Just had my first chemo last week. Am 37 year old Mum and still in shock from my diagnosis. All I seem to hear is that cancer always comes back and that it’s unlikely I will see my kids grow up. Are there any long term survivors out there who can offer hope? Positive stories really needed right now!
No wonder you are still in shock from your diagnosis which is probably making you think and feel the way you do now.
Many women survive long term and do not get a reoccurance. It’s also worth bearing in mind that many won’t be posting on the forum years after their treatment, since they may no longer feel the need!
Have you spoken to your oncologist about your prognosis, obviously it’s a very personal thing, we are alll individuals rather than statisitics, and type of cancer, stage, general health can all be factors.
While you are waiting to hear from long term survivors I can say I am nearly 4 years on post diagnosis (in early 40’s when diagnosed, moderate lump, had single node biopsy, not in lymph glands), no signs of reoccurance (although I had a brief scare which turned out to be old fractured ribs).
Last summer I singlehandedly laid a sandstone patio and apart from a few side effects from hormone therapy am pretty much normal *whatever that may be!). I should add I did not have chemo (they decided not in my case, but later said I was borderline re chemo).
Be kind to yourself, your first chemo, it’s natural that your mind will be spinning.
Yes, there certainly are, Katflo, & as Seabreeze says, those who are through this & getting on with life, will not usually be posting here.
Do look at this thread:
forum.breastcancercare.org.uk/t5/Coping-with-fear-and-anxiety/Where-are-the-positive-stories/td-p/1177151, especially ClaireP’s post on page 2, who was diagnosed at 28.
Also, do bear in mind that the current stats are based on data that can be 10-20 years old & things have moved on a lot since then, so outcomes are even better now.
You’ve had one of the worst shocks possible, so it would be quite usual to feel as you do at the moment.
But, there is every reason to be positive, the vast majority of us do get through it.
Thanks ladies just really struggling right now. Oncologist seems confident says they are going for a ‘cure’ and throwing everything at it. I’m just terrified as my cousin had this in her 30s and died after a recurrence within three years. I have gone on nhs predict and my stats looked really good then I read on another page on the site that they are not so accurate in women under 40! Trying to keep going as normal as possible but almost feel beaten before I’ve properly started.
So sorry to hear to hear about your cousin Kat, & of course that will affect the way you feel.
I have read as I said below, that NHS predict is based on stats that are at tleast 10 years old, so if yours are good on Predict, they can only be better now in view of more recent advances in treatment.
As your team is confident about going for a cure, then there’s every reason to be positive about it all.
Hi Katflo Just wanted to say Hi, I know it probably doesn’t help much but just wanted to let you know that I feel exactly the same.
I’m newly diagnosed and about to start chemo. Im 39 with a 7 and 1 year old and really scared about the future too. Sending big hugs xxx
Hi Dolly78 sorry you are here too. It sucks so much this whole thing as I’m sure you know. Hope you’re chemo goes ok are you getting youre before surgery? I had my first one last week and so far feel ok physically just still can’t get my head round all of this xx
I finished active treatment (mastectomy, axillary clearance & fec-t chemo) in Dec 2013
I was 49 when diagnosed.
I’m now 54, hair had grown back albeit a bit thinner than before but worth the price in my opinion, I’m back at work and I’m fitter than I was in my 40’s! I’m at the gym 5 days a week and do 2 spin classes a week!
Not gonna lie chemo was tough & probably took me a year to start to fully get over the side effects.
The steroids play havoc with your emotions, when you stop taking them your mood drops through the floor but just keep telling yourself it’s the drugs and you’ll feel better soon.
If you haven’t already join your relevant monthly chemo group in the ‘going through treatment’ section of this site - I don’t know what I would have done without their support. I’m still in daily contact with many of the women from my group.
Best of luck xx
Thanks Katflo xx it really does suck. I keep thinking I should be just worrying about things like why my 16 month old keeps throwing his food on the floor and if my 7 year olds homework is done! Not bloody cancer!! Yes I’m having chemotherapy first before surgery. They think I am a good candidate for this because of my age, the type of cancer I have, and the fact that they already know it’s in the nodes under my arm. The breast cancer nurse said to me that they want to go in hard and over do it if necessary rather than not. Hope you’re doing ok xxx
That’s great you’ve been able to work so far Katflo, how bad did you feel after the chemo? I start chemo Monday and having a massive wobble today! Just so bloody gutted about it all…I had my picc line fitted yesterday and I think that made it that little bit more real xx
I know 6 friends who have all treatment of various types
Two are 12-15yrwrs ago
One 5 years ago
Another 3 years
They have all managed to regain normality and quality of life and are mostly working etc
Hoever I feel it’s not possible to go through this all and ever feel entirely the same as it’s so traumatic to begin with but further down the line I remain hopeful when I see my friends who are now managing
That’s me on day 9 and am feeling surprisingly normal! Apart from a bit of a metallic taste in mouth and a a bit of a low mood after the steroids stopped I feel fine…so kind of dreading the side effects kicking I soon… tried the cold cap so time will tell with hair loss. The actual chemo day was ok the nurses were all lovely and they had volunteers doing teas and cakes. I cried through the first ten mins of the cold cap so a nurse sat with me, a bit embarrassing really when a much older lady beside me never batted an eyelid when hers went on! Think I was just having a bit of a melt down to be honest. It was fine after the first ten mins. Just make sure you have a tablet and some magazines as there is quite a bit of sitting around. I got a load of anti sickness, tummy meds and steroids away with me and took them all as prescribed so I’m guessing that has helped lots. You will be fine and any issues speak to the nurses they are more than capable of hand holding!x
Thanks ladies for all the positives these kind of stories are keeping me going right now
Hi i was diagnosed on the 14th of march, and looking for positive stories too. What was your diag nosis? My onco was quite positve too, but you just think the worst dont you.
Im 34 and would love to chat to someone my won age x
Hi Aimee there is a younger woman section of the forum although it tends to be pretty quiet .Breast Cancer Care also have a "someone like me " service which puts you in touch with someone who has been in a similar situation to talk and offer support .Links below .
Hi jill, thank you for your reply! I have talked to a lady on someone like me who was in the same situation as myslef at the time but not the same diagnosis.
Ive struggled most with a trace being found in my node after all scans being clear, and want to hear off others my age with positive stories.
Im not having node clearnace just radio to the area.
Why don’t you start your own thread asking for feedback from younger women who have had similar diagnosis ? It’s very hard when something unexpected is thrown up when scans have been clear .
Thanks jill, ive just started one now x
I’ve replied on your other thread - as Jill says really.
I have seen research that outcomes for those with micromets are no different to those with no node involvement, so hopefully, this is reassuring for you.
Ah right i havent read that, i assumed that a positive was just that as before this i was told prob no chemo! Thank you for your positive comment, much appriciated xx