Newly diagnosed, 36, fertility concerns and unsureness

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Hello ladies,

Have been reading some threads and am finding them enormously helpful. Am now wondering if I am being too positive? I kind of got a but carried away googling things and have scared myself.

I’m 36 at end of feb i was diagnosed with stage 2 bc with one affected lymph node they could see. I had a cyst drained last year but I presumed this was the same. It was the last thing I expected. I was very calm when the consultant told me (was very surprised at how calm I was and was more worried for my husband beside me) and listened carefully to everything she said (again not like me!). She said I would need a right mastectomy and she would remove all the lymph nodes to save her going back again. I do trust my consultant and feel she knows best so this is making me feel less scared at the time…

Mastcetomy is done and not nearly as bad as I imagined. Am happy bad boob is away and am looking at recon down the line when treatment is finished. BCN showed me pics of recon and they can do amazing things now, some were very hard to spot the difference. In the meantime got myself a couple of moulded tshirt style non wired bras and popped my shoulder pad jobbie in and it looks fine until I get the prosthesis one in 6 weeks or so. That looks fine and no one would ever notice so that has helped.

Scans came back to say no spread and that is good but I suppose I’m worried that it can just pop up anywhere and grow can it? I’ve been told that’ll I’ll need chemo and I know that will be very tough but again I just feel like okay let’s get on with it. I can be very emotional at times and am wondering why I’m taking it on the chin so well. My husband is calm after an initial freak out and he has said that cancer doesn’t discriminate and has a horrible way of showing up at your door uninvited, he said it can f@&k away off because it’s not welcome at our door!!’ I do feel that I want to kick its ass and how very dare it!! I have a great hubbie and a lovely 16month baby and I want to be here.

Am waiting the pathology report about treatments etc. as I’m only 36 I had mentioned my fertility. Consultant said that I may or may not be able to have children after chemo and some people do and some people don’t have children. I didn’t want to press her on it as I thought that I may come across very selfish. Part of me is very lucky to have one I know but I do want to know more. Have read about freezing eggs but that sounds costly and you need to take oestrogen and is that dangerous for cancer, sorry I am so ignorant! Bcn said was very stretchy on the subject and I was told I should take to oncologist, would it not to be late then and don’t want to jeopardise the treatments effectiveness. Impression I was given was mast has taken the cancer out of me and the rest of this process is preventative, am not sure if I’m unstanding the gravity of the situation and should I be asking more questions.

So many helpful people on here, if anyone can help I’d appreciate your thoughts x

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Dear mulligans

Welcome to the forums. While you are waiting for other members to come along to offer support I thought the BCC publication on Fertility issues may be helpful. Here is the link:

www2.breastcancercare.org.uk/sites/default/files/bcc28_fertility_issues_web.pdf

Very best wishes

Janet
BCC Facilitator

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Hi, Why shouldn’t you be positive! You are young, have a great husband, and a baby, Have a chat with your onc and ask about freezing eggs, why not? You have a positive attitude that cancer picked the wrong gal, go and get some eggs frozen, get some arse-kicking chemo in you and recover…You have a whole life infront of you - go and live it!

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Hi Mulligans,

Good on you for being positive, my belief throughout my treatment was that I was cancer free from the day they did my first op and everything else was an insurance policy to stop it coming back.

I was 34 on diagnosis, and had some eggs frozen before chemo, although my periods have returned, so I have no reason to believe that I am not fertile again. The egg harvesting was funded by the NHS so I did not have to pay for it. I know they are reluctant to do it if you had a hormone positive tumour (mine was triple negative).

With regards to timing I had my first op on 14/09/10 and didn’t start chemo until 09/12/10 as I had a WLE followed by a recon using tissue from my back.

If you want to know more about my experience of the egg freezing (or anything else) please feel free to PM me.

Jen

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Have just seen how long my post was!! Wow i really did have a lot to get off my chest! I’m surprised you guys managed to get to the end of my short novel. Thanks horsie you made me smile, gotta get some of the arse kicking chemo in me. And squeak thanks too, really good to hear from someone who had done the egg harvesting. Had no idea if anyone had done the egg thing and that the nhs would fund it. I know everyone’s case is different and i may not qualify but I presumed you would have to fund that privately. I had a figure of 5 - 10k in my head and was thinking I’d had to find it somewhere.
Janet thanks for the leaflet. Had heard mention of it but hadn’t found it in my information pack but didn’t have it.
Thanks to to the girl who pm me. Such a great forum and so many positive helpful people on here. It really doesale it easier especially when you have a little wobble. I’ve been reading some other threads and I’ve found them enormously helpful xxxx