.
Hi Mary grace
Firstly, welcome to the forums, I am sure some of the other users will be along soon to offer you lots of support and information.
I’m sorry to read of your diagnosis, the first few days and weeks are always difficult when coming to terms with things and getting to grips with your treatment plans, etc.
I’ve given here the link to our Resource Pack for those people newly diagnosed. The pack is essential for anyone with a primary diagnosis of breast cancer. Filled with information to help you better understand your diagnosis, test results and the various treatments available.
breastcancercare.org.uk/heal … tionId/82/
Also, do give the helpline a ring if you need any further support or information. They’re on 0808 800 6000. Open 9-5 Monday to Friday and 9-2 Saturday.
I hope this is helpful.
Best wishes Sam, BCC Facilitator
Hello Mary Grace,
I’m so sorry that you’ve had to join our group but you will find lots of really helpful information here along with a huge amount of support.
Right now I expect your head is spinning as you try to come to terms with your DX. I went through all this not long ago, had a mx in November and just started chemo. It’s a huge amount to take onboard and it all seems very scary to begin with but we’ll try and help you get through it.
I would recommend that you download some of the excellent BCC information leaflets to read through and then make a list of all the questions that you want to ask your doctor about treatment. If possible take someone with you to your appointments as sometimes it’s hard to take it all in or remember everything that is said.
No question is ever too small to ask and if you don’t quite understand never be shy of asking for it all to be explained again. Also, though it’s really hard not to, I’d try not to spend too much time searching the internet as the results can be really overwhelming and scary. I made the mistake of doing that and really wished I hadn’t! 
Remember that no two patients are the same and your treatment will be tailored exactly for you, so making comparisons can be confusing.
I know you must be feeling really scared at the moment but you’ve come to the right place!
Please let us know how you are getting on and hang on in there, as sometimes the diagnosis is the hardest bit to deal with as once you’ve got that out of the way you can start to focus on the treatment and getting better.
Nymeria xx
Sorry you have had to join us but be assuured there will always be help and support from others on the site.
Obviously you are anxious about treatment having seen your mother suffer with the same disease, but be reassured the treatments have improved in leaps and bounds. I witnessed my sister going through breast cancer in the 1980’s and 90’s and then, when I had treatment in 2008, it was so much easier.
Once you start treatment you will feel more positive and ‘in charge’. Keep posting if you feel in need of support or answers to questions.
Best wishes,
AlexG
Hello, Mary Grace - thinking of you - given the time of yr posting did you sleep last night?
After my dignosis last Sept, I found varius cancer websites but took the decision not to ‘google’ in case I scared myself. A cousin in Tasmania sent me a book called:Breast Cancer - Taking Control by Prof John Boyages, who is an oncologist in Sydney. It’s distributed here by Gazelle books in the West r: ISBN no: 978-0-9806311-1-1. It arrived a coule of days before my surgery and I wish I’d had it when diagnosed. Once I began to make decisions about what was happening, even little ones, I felt better.
My suggestions would be to take someone with you and not to start taking yr clothes off until you’ve asked all the questions!
Sorry I can’t make the waiting easier.
Take care, Barbara
Hi Mary Grace,
I know how you must be feeling I was diagnosed on 3/12/10 and had WLE and SNB on 30/12/10 so am about 4 weeks on from where you are now. It is a huge amount to take in, but you will get so much support here.
I am starting to feel not ‘normal’ but functioning and am trying to not let my imagination to run riot at this stage. This is difficult as I am waiting for the results from the path lab on the lump removed last week to get the full info so they can then tell me if rads is all I’m to have next. It’s very hard to keep your mind off waiting but I put music on loud and sing loud and badly to snap myself out of it!
Keep your chin up, you will get so much support when you need it here.
Best wishes Bev x.
Love to you all x
Sorry Mary Grace can’t help re: wire and after years of depression and anti depressants to keep me on an even keel, followed by panic attacks for 9 months before diagnosis and being on whacking big dose of beta-blockers the meds are actually working!!! Lots of women seem to be using Rescue remedy but someone will know or ask your BC nurse. I watch tv in bed till late and then read really good books. Reading helps by not letting me think too hard at bedtime when can’t sleep. Don’t lie there feeling yourself pannicking do something, put head phones in and listen to music, I have even been known to get the ironing board out and clear the pile that became a mountain when i wasn’t functioning the previous 2 weeks!!! At least when you are physically as well as emotionally worn out sleep may well come. Take care, thinking of you,
Bev x
Hi Mary Grace
Like Dizzy, I am a few weeks further forward but waiting yet for those results. Mine is still earlyish - 2cm but don’t know about lymph nodes yet. I should be preparing for work tomorrow but can barely concentrate. I’m mostly busying about on other things and keeping worst-case pix at bay generally, but at times, I do what the guidelines say and set out what the worst might be. Well, it’s not tomorrow or probably any time soon. There is much well researched and funded treatment all focussed on keeping us healthy.
Friends I’ve told have all (well mostly all!) been kind and supportive. Family have been great. I hope you can lean on someone at the moment. Best of luck. (Which is what the doctor says one needs.)
Hi Mary grace.
Sorry that you are joining our elite club and yes like the others I know how it all feeels at the beginning, the info overload, the waiting and wondering, it’s an awful time for sure.
Gad you have come here for support though, and there’s plenty of that here.
Re the wire, a tiny wire is placed into your boob to mark the place where the cancerous cells are, this is done because the area is tiny(so that’s a good sign) and it helps the surgeon locate the exact area to remove the cells from accurately. The wire is put in place just before you go in for surgery, a nurse numbs the area with local anaesthetic and the wire is inserted, they do it whilst doing an ultrasound to make sure it is in the exact correct place, then they do a mammogram (one that doesn’t squash you too much tho) as another way to make sure it is in correct place. It doesn’t hurt and is gone when you come round from the op .
Hope this helps, good luck, be kind to yourself
Hugs Suze x
Hi Mary Grace, no wonder you are shocked and worried. Your reactions are 100% normal. Many of us have found that waiting is the worst part, even if the news we finally get is not good. Once you know you can make plans.
Suze has explained the wire part. Let me tell you, this is far, far worse to think about than it is to experience, and they will give you a local anaesthetic for it.
You could try one of the herb-based sleep remedies, but I am not sure that anything is very effective at a time like this. You may have noticed how many late-night postings there are here. Many of us do our best to keep busy and to concentrate on practical arrangements, which at least gives the illusion of still having some control over your life. Try to do something nice with your boys that you all enjoy. OK, I know that ‘something nice you all enjoy’ can be a challenge with teenagers.
And when you are recovering from surgery and then each stage of treatment, don’t forget to accept the help of your boys and your friends.
Thanks to everyone and have a happy day x
Marygrace, similar situation to you. Feeling a bit zonked after surgery at the mo but will PM you when I can find my head. Reckon the surgeon did an amputation from the neck up.
I found that the previously painfree lump was sore after biopsies as well, so I don’t think that’s anything to add to the worries you already have.
There are so many areas of your life that get splattered by the cancer diagnosis, it sucks.
Have a hug, and sorry you’re in this club too.
CM
x
Hello MaryGrace,
You don’t have to apologise for your feelings - any diagnosis of breast cancer iss a massive shock, no matter how big or small it turns out to be! And I agree absolutely about the consultants etc. not really understanding. Mine initially told me that they wouldn’t worry about a three week wait for an operation, which I’m sure medically is quite correct, but all I could think was “it’s alright for you to say - it isn’t growing inside you!”
I also agree with Chocciemuffin - my lump was completely painless until I’d had the biopsy, then after that I was very aware of it indeed and it definitely hurt. So I wouldn’t sorry too much about that.
Look after yourself and don’t worry about your feelings - this horrible thing turns your life upside down so much so you’re allowed to feel anything you like!
Jane xxx
Hi all,
So, Chocciemuffin maybe we share the false feeling we’ve had brain as well as breast surgery! Don’t worry about this MaryGrace but keep in touch with the forums; they can be so helpful. Didn;t have wire - had radioactive dye in the nodes and then loadsa piccies to show the surgeon where the first node was.
I took arnica and ‘anaesthetic mix’ from Ainsworth Homeopathic practice post surgery. Rescue Remedy is always in our house but I could have done with some Temazepam pre MRI scans which I loathe.
Waiting is always hard - just stick in there 'cos you can;t make time pass more quickly or the weather improve!, B
Love to you all x
Mary Grace, I to was diagnosed on the 7th and also have my Lumpectomy and Sentinel Node Biopsy on the 25th then have to wait another 2 excruciating weeks for results from this. I have been told though that because of my age I will have chemo as a prevenative measure. Whether this be 6 or 8 blocks they are not sure. I am so with you on the worrying, not sleeping. I am confused, and just need to know exactly what the diagnosis is so I can move onto the treatment and the road to recovery. Its the waiting that is the worst. I don’t know about you but from the initial Biopsy on the 29/12/10 to getting results on the 7/1/11 was the longest 10 days of my life. I think I aged at least 3 years in this time. We can all support each other and get through this together. This time next year we will be wondering what all the fuss was about (hopefully). Stay positive, keep busy and it will be our surgery day before we know it. xxx
Hi marygrace , I’m divorced, live with my 24 yr old daughter, I know what you mean about missing a cuddle. I have support from friends colleagues and children but miss a cuddle.
i’ ve already done the surgery and one chemo so getting used to this breast cancer business have had some good days in the past week, probably a better time than the waiting and wondering part at the beginning.
Best wishes to you, if it helps I didn’t get a good nights sleep. Till after surgery.
Pat
.
Mary Grace, it’s not trivial to worry about what this does to your appearance, because we are talking about parts of you. However glad a woman might be to get rid of part of her body which she can say is bad or diseased, it’s still losing a part of her body. And of course it’s not hair that has cancer, but hair is a big part of who you see yourself to be, even for the least vain. It’s a shock to look in the mirror and see a different person looking back, even when this is a style choice.
In some ways these things are tokens of our larger concerns: I was a healthy person, now I’m a sick person; will I see my children grow up; will I ever see grandchildren; will my friends/partner/children stand by me? But that doesn’t make them trivial.
It’s easy to say this to someone else, much harder to deal with it during a sleepless night or lonely evening.