and I can’t stop shopping for them!!!
I wonder what would happen to the economy if cancer was eliminated -we all seem to shop our way through it. Anyway check them out on line cos I have been stopped in the streets a few times now by people saying what a fab hat, and its made me feel much better about myself… cheers nicola
Sorry you have had to join us here - but welcome. I just wanted to ask you, as you are obviously very concerned about losing your hair, whether you have been given the option of trying the cold cap? It worked very well for me - and my wig is still sitting in the drawer where it has been since the day I bought it. Feel free to ask if you would like any info about it.
Hi all! I’m seeing my Onc in a few weeks to decide on next treatment. I had bilateral mastectomy with axillary clearance with immediate recon just over two weeks ago and am recovering well. My results were 0/18 nodes and nothing found in any surrounding vessels-two lumps of 18mm and 8mm so hopefully it’s all been cut pout but likely to have preventative chemo as am only 25 and they (and I) want to make sure they got it all! I’m 8/8 hormone pos but negative for HER2.
I’m not looking forward to chemo but am going to have a wig and clippers lined up as don’t want to lose my hair slowly! Finty-I would be grateful for more info about the coldcap - was it uncomfortable? Did your hair thin etc?
are you new to the site? I havent seen yor posts before. If you are, then there is a good thread for women in their twenties which you might like to read. There are a few 20something girls on the site. i AM 36 so young in bc terms.
Sorry to hear about your diagnosis and the treatment you have had. I have finished my chemo and am halfway through radiotherapy. Chemo was hard but i got through it and out the other end, and now it seems like a lifetime ago, even though it only ended in august.
I tried cold cap for the first cycle but didnt carry on as in the end i hated the waiting and just got on with it and cut my hair. Its like a freezing cold cycle helmet they put oin you for a while before and then through your treatment to stop the drugs getting to the hair follicles, andf therefore stopping the hair follicles falling out. Sometimes it works well, sometimes it doesnt, sometimes it drives women mad! It didnt hurt me at all by the way. And bald hasnt been too bad either, it grows back ( fingers crossed it does anyway!)
Good luck with your treatment, your post might not be seen by many as its tagged on to the end of a different thread, so if you want to say hi to everyone it may be worth doing a new thread.
Thanks Vickie! I have been around for a few weeks on the forums and have my own thread elsewhere plus been on the younger woman thread so was just joining rather than starting another new one-hope this isn’t bad forum practice?!
The more I hear about the cold cap the less I can be bothered to try it-I certainly haven’t seen that it really works for people and sounds uncomfortable! I’m (fingers crossed) waiting for a critical illness payout so planning to get a non-NHS real hair wig all lined up prior to chemo then just shave my hair asap-don’t have good condition hair anyway so don’t feel like I would be losing as much as some people go! Did your hair grow back differently Vickie? I have wavy hair so hoping I will get proper curls when it goes then comes back!
Thanks for your help! Xxx
hello ,sorry you have had to jion us here ,just to let you know i was diognosed in 2006 and had mastectomy ,chemo rads etc im now on hormone treatments and am still here to tell the tale ! ,yes its been hard and i had some bad reactions to some of the meds ,but looking back i cant beleieve how far ive come ,loosing my hair was the worse bit for me ,but now may hair is really thick again ,
i wish you well ,if i can help you in anyway just inbox me ok .xxx
my hair has only just started growing back really, not got a full covering yet, looking the same from what i can see so far! Though quite a bit of grey/white mixed with the brown, but cant blame the chemo for that as i suspect under my hair colouring it was actually that colour already!
The cold cap didnt hurt me at all, it was just a bit cumbersome and exteneded the chemo session quite a bit. Also made me feel even more of a patient somehow, as if having chemo drugs put in me wasnt enough…! It was the aftercare that did it though as i didnt wash my hair much to help it stay in, didnt brush it much and spent the entire time checking pillows, clothes etc etc for tell tale signs my hair was going to fall out. When it did get itchy and started coming out a bit, i just felt i had had enough and just wanted to sort it out, so my friend shaved it for me. Felt tons better after. I suspect i could have gone on with the cold cap and had an okish result but am still pleased i just shaved it, though am glad i tried the cold cap for the first cycle.
thanx girls for the posts.
i am very upset about the upcomming loss of my hair, eyelashes ect, and was relaly debating the cold cap, however i made the decesion today im not going to bother. i style my hair with straitners and gel and hair spray, so even if i kept soem of my hair i still wouldnt be able to style it as i do now anyay, so im just gona save myself the trauma of prolonging the cemo sessions ect
Hi Poppy and Emma,
Like Vickie and Julie, I have had chemo (FEC x 6) after a WLE in March, and am now 17/30 radiotherapy treatments down. I also was petrified of losing my hair, but found that it was not too bad, wigs are great now, and bald me was not as scarey as I had anticipated. I didn’t go out with headscarves etc as i just didn’t want to be looked at sympathetically by strangers, but I wore all the little hats at home initially, and now only if my head is cold. I finished chemo on Aug 24 and now have a 2mm dusting of fur, which looks the same colour and feels the same texture, but bit early to look for a curl! I found losing eyebrows and eyelashes harder than losing my hair actually, but the makeup bag made a big difference! Benefit does a great eyebrow thing, it looks really natural. And they were first to grow back, I don’t need nearly as much cosmetic help as I did even a week ago.
The chemo is OK really- there is a rubbish few days after it, just grit your teeth and accept all offers of practical help, but by day 4 ish you will be on the up again, and inbetween times you can have a life OK. I went on several different holidays in week 3 of chemo. Energy was only a problem with the last one really
These forums are absolutely invaluable, so bounce any concerns off us at any time, we’ve all been there before. You both sound like you have great attitudes already.
I asked my chemo nurse today why my onc doesn’t like cold cap. She is an older onc, nearing retirement and she told the nurses that in her career she has seen over twoo hundred cases of scalp mets. Just one opinion I suppose. Other onc think it is fine. Chemos may be different now from when she started. Debx
i have ordered a wig, google it, its called jordin, and is difernet from my hair, as i have mine quite messy funky when i tried a wig on that looked the same, it to me only made me more concious that it wasnt mine, so ive choosen somethink a bit differnt and longer than my hair. my partner wanted to get a pamela anderson one, lol. men eh
it seems that i already have had some great info and support form this forum, and i only joined a week ago, so thanx and its lovely to hear your all doing so well and there is a life after bc.
i am positve and iwont let it beet me, its just surreal, and my life has been changed liek i never imagined. but i willlook at what good can come out of this. xxxx
Hi poppy! I completely agree with you about trying to ‘save’ your hair-I don’t see it’s worth it-i think i may as well take control and not try and save something which will just look rubbish and won’t be stylable! You should investigate real hair wigs if you can - try looking on mynewhair.org! Trevor Sorbie (hairdresser) is the patron as I understand his sister had bc-so the site is really useful and tells you what to look for when choosing a hair/wig stylist! I have read it and found it super useful so hope you do too!
When does your chemo start? Think mine will be in about six weeks time once my scars have healed!
ill have a look , thanx emma92.
sees like we may be going through stuff at simular times then, ive added you as a contact. keep me posted how u get on xx