Your experience strikes a chord with my own. I too found many of the tests painful, how nice it would be at the time to be forewarned! Oh yes I was so angry, bottled it all up and frequently didn’t tell anyone how I was feeling. Writing down my musings helped me no end.
At appointments my surgeon encouraged me to let the anger out and I found having my partner with me at all appointments was imperative, he heard everything and remembered so much more than me. Also at appointments asking to record conversations is a really good idea, arm yourself with any questions you want answers to.
I still struggle to answer intrusive questions from the few people I have told, my partner frequently steps in and shuts them down for me as I often can’t cope with repeating all the details myself.
I am now a year after 2 surgeries and radiotherapy and do occasionally get angry, social media can be especially triggering so I choose folks and subjects to follow carefully.
Take care, you are in my thoughts.
I was in the same position as you in Dec 23. I work at the hospital so went down during work to the breast clinic, altho unlike you in the back of my mind, i think i knew. They told me there and then and i remember saying to them but how can you be sure when biopsies will need to come back and they just looked me in the eye and said, we co this day in day out we know what cancer looks like and we are 99% sure yours is cancer. Hearing the words floored me! I then had a long wait between Christmas and New Year to find out if it would kill me. Thankfully im still here and they got it all out. HER2 Positive and lymph node metastasis.
Keep strong and remember youve got a family here and look out for local support groups.
Good luck x
I’ll be thinking of you tomorrow. The waiting really is the worst part. I had my first abnormal mammogram in 30 years last year and I knew it had to be cancer. I got an email letter from the clinic the very next day that I needed further testing. Then I had to wait a week to hear from my GP.
After getting no call back from my GP, I went to the office and I was like Shirley MacLaine in Terms of Endearment demanding some answers. Then I waited 2 weeks for the next mammogram and a week for the biopsy and another week for the appointment with the surgeon.
They tend to pat us on the head and tell us not to worry. Of course we’re going to worry! I think women are the strongest creatures on the planet. Every one of us here is a warrior. We stick together and we’re here to listen any time night or day. We’re all getting strength and compassion from each other. You’ve got this!
Oh bless you. Its perfectly normal to feel every emotion under the sun including anger. As soon as the big C word is even suggested let alone confirmed your head just goes crazy and emotions go haywire. Its coming up to nearly 2 years since I was told I have stage 4 and I still howl occasionally.
It starts with a lump or a dent. Mammogram. Scans. Biopsies . More scans. And all of a sudden everyones an expert…not…and putting their two pennys worth of advice in.
The waiting is the worst time. Hope it all goes well for you. Sending hugs
Got my results yesterday and yes it’s definitely cancer. Ductal, grade 2, ER+ & HER2-. and lymph node positive. I’m having an mri & ct scan this weekend. The surgeon thinks it will be a lumpectomy, radiotherapy & chemo, maybe chemo before surgery. They’ll give me a proper plan of action after the scans at my next appointment on 3rd March. So now I know. And yes I do feel relieved to know and have a (sort of) plan of action. Feeling calm in myself but my mind is a whirlpool of emotions and information, almost left the house without my glasses on the other day! That’s how I know I’m not really as calm as I seem, basic tasks are challenging 
I’m having a lazy day today cos I’m full of cold. Really glad we have this forum 
Glad to hear that you have your results now (obviously not at all glad that it is cancer though) and that you are feeling somewhat relieved to have answers. It really is all the emotions and so much to take in. I think there is a kind of diagnosis brain fog that tries to protect you from having to deal with it all at once. I felt weirdly calm when the pathology confirmed what they had already told me but I did have a 2am panic meltdown thinking about the reality of it all. I guess the emotions are up and down and all over the place at the start- like a whirlpool as you say!
It seems those scans are being done quickly and hopefully they have your treatment plan starting soon after your appointment in March. Rest up on your lazy day and I hope that cold passes soon.
@twinks77 so sorry to hear your diagnosis but glad there is a plan. I had exact same diagnosis and have had surgery, chemo and now waiting for radiotherapy to begin. Its all scary, a whole new world, but chemo is nowhere near as awful as the movies make out. I found it quite manageable. You seem to have had very fast diagnosis and plan put in place so it seems your hospital are really good. Take comfort in that, because I’m 15 months into my cancer experience due to a very slow hospital trust. Good luck with it all xxx
I’m so glad that you’re getting such prompt treatment and scans. I started with a small dent in late Feb 2023 and was told straightaway that the small lump causing it would be coming out and the biopsy( yes, surprisingly sore) results would determine what other treatment would be required.
3 weeks later I learned that the cancer was grade 3, highly proliferative, HER2 neutral, ER 8/8. I was fitted in for surgery April 6th, before Easter weekend. It was such a relief to think it wasn’t there any more! 2 out of 3 sentinel nodes showed spread so I was glad they went too.
Going for staging scans after that was daunting, but they did show that I had primary breast cancer.
I’ve had a lot of treatment, particularly considering no cancer has been detected in me since April 2023, but it’s to discourage return. One thing for sure is that it would be an unlucky person who got every side effect that these treatments and drugs can give rise to. The breast cancer nurse and oncology nurse can be really helpful and supportive.
Here is good too!
All the very best with your treatment now.
Cynoptimistic xx
I am in the same situation told it was non cancerous and then being told it was they just not telling me everything they removed half the Breast had a really bad infection sorted that out then was told they had found some more had lymph nodes removed now recovering from that opp and awaiting my 3 biopsy results next week and will have to take it from there. The biopsy in the clamp as I call it was so painful straight through the nipple. But let’s try and stay positive 
and keep everything crossed xxx
Hi, really interesting reading all the posts about the biopsy being painful. I was surprised mine was painful as they implied I wouldn’t feel anything beyond pushing and pulling. Now I’m thinking they just say this to keep you calm - like when midwives say childbirth isn’t “that” bad, but actually it really is!
Also can’t help but realise from reading a lot of posts that everyone seems to get their treatment plan when they get the biopsy results, where as I’ve been given no idea what my treatment plan is (biopsy results were given two weeks ago). I’m waiting for results of MRI and waiting for op date - now I’m wondering why I have no idea what they are thinking re treatment - did anyone else not get told theirs until a later stage?
How are all the ladies doing now that had their biopsies in Feb as per the early part of this post?
Xxx
Yes I agree , I think they say the biopsy won’t hurt to keep us calm because when I expressed how painful it was they didn’t seem that surprised 
I did get an idea of a treatment plan at the biopsy results appointment but it seemed to evolve or the order of treatment changed at each appointment following in that. After biopsy I had an MRi of my breasts & a CT of most of my body (neck to pelvis). I then had to have a further ultrasound on my right (good) breast but that was just cysts and an ultrasound on my thyroid, again a cyst but it will be looked at again in a few months. After all that I finally got a better idea of the plan of action. I’m having surgery on 1st April, a lumpectomy with therapeutic mammoplasty & auxiliary clearance. I have my pre op this afternoon. I think it’s been about 5 weeks since my diagnosis but it feels like months! I’m a bit nervous about surgery as I’ve never had a operation before and I’m a bit nervous about how my newer smaller left boob will look, but mostly i’ll be glad to get on with it. After that it will definitely be radiotherapy & possibly chemotherapy but the pathology results after the op will determine the decision about chemo.
Hope everyone else is doing ok xx 🩷🩷
Hope all goes well Tuesday for you. I’ve felt like everyday over the last few weeks has been about a year long, it’s so bizarre isn’t it.
I also had my biopsy in February, one from my boob and one from the lymph node. The injection for the local anaesthetic was the worst part, I didn’t feel anything from the biopsy itself. I got my results a couple of weeks later, the consultant went through my surgery options, she said that I would probably have radiotherapy and need hormone therapy as well because mine is oe+. I had a meeting with my BCN straight afterwards and she went through it all again and gave me my cancer pack which has all the information in it. She also said that I would more than likely need chemo. I didn’t get a date, but was told that it had to be done by mid April. I now have a date for the 14th April.
The consultant did say that they wouldn’t stage it or confirm a treatment plan until they’ve looked at what they’ve taken out. The waiting to find out what’s coming next is really hard. I still find it hard to believe that it’s really happening to me. I I hope you get some answers soon. I ended up ringing my BCN for confirmation of the date because i had only been given it provisionally. X