Hi. I have had very poor sleep since my operation a number of months ago. I have finished my radiotherapy but i believe poor sleep is making me feel flat rather than pleased I have finished treatment. I also get quite emotional about things these days. I am grateful that treatment has finished but I somehow don’t feel much at all.
My lack of sleep is causing me to be a little forgetful and I am worried about errors with my work.
I have been told that I can see a cancer psychologist in 4 weeks time but I wondered whether seeing a private psychologist sooner might be a better option. I guess that the nhs one will have spoken to lots of people like me but, on the other hand, I guess psychologists deal with people that have the same emotions, stress, anxieties, etc
Does anyone have experience of a nhs cancer psychologist or private psychologist.
Would it be a bad idea to see a private one and also the nhs one? Thank you
Dear northerngirl,
Well done for getting this, please be kind to yourself you deserve it, cancer isn’t a walk in the park it takes a big toll on us and our bodies. We must take the best care we can give ourselves, good food, fresh air, and plenty of water.
With regards, to see a psychologist, I not sure the best way forward, NHS or private, however I don’t think you should use both ( only my opinion). Because you don’t need two people telling you differently.
Was wondering if the breast cancer nurses on this site would have some advice for you. They are extremely knowledgeable and very kind.
I do wish you well, with health and happiness ahead. Please let us know how your getting on.
Hugs Tili 
Hello
I’m so sorry to hear that you are feeling so rotten. I think what you are feeling is totally understandable and not at all unusual. Many people report having delayed trauma symptoms once active treatment is over.
From my own experience and knowledge I understand that a counsellor/psychologist shouldn’t take you on if you are already being seen by someone else for the same issue. That’s because they may contradict each other in the ways that they work and you could end up confused.
I can’t comment on which route to try - NHS or private - because i have gone privately because the waiting list at my hospital to see a counsellor was 12 weeks.
I wonder, if you want to go privately, if you could ask your BCN if they have a list of local counsellors who have cancer training. If not I think breast cancer now and Macmillan might well do.
Finally - have a look at the penny brohn website as they may well have online sessions that are of interest to you as you are going through this.
I hope you find the help you need soon. Xx
Hi jayesse
Thank you for your reply. I think I am worried about getting the right counsellor/psychologist privately compared to an nhs one who deals with cancer patients frequently. If I can’t get any info from MacMillan or Breastcancer now and choose one myself, I worry that I might miss out on the nhs one. At the end of the day I suppose all psychologists are trained to deal with issues that apply to people who have had cancer
Hello @northerngirl
If you click on the link above it will take you to the British association of counselling and psychotherapy. They have lists of all the practitioners - you can search by your area and it will tell you what they specialise in.
Xx
Hello @northerngirl
Just in case you thought you were the only one struggling - it is quite common to feel flat after treatment finishes .You and everyone else expects you will be relieved / happy / grateful dying to jump back into your life. However the truth is that while you are having treatment you have the next treatment or appointment to get through - those are your goals and you don’t think much beyond them. Then suddenly it’s all gone and you are thrust back into your life and it can be bewildering - sometimes you’re just so depleted mentally and physically and get stuck in protection mode. As well as counselling have you looked into doing the Moving Forwards course which is something that has helped a lot of us.
Are there any counselling services that you can access via your work at all ? I haven’t spoken to anyone re cancer but in 2019 I was struggling with bereavements and family problems and was referred by my OH Dept. to a Counsellor who specialised in bereavement and loss . By the time I started therapy with her I had also sustained a retinal vein occlusion which was quite debilitating and required some life adjustment and she helped me come to terms with that too as that was at least in part also a bereavement . I’m rambling a bit but my point is that a wide variety of what we think are different problems can actually boil down to much the same thing so you may not need someone who specialises completely in cancer . Cancer is sadly a very common condition so I’m sure it crops up in a lot of counselling sessions whether or not it is the intended subject of them. If you are going private it would be good to get a recommendation as has been mentioned by others.
I hope you feel better soon - it’s miserable when you can’t sleep and are tired all the time xx
I had a few sessions with a psychologist at Barts after my second operation in 2003 but I discovered years later when I sent for my notes that he had been reporting back to the cancer docs. Over the years since then I have had counselling I paid for via the British association for counselling BACP and the other association that is regulated. You can go online and choose three to visit to see if they are people you could trust. You can also stop whenever you want and go back and see them or someone else. I found there were lots where I live but it’s a quite rich area where people can afford to have counselling and pay for it. It’s about £40 a session here.
Seagulls
I tried MacMillan but got nothing out of it . They are trainee councillors in my area .
I went private for about 8 sessions . This was a few months after radiotherapy . I looked at BACP, the lady chose offered hypnotherapy and EDMR . But we never used those . it was great to talk to someone outside my family and friends but not a miracle “ cure “. . What I learnt was not to spread myself too thin , learn to say No . And that I’d been through trauma , that would never leave me, I couldn’t be the same person I was pre cancer. I’ve found going back to yoga and doing some breathing exercises every day helps me .
Have you read the Peter Harvey article ?