new and scared

Hello all,
My name rachael, im 32 and live in Nottingham. Ive been to the breast clinic today for a swollen lymph node in my armpit and thickened tissue just nnear my nipple. They did an ultrasound mamogram and toom biopsies. Im so scared of the results which im going back for next Thursday. Cant stop thinking negative thoughts no mattet how hard I try! I have a 2 year old little and got it in my head I wont be around for her growing up, just awful thoughts. So glad ive found this site. I have been googling which ive now realised is the worst thing I can do1

Rachael xx

Hi Rachb. This next week will seem to stretch forever and we’ve all been through it. There are lots of younger women on here who, no doubt, will be along soon. There is also a younger women’s thread and I thinka facebook page… but someone will surely put you right on that. Googling can be dreadful although I didn’t find it so bad having a medical background. I found some interesting things (to me). This site will probably give you all the info you need for now and the support is brilliant. I found walking was good and also just trying to carry on as normal - though it’s not easy as it consumes you. I’m 4 months down the line now and finished all treatment for my particular case and i would say ‘back to normal’ as far as possible. You will be able to deal with each thing as it comes along - not looking too far into what ifs or things maybe not relating to your case/diagnosis.
Anyway, enough of me going on… do post whenever you feel like it and take care

Hi rach b, like toriaconey I agree this week will feel like it will be long. It is normal to have ’ negative thoughts ’ when you have fear you have got breast cancer. Half the battle is won once you know what it is and your treatment plan if there is one. It will seem surreal and you will experience a range of emotions which is normal. I think googling before you know might just be too scary and best to wait until you know where you are. With a two year old you must be busy so try to keep focused and busy and get some rest if possible!! . My own experience has been a bit of a roller coaster ride but the care and advice etc has been excellent. We live in a time when there is so much to offer in the way of treatments, etc. I can not fault the NHS care I have received so far. Let us know how you get on. Best wishes.

hi rach
theres nothing worse than not knowing but im afraid thats what the next week will be like. then it gets better, you will feel better when you know whats going on. in the meantime thursday seems like a long way off but we are all here for you if you need to talk or ask questions anytime.
angie x