I recently posted on here when I found out that I had breast cancer.
After the initial shock week, and then a mini breakdown about fertility for my future, I had started to have such a positive outlook. However since having my results from my operation I don’t know what is happening to me.
The results were good in that it had not spread to the lymph nodes. However, it was made clear to me that the choice of treatment is going to be down to me. In one way I rather wish it had been out of my hands a little. I know that I should be appreciative that the cancer had not spread but I hate not knowing what to do.
I will be seeing a specialist but I haven’t received any information about when this will be. I was also supposed to be seeing a fertility specialist to discuss my options for freezing eggs and nothing has come of it.
It has been weeks of me chasing, initially once a week and each time I have been given the same excuse of ‘we know it’s being referred I will giveyou a call with an update if there is any news today’ then nothing comes of it. Last week when I called to chase up I was told that the hospital they had referred me to had not picked it up because I was out of the cachment area for them and so it’s now been picked up by another hospital that they are waiting for… still nothing each time I’ve called since it is the same. I can only say it only occured to me yesterday that I am being fobbed off.
It is now almost 2 weeks from my operation and I know that if I do choose chemotherapy I may be too late for any fertility treatment because of this. I feel like if this is the case I will refuse any treatment because I am so unwilling to risk not having children in the future.
I just feel so panicky and can’t stop crying I don’t know what is happening to me.
Did you get introduced to your BCN?? It may be worth a call to her to see if she can find out any further info for you…Do you have a good relationship with your G.P? see if they can make a few calls on your behalf
Its natural to have the feelings you are having as you feel you have a lot of decisions to make and very little info…you said you have called weekly??? It may work better if all the team involved in your care and treatment can have a meeting together??
Just hope you get the information you need to make the decision that is right for you very soon
Thanks for your response. It is my BCN that I have been calling, most times I reach a voicemail service and leave a messages, sometimes I get her. I know they are very busy so I have tried to be very patient until now. However, just over a year ago my grandmother died from what we felt was simple errors made in her care after an operation (she had an infection after her dressing was not cleaned for quite a bit during her hospital stay after an operation - she then later was taken off her antibiotics for this too early after another hospital took over her care and the infection carried over to her blood) ever since then we felt a lot of guilt that we trusted too much in the system to question and push enough for her. Now I suppose I feel like I have to push for myself but I don’t have the energy to do it right now.
I guess we all have good and bad days. I really hope that I do receive some late post today with an appointment or some news and can smack myself on the forehead for being so melodramatic!
Has anyone else had referral to a fertility specialist. How long did your referral take?
Hi Janck, it may be worth trying to get in touch with the surgeon who operated on you or the receptionist (if you havent already done so). Maybe they can try and push it for you. I hope you can get this sorted soon hun.
Love Melissa xx
why dont you ring the helpline see if they have any suggestions or just for support> They may be able to offer advice on how to deal with the system
The waiting around is awfull
Keep ringing the BCN you may get lucky and at least it will make you feel more empowered
I got referred by my bcn the day I found out I had to have chemo. Got a phone call from the fertility clinic that same day and an appointment with them the day after. So it is possible to get sorted quickly. I was lucky that my bcn was very good and there was good communication between Oncology and the fertility clinic which was at a different hospital. You shouldn’t Havre to keep chasing them but if they’re not doing it, I guess if you keep calling your bcn and leave a zillion messages for her, eventually she might realise you’re not going to go away and get something sorted for you. Good luck with it all. Al x
Just as an update I went to see the fertility clinic on Friday last week week. They told me they cannot help me as I should have been sent to a larger unit (doh! don’t I know it!!!) and that they also cannot help single women on NHS only privately.
Frustrated is not the word for what I am feeling right now.