Hi everyone
This is my first time ever on a forum. Was diagnosed on 12th Oct with grade 3 invasive ductal bc. I’m 30, single and have no children which scares me even more I think. I started chemo last tues, have 8 cycles and then surgery. Not sure about any spread as not had other scan results yet. I’m a nurse and have been there when people have received this news but it’s the most frightening thing I’ve ever experienced. Finding it really difficult someday’s to even get my head around as I don’t feel unwell (although I did after 1st chemo- that was a wake up). Does it get easier? Does the fear ease? Everything seems so scary and long!
Just wanted to say hi and after reading some posts you all sound like a brilliant positive group of people.
lots of love
faith88
xx
Hi Faith88
Sorry to find yourself here, only positive is that we are all on the same journey and in the same boat, and it gets very choppy sometimes!
I was diagnosed on 6 October with ductal invasive carcinoma, quite a big tumour, so it is going to be reduced in size with chemo. But first I had to have a sentinal lymph node biopsy, then bone scan, then torso scan, and pre-op assessment. Tomorrow I will get my treatment plan and should start chemo a few days after. Like you, I will be having 8 chemo sessions (once every 3 weeks). Do you know why they started chemo before the results of your tests?
Yes, it does get easier, but at the same time is it like a black cloud that follows you around, and when you are first told the diagnosis you turn to jelly and feel every frightening emotion imaginable, and your mind takes you to the darkest most scary places. You will think - why me - how did it start - how long have I had it. Some much uncertainty. Somehow it does get easier, and you kind of come to terms with it, and learn to live with it. It does change your life, your way of thinking, and yearn for your ‘normal’ life with perfect boobs. I think as the days pass somehow you get stronger and start to fight back - reading all the success stories on these forums helps.
I don’t feel unwell either, sometimes tired, but that’s probably lack of rest and sleep, even though I’m signed off work at the moment, doctor suggested time out, as I’ve also got high blood pressure and diabetes :o(
The fear does ease - we all just bravely soldier on and get on with things.
Wishing you all the best with your treatment and whatever surgery you will be facing after your chemo.
Daysie x
Hi Daysie
Thanks for your comment, I think finding this forum is going to be a real help.
Doctor decided to start treatment instead of waiting for results, which in a way I’m glad about, at least I’m doing something about it instead of being stuck in limbo.
Your so right about it changing your perception of things, I know they say you should be grateful for what you have, but I think something like this really makes you aware of what you have, and the kindness of others, even people you have never meet.
Hope everything goes well with your treatment, good luck with everything. Keep in touch.
Lots of love
faith88
xx
Hi Faith, welcome from me too.
Mine was a grade 3 and I had 8 lots of chemo, so similar. It worked for me, so I was able to have a lumpectomy. Now about to start radiotherapy.
Many lovely people here to ask things of…
Ann x
Welcome Faith
I was diagnosed with a similar size and grade of tumour, underwent lumpectomy, node clearance (9/13 cancerous), mastectomy, 12 rounds of chemo, 25 rounds of rads… and here I am almost 5 years later undergoing breast reconstruction. So there is life after treatment, most definitely.
I remember waking in the mornings, have a split second where I had forgetten what had happened … and then the dreadful feeling of fear came back, so I really know where you are coming from.
It really does get easier, and the thing that helped me most (next to my dog!)was to get support from fellow patients, either on here or at one of the Breast Cancer Care events.
Take it one day at a time, just get through your chemo (do everything the nurses tell you to do!) and don’t look too far ahead, just focus on staying well through your treatment.
Lots of love
Fever
xxx
Hi Faith88
Firstly, welcome to the forums. As well as the support you are receiving from the other users you may find it helpful to have the BCC resources pack. It has been specifically designed for those newly diganosed and contains information to help you better understand your diagnosis, test results and the various treatments available. If you would like to order a copy just follow this link:-
breastcancercare.org.uk/heal … tionId/82/
Also, do give the helpline a ring if you need any further support or information. They’re on 0808 800 6000. Open 9-5 Monday to Friday and 9-2 Saturday.
Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator
Hi Faith88,
Sorry you’ve had to join this forum - but hopefully you’ll find it as useful as I have. Unfortunately there are quite a few of us in our 20s and 30s on here.
I also had 8 cycles of chemo before my surgery. I started chemo in June, finished in September, had a bilateral mastectomy in October and will be starting radiotherapy at the end of this month.
What chemo are you having and where are you being treated?
For me the fear has eased, but it still raises its ugly head every now and then! When I was diagnosed I cried lots every day. Now maybe once a fortnight and hoping that will get less as I get further into my treatment! Definitely much more giggling than weeping. And I think it’s totally natural to be scared and let it out every now and then!
I’m also very worried about the children thing. It breaks my heart thinking I might never be a mum. I’d have been a very good one… BUT trying to think positive and there are ladies on here who have gone on to have children. Just need to get over the whole BC bit first…
Why don’t you join the thread with all of the ladies who started chemo in October as there’ll be a few of them having chemo prior to surgery and it’s nice to have some virtual buddies who know exactly what you’re going through to accompany you, to sound off to, to moan to and to laugh with!
What area are you from? Is there a Haven near you? Or maybe a large hospital that have support groups for Younger Women? I went on a BCC 2-day forum and met similar aged girls and that was a real turning point for me and I’ve kept in touch with a few of them and see them regularly. It really, really helped me.
PM me if you have any questions at all.
xx