Newly diagnosed

Hi, I’m a new here. I’ve recently been diagnosed with cancer in my left breast which has spread to the lymph nodes. I’ve had CT and bone scans and I’m now waiting for an appointment with my oncologist. Unfortunately, I have had BC for some time now: I visited my GP about 18 months ago who told me it was ‘definitely’ a cyst and it was only when I went to my new GP in August to see about aspirating it, that it occurred to me that it was anything but. Thankfully, he arranged a referral to the breast clinic and in the last few weeks I’ve had the biopsies and scans and now awaiting the results.


I’ve had the difficult conversations with family and friends. The conversation with my 8 year old son was surprisingly much easier than I expected and as long as I wear a wig when I’m out I think he’ll be ok with it! I’m not sure how much my 3 year old understands but he knows I’m going to hospital for some medicine which might make me feel a bit poorly.


Anyway, that is where I’m at. I’m still deciphering the abbreviations on the posts but hopefully I’ll get there soon. J x

Hi Juma, Welcome to the forum , not a place any of us would choose to need to be a part of of course but I hope you will find support and comfort amongst the various threads ?

I know it must be hard to think that you may have had this a lot longer but to be honest most of us have had it a while before it’s detectable, a discrace that your previous GP dismissed you without further tests but sadly this happens , but it’s being dealt with now and that is what you need to try and focus on! 


Young children adapt quickly and as long as you try to keep their lives a normal as possible they will be ok, only tell them what is age appropriate , they need to know very little really at their ages. 


Any help you need with understanding the terminology please just shout,  It will soon become second nature though so don’t worry! 

Xx Jo 

Hello Juma, so sorry you find yourself here and with such a young family. I hope you will find lots of support and tips to help you through this difficult time.

I was diagnosed on the first day of the school year 3 years ago. My children were 12 and 9 at the time. My surgeon also thought that the cancer had been there for sometime as I had 2 large tumours (8cm and 2cm) plus 26 lymph nodes affected. I’ve had mastectomy, reconstruction, chemo and rads so if there’s anything you want to know please just ask.

I found school amazingly supportive, my 9 year old daughter had just moved up to middle school and only knew 2 girls in her year, but my son was in his final year so I knew many of the teachers. They were very helpful offering to look after one child if the other had after school clubs so I only had to do one pick up a day. Also giving the kids time out cards if they felt they couldn’t cope during a lesson they could leave the classroom for a breather.

Good luck with your next hospital appointment, we’re all here to support you.

hi Juma,
Nothing more to add than Jo & Dawn have said below, but sorry to hear you’re joining us, but glad you’ve found your way here.
It all is such a shock initially & it’s a bit like learning a new language, but we soon get to grips with it.
Do come & ask anything & chat or vent as you need to, there is also the helpline here if you need to talk things through.
When you start treatment there is the ‘going through treatment’ board, where you will be able to talk to others where you are & a bit further down the road.
sending hugs
ann x

Sorry that you find yourself here Juma. It is a friendly and very supportive place and I can’t recommend the going through treatment threads enough. I started chemo at the beginning of October and the September and October threads have been an invaluable source of information, support and believe it or not fun and good humour.
Try to get plenty of support lined up in advance of treatment, take any help that is offered. Your children will adapt just be open with them and give them plenty of cuddles they will be fine. One lady dealt with her hair loss by telling her children it was like the trees losing their leaves in the autumn and growing them back in the spring which I thought was lovely.
BC is very treatable it’s nit pleasant at times but make the most of the support of others and you will cope.
Best wishes for your treatment xx

Hello Juma, welcome, although I know that this is not a place most of us want or expected to be. I am at a similar stage to you in the process having been diagnosed 10 days ago and spent the last week having scans before returning to the oncologist/surgeon on Monday/Tuesday to discuss the treatment options and plan.


I am so admiring of your openness and spirit, especially when talking to your son. My children are young adults and I found anticipating talking to them the hardest part, but in reality, it was okay. They have been brilliant, although my son who is away at University worries, I think. I am sure that by being honest and factual, you’ve given your boy a gift. I read the Victoria Derbyshire book and she was similarly open with her boys who are probably around the same age. She describes how their resilience, love, adaptability and acceptance astounded her and filled her with pride.  


I really hope that you are receiving great care and can move on to the next stage of this pesky, unwelcome journey. I will be taking the path with you and thinking of you. x

Hey Juma, you have come to the right place for help, support and reassurance. Lets hope the doctor who didnt refer you wont make that mistake again!

I had cysys for several years, then last year was diagnosed with DCIS - which is non invasive. I had 2 ops and 15 lots of radiotherapy. At my yesrly mammo they found calcifications which included a small invasive breast cancer. I was gutted! I have now had 2 of 7 chemo’s. When chemo is over i will have a masectomy.

I am telling you this because each of our journeys is unique and we all deal with them in our own ways. I have been honest with my children and my 22 year old daughter said she never wanted to see me without a wig!! Now she is used to the bald me and said that thinking about it was the worst part!

Once you get your treatment plan you will feel better and more in control. Feel reassured by the fact that everyone on here has been where you are and understands just how you are feeling.

Lots of love xxc

Thst should say 12 year old daughter. Sorry fat fingers xx

I am also new to this bad dream. I was diagnosed last week after finding a lump in September and hoping it was related to my fibrocystic breast. When I didn’t go away o saw my doc. Have dcis and idc with no node involvement. Port goes in on Thursday and oncologist appt is tomorrow. So afraid of what is to come with chemo, hate the thought of losing my hair. Just a scaredy cat but through these forums I have read a lot from women receiving a/c therapy and doing quite well. Heard that women who do t have issues with morning sickness fare much better with nausea from ac therapy. It’s good to have sisters in this forum to support and be supported by. Love to all of you.

Thank you for the kind words of encouragement. I am for sure receiving chemo, I will know more detail after seeing the oncologist this afternoon. I am trying to stay positive praying hundreds of times throughout every day. All of you will be a great deal of help as I think the more we hear from others fighting the same battle the better it is for us emotionally. Sue c, I agree 100% these past few weeks have been worse than anything I can remember. The anxiety of all the tests, results and diagnoses, treatment plans and doctor appointments is horrible. I have been that person who is never sick so this is really tuff for me! Please explain what you meant Jencat by a seaband?

S Marie
This forum is a big help and will help you through treatment. Seabands are like travel sickness bands we wear on our wrists to help with nausea and sickness.xx

Emend is very effective with sickness and nauseau so ask your oncologist about this.x

I have read in several places about emend. I will definitely request this. I go Thursday for my port. I am hearing that is a fairly easy procedure would you ladies agree?

Hi s Marie , I had a port (chemo 3 years ago) it was Fantastic! I heard that lots of people didn’t get on with infusion directly into veins or picc lines but the port was so easy. A little uncomfortable for the first couple of days after it was put in. I had 14 rounds of chemo and the port meant one less thing to think about.

Thanks for the reply riversidedawn. I don’t know how many rounds I will have yet as my her2 results are still not back. If I get herceptin it will go in for a year. What is your diagnosis? I am dcis/idc grade 3 stage 2.

Yes Sue! 14 rounds - 3 x 3-weekly FEC plus 11 x weekly taxol (should have been 12 but missed one as not well enough).

S. Marie to be honest I’ve forgotten the details! It was IDC grade 3, not sure of stage but I had 2 tumours, one was 8x7cm the other 2cm (yes, cm not mm as most report!) and 26 affected lymph nodes. Guess stage 3? Anyway that was 3 years ago in September, just waiting for my annual mammogram which is due this month.

Good luck with your’s! X

Hi riversidedawn
You have given me so much inspiration as I am struggling at the mo.
I had a 6.5cm lobular tumour 6 months ago, node neg.
I worry so much about the size, although the team say the size hasn’t made much difference.
Did you’re team say much about the size of yours hun?
Rachael x

Hi Rachel, no one’s indicated that size is anything to worry about. I had a mastectomy so as far as I’m concerned the cancer was removed 3 years ago. As a belt and braces back up plan I had chemo and rads so the nasty little blighters should be long gone x

Everything happened since my diagnosis
Relationship broke up, hence lost my home, got yo start new job in a weeks time.
Most of.the time I just continually worry about recurrence and now bring on my own