my SIL was diagnosed yesterday and will probably, within the week, have a mastectomy. She has an area of calcification and two tumours, as well as changes to the breast. It seems the doc knew what he would probably be dealing with after he examined her and a mamogram plus ultrasound verified it, even without the result of the biopsy which we shall get on Monday.
Given our geography, we live in oman and kind of feel out of the loop a bit so if there’s room for one more (by proxy) on the couch - can you all squeeze up a bit please.
Hopefully I’ll be able to get my SIL to join in sooner rather than later but for now its me doing all the finding out.
What started off as a routine visit to the docs because my SIL had banged her breast on the handle of the kitchen door and it was still painful a few weeks latera, has turned into something none of us could ever have imagined. She is 63 and is being seen privatetly so things are happening very quickly.
I am sorry to read of your SIL diagnosis, I am sure you will soon get lots of help and advice from the many informed users of this site.
Your SIL may find BCC’s resource pack helpful, it has been designed for those newly diagnosed. The pack is free of charge as are all our publications. If you would like a copy just follow the link below: breastcancercare.org.uk//content.php?page_id=7514
It’s always such a shock when anyone is diagnosed with BC because usually people feel so well and just don’t know there’s anything wrong with them, and you always feel well it’s probably a false alarm - as so many of these things are. I’m sure your sister in law and you will get to grips with it all. So many people come on these threads as complete “newbies” and after a very short time are posting info on to others. It’s amazing how quickly one gets to understand the jargon about dx and all the different treatments. This site is SO helpful and people are very kind in their responses and I’m sure lots of others will come on to offer advice. The good news is that your SIL will get very quick treatments because everyone on here will tell you that the waiting for results and appts is the worst thing. Best wishes to you both.
thank you ladies, the time you’ve taken to reply is appreciated.
so tomorrow she will know exactly what is happening and i’ve almost managed to convince myself the doc didn’t say the things he said. I can even imagine how embarrased I’ll be when the truth comes out tomorrow.
Sam, yes I live in Musact, maybe we know the same people
My husband is from a VERY large Omani family called Al Kindy. His Aunty does a radio show in muscat, something to do with reporting local & world economics, i think!!!
I have never been there but my 8 year old daughter went last year with my in-laws. I know that it is supposed to be an amazing place.
I have an omani husband also and I’ve lived her for 32 years.
I know the family you’ve mentioned lol.
What a small world eh
Thanks for your good wishes for today. I/we are starting to look at things as milestones - is that ok?
How do I find out via the board what she’'ll need re bras and when she’ll start wearing them etc? I know we’re probably jumping the gun due to the wound she’ll have but we’ll need to order them from the uk so the sooner we get started the better. Does she go into a first stage bra then go to a second stage etc?
If you would like to use the Ask the Nurse email service with some of the questions you and your SIL have they will be only too willing to support you both through this, as well of course as your fellow forum users who have a wealth of useful information between them!
BCC also have a telephone helpline service which you can use from outside the UK but I don’t know whether the time differences would make this a viable option for you. The overseas helpline number is (+44) 2076 200 077 lines are open Mon to Fri 9am - 5pm and Sat 9am - 2pm (UK time)
I too live in a foreign country although Spain isn’t as far away as Oman!! Your SIL is very lucky to have someone like you trying to find out all the info. This site is a lifeline to all of us. Anything that is worrying you & can’t ask the medicals in your country you will find the answer here.Good luck to your SIL & she is fortunate to have speedy service, I’ve been diax since 15th Dec & still don’t know a date for my op’ ( should have kept up my private med ins, but then I was never sick!!!) & that is the worst, the waiting!! xx
Thank you ladies for taking the time to answer and re-assure, I can’t tell you how good it was to come on and see a few more replies. And funny enough I had just got off the phone to one of the helplines but of course forgot it was sunday and that it would be closed.
Is it too early to get drunk because right now I am sitting here reeling with disbelief. We went for the results of the FNA today and although it showed cells the person in the lab doesn’t know what they are. Now I know we were told on thursday what the more than likely situation is here, I could even tell by the body language of all the people involved in the mamogram, ultrasound and the consultation in the surgeons office. I know the conversation we had with him - yet we are now told there is room for a bit of doubt/hope what bloody ever. I even whispered to him when my SIL was getting dressed - so is this at an early or late stage and he said ‘the middle’. He even told my SIL, today you cry and tomorrow you get up and start to fight.
He told us on thursday about 4 or 5 different ways just to make sure we weren’t confused as to what is probably? going on - yet we sat there today and said …well…we have to do another biopsy. The FNA isn’t backing up what can be seen on examination.
My poor SIL sat there in complete and utter disbelief, I had a bit of a panic attack and had to leave the room. I though I was going to faint. Thank god my nephews were there to help there mum though truth be told they looked like ghosts. How can you tell a person something horrible then a few days after untell it even a little bit. I could swing for the surgeon, and get this - he’s a good friend and I took her to him because I know he is good. Now I feel like a bloody nincompoop. That I have let my SIL down really badly. That she has gone through hell on earth for a few days and it could have been avoided if the surgeon had just held off telling us what he thought based on two parts of the triple test.
Of course I now know the FNA could be a false negative but even so, I just feel so sorry for my SIL and what she has gone through this last few days.
I am just so angry becuase she could have been spared this terror, yes I know what the results of the new biopsy can show but still - why couldn’t he have kept his mouth shut for a few more days.
I’m sorry, I found today more difficult than wednesday and thursday. I coped for her on those days and over the weekend but today I found it really hard, unbelievable in fact.
What a complete nightmare! Like you say, the surgeon should have waited to be absolutely sure. Your SIL must be so confused, well, you all must be. Have they done the biopsy today? When will you get the results?
I have spoken to my MIL. She said to ask your husbands family name? Do you know any of her family members well?
Take Care
Sam
P.S Its not too early to get drunk…it must be 9pm over there!!! Go for it!!
My sister in law has her op tomorrow, there is no doubt as to what she has.
Sam, we are al-mawalis and the family spent years in mombassa,I think you’re in-laws were probably somewhere on the east coast of africa as well - am I correct.
maybe we can have a natter once I’ve spoke to aunty zaina and she tells me who’s who that we know in your family. I have an idea as to who it is but just need her to confirm, it will keep her busy after the op, she loves things like this and knows most people in the world lolol
