new treatment plan

I’ve just written a whole page and it’s just lost it yet again. Why does this site keep doing it to me - arrghh!!!
Saw the oncologist today to get 7th gem/carbo and wanted to get the dose back upto full strength and go back 4 weekly to buy me more time. He is not happy about this and feels having smaller doses 3 weekly will make my symptoms better and also to have rads now to reduce tumour squashing my oesophagus instead of when finising gem/carbo in august. Now it means I will finish gem/carbo in mid july and didn’t want to start weekly taxol till beginning of september when children go back to school.
I’ve only ever managed 5-8 weeks without chemo and those last weeks have not had a good quality of life so a bit upset as i so wanted to be ‘well’ in my last summer with the children without weekly taxol and being bald.
Suppose I want my cake and eat it really.
At least my chest infection went with extra antibiotics and starting antihistamines again.
Said I’d keep you upto date so I’ve kept my promise!!!
Hope the rest of you are all doing OK and thanks for all your support when I told you about my chest infection and being so scared. It does help me.
Love Kate

Hi Kate,

I think we are all entitled to want our cake and eat it and I think sometimes we set things out in our minds and then our oncologists have a different idea.

I just wanted to say, Kate, that I have felt really low this week and reading your posting has given me HUGE perspective. I would say you are brave but hate it when people say that to me but just wanted to let you know how much your posting moved me and to thank you for your continual supportive emails to me when things are not the best for you right now.

Love Angee xxx

Hi Kate

I just wanted to say how uplifting your posts are to me. There was a thread about positive/negative feelings during chemo and I am sure you have seen so many before to get the gist of it. One of the arguments was that those who have secondaries may be more negative because they are more ill. Yet, from what I have read, you are one of the most upbeat, inspiring posters I have encountered. To read your posts makes me very sad, but also fills me with great joy that you are managing to live your life so well and are so grounded. Thank you.

Hi Kate

Angee says it all. You know too how much you give me HUGE perspective, and I hate hearing all that brave talk too but you girl just are.

Much love


Hi Kate,
I’m sorry you’ve been so disappointed in what you hoped for this summer. Just another example of how this %£"* disease robs us of any control, or even relatively small choices.
I really felt quite well on weekly Taxol, and my hair started to regrow, so you may be lucky and not go baldy.
Hope the rads work really well on your oesophagus so you’re much more comfortable, and sending you big hugs,
love Jacquie


I too completely agree with Angee and Jane. I read all your posts with interest and your blog too, and am amazed at your resilience, determination and courage. I know we never want to hear how brave we are etc, but you have amazing courage and I hope that I can, if/when I ever need to, be like you. I know that the kids must help you so much, as they keep you going no matter what. Mine are 4 and 18months and without them things would be different.

Sorry babbling,

Take care and lots of love

I have had two messy summers due to treatment and I know just how you feel about that. Just want some good holiday time with the children. The rads do sound a good idea to me as you should get relatively quick results from them? And hopefully they will make it much easier for you to eat LOADS of cake - and easier to eat so that you can build up some strength for taxol. Kate, there are so many of us willing you on…


Hi Kate
Just wanted to echo what has already been said, I do hope you get your good summer, I haven’t had Taxol , but hope that whatever regime it helps your quality of life , it’s not easy when there is so much that you want to pack in with your kids. Will be thinking of you
Best Wishes

Hi Kate

Just wanted to say the same as the others I know we want a big piece of cake and that is want we should be entitled to. I hope the rads help sending you lots of hugs

Beli x

Hi Kate

So sorry to hear that things have changed for you and you feel what you have planned for the summer can’t happen. It must be a huge disappointment.

Like Jacquie though, I tolerated weekly taxol quite well particularly for the first few months. It was only later on that I got real problems with my nails and felt tired - the first couple of months things were pretty normal. So maybe even if you do have to start the taxol in the summer holidays, you will still feel “well” enough to do some of the things you want with the children.

Thinking of you

Love Kay xx

Kate -I hope you get your summer with your children that you are longing for and are able to enjoy it with this new treatment plan. I kept my hair on Taxol - it grew really fast

I also hope you enjoy Shanklin and like the B & B. We loved it there and were really made to feel welcome by the owners. The breakfasts were awesome!
Looking forward to hearing all about it when you get back


Hi Kate
just got back from chemo and seen your post. I agree with everyone else.
I started taxol and avastin in Feb no probs at first but the taxol is very tiring now I am on week 12 so lets hope it wont interfere with your plans for a good summer with your children.
Have a lovely weekend.

Love Debsxxx