New diagnosis during covid - waiting for results

Hello everyone,

I was diagnosed on April 1st after finding a lump on Friday 13th March. At some point in the future I’m sure I’ll find the humour in those two dates! The lump was confirmed as cancerous then a mammogram showed up lots of calcifications. Further biopsies were taken and I was initially told these were benign but unfortunately they were not. Some were pre-cancerous changes and others were already cancerous. I had a mastectomy on the 16th and a sentinel node biopsy. I was told that the cancer spread across too large an area to do a lumpectomy.

All quite a shock but I’m grateful that the surgery was able to go ahead in the current circumstances. It has been really difficult not being able to see family or friends face to face, even just to help pass the time. I am 37 and have two young children (4 and 1) so kept myself really busy by keeping them busy up to the operation date. I don’t think I’ve allowed myself to process any of this. Recovery has been steady and I’m feeling a bit stronger each day, I managed to lift my daughter yesterday for the first time which was lovely. 
My full pathology results are expected tomorrow and I’m terrified, hence the middle of the night post! I’ve been told that the next stage will be either hormone therapy or chemotherapy but at every stage I’ve been reassured of the best outcome and tried to keep positive then have been told bad news. I don’t really have a question I suppose, I just can’t sleep and could do with someone to speak to. My husband isn’t great with emotions at the best of times and it has even been hard speaking to my mum over the phone. 
Thank you x

Hi Sarah

I hope by now you’ve had your results and they are better than you anticipated. How you have managed to go through surgery with two little ones I don’t know. I take my hat off to you. I’m sorry no insomniac caught your post in time to be helpful. 

I can empathise with your pessimism - like you I went from “I don’t think we’ve anything to worry about here” to partial mastectomy to full mastectomy with radiotherapy, then widespread cancer and the full works (I hope you don’t get to that stage). What’s important right now is accepting that breast cancer is no longer something to be terrified of - recovery rates are much higher than even ten years ago and there are thousands of us here - we’ve managed it all in our own ways.

What’s also important, regardless of your results today and your treatment plan, is to take active care of your emotional health. You have a husband “not great at emotions” (me too) so you need the support of some trusted friends, people you don’t mind seeing you at your lowest and rawest should the need arise. You could also spend some time every day on whatever rocks your boat - yoga, meditation, mindfulness…I used YouTube videos by Progressive Hypnosis and Michael Sealey. You’re probably laughing and asking when??? The early hours when you can’t sleep are perfect for PH’s Manifest Healing - you’ll be asleep in minutes. It took me through chemotherapy, radiotherapy and side effects!

Do let us know your results and treatment plan. Take care,

Jan x

Hi Sarah, 

sorry only seen this message and I hope you have now Results now and your mind is at ease more and they were positive. It is very hard during the covid as feel very alone at times. I am similar age to you and had my op the day before you on 15th April and had a mastectomy and auxiliary node removal and I too have found it difficult at times as all been a whirlwind as only diagnosed 24th March but sticking to my exercises daily and finding ok and getting better each day. I have not had my results back yet due anyday soon so I’m worried as you were about the outcome. 
im so worried about what will be the next step as some have radiation and others chemo which is daunting as don’t know what to expect. Let me know how you get on as nice to know someone going through similar experience and understand hugs