One large breast

[laddy]

I had a uni-lateral mastectomy last year. I went for a flat closure for practical reasons. I have been left with one GG cup. I have been given a Trulife 472 size 17. This is the largest breast form Trulife make: they don’t make one in my size. It is over a KG in weight. There is no lightweight version, neither is there a swim version. There are very few bras on the market large enough, with pockets for it. I am 45, I am very active, even more so after last year. I have been relying mainly on knitted knockers for the gym but they are not practical when you get sweaty. When Boost announced they were developing Bloom, I was over the moon, and I have one of the prototypes, but not only is it too small, it does not allow my skin to breathe and I still end up soaked in sweat. Obviously that is not good for my skin. I had been dreading the summer & now it’s here it’s nothing but a misery. I had been reaching out online to various people and companies to no avail: people just don’t get it. I am in a face to face breast cancer support group too, but no one is like me. I took my breast form in to my last meeting and people were shocked. It seems that people cannot visualise until they actually see it.

I really don’t want more surgery but it seems to me that I am left with four options. 1) I muddle along as I am but as the summers get hotter I am genuinely worried about the risk of skin infections. 2) Ask for a reduction. 3) Ask for a symmetry mastectomy. 4) Stop wearing prosthetics.

Surgery is not going to be a quick fix, especially a mastectomy, because I’d need a psychological assessment and I don’t feel I should have to go through more surgery. If I carry on as I am I will eventually develop a skin infection: my Mum had one herself just before Christmas, and had to be rushed into hospital with blue lights with a temperature of 39 degrees. If I go without a prosthetic, I feel extremely self conscious (I have started doing this at home) and I am completely unbalanced, too. My posture has been affected by the surgery and I can’t even swim in a straight line. I am literally heavier on one side than the other.

Every time I reach out online I get people telling me that they are going without a prosthetic no issues and it turns out that they are several sizes smaller. The last time this happened, just this weekend, the person was 9 sizes smaller than me and could not comprehend why being a “uni boober” with a double G cup is not the same as being a “uni boober” with a C cup.

Without a prosthesis, my clothes look ridiculous and nothing fits right.

I am getting nowhere. I have given up on trying to find someone like me: I have never felt more lonely than I do right now. I have found the online community to be very toxic and there is little empathy that some of us are not flat through choice, but because of our lifestyle. I have spoken to the specialist physios, breast nurses and even written directly to Trulife: now I just want some guidance from the breast nurses: am I really the only person in the whole world with lone large breast, following a unilateral mastectomy? I feel like I am. What would be advisable for me? How on earth am I going to cope with hot weather? This is starting to have a considerable impact on my mental health right now and I don’t know how I will cope.

[pat]

Hi Laddy. I just wanted to say hello asap and reassure you that everyone here is lovely and will try and help you as much as possible.

I’m not in your situation but a friend of mine had a single mastectomy for breast cancer a few years ago. She had big breasts, I believe she was an H or an I cup and was concerned about the issues you described. She wanted to have breast reduction at the same time as her mastectomy but the surgeon refused and just ‘couldn’t see the point of doing it’ My friend got a referral to another surgeon who agreed that the disparity between her breasts wouldn’t work practically and so she had the mastectomy and the reduction, to a C/D cup, simultaneously. She felt it was the best thing she ever did.

Sorry I can’t give you any personal experience but in view of the problems you are having this seems like a possible, viable option.

Love to you

[Shi]

The lady at Nottingham city hospital is amazing and has a wide range of prosthesis and is very kind and knowledgeable, if you can phone up and see if you can see her or get your trust to refer you to Nottingham city hospital bra fitting service best to contact the lady there and see how to go about it, she has other ranges not just trulife so worth a try Shi xx

[holly.52]

Have you looked on the Flat Friends website. They have an online forum and there is often discussion about being a uniboober with a large remaining breast. https://flatfriends.org.uk/

I was an F/G cup and have had a single mastectomy without reconstruction I have an amoena NHS prosthetic. It is heavy and uncomfortable so I only tend to wear it when going out. Clothes are a nightmare but I am beginning to find things that work for me - not my usual style but doable.

I am having counselling at the moment as I am struggling with my mental health. Lots of ladies choose to have the other breast removed, probably not an option I will take and my surgeon won’t so it anyway but has offered to consider a reduction after a year.

Sending a virtual hug.

[charlottebee]

Hi @laddy
I am surprised you haven’t been offered reduction on other breast , I had mastectomy right breast had implant but had to have it removed bad infection I got used to being flat I’m 38dd when I went for check up first thing my surgeon said will do a reduction as the Prostisis is heavy especially this weather you do sweat
I like knitted knickers for swimming
Waiting for mammogram results left breast make sure no problems that side , maybe change consultants or ask for referral plastic surgeon x

[Coddfish]

So sorry you are in this position. I am a HH or J cup and had been dreading needing a mastectomy for the same reasons - plus I can’t imagine the back ache that would ensue from having just one very heavy boob. As it turned out I was able to have a lumpectomy. That’s not been a picnic either as I have extensive oedema from the radiotherapy which has made the affected boob even bigger than it was before. I also can’t wear underwires anymore because it’s too uncomfortable. If I didn’t have a load of other issues from my treatment I think I would be chasing down reduction surgery or double mastectomy- but presume I would need to go private. So not much help other than I really feel for you. I think people don’t get it unless they have lived with big boobs.

[Nurse_BCN]

Hello laddy

Thanks for your post. This sounds like a really difficult time for you.

It’s understandable that you’re frustrated about your situation and feel isolated. It’s also understandable you’re worried about problems such as skin infections and problems with posture as a consequence of struggling to manage currently.

There are many women who choose not to have reconstruction and go flat. As @holly.52 says Flat Friends offer good support to women who have had single or double mastectomy surgery without breast reconstruction, You can contact them via their website.

If you haven’t done so already, it’s important you speak to your GP, breast care nurse or treatment team in detail about how you’re feeling and the practical and physical problems you are experiencing. If you feel you’re not getting the answers you need, as @pat says, you could ask your GP to refer you for a second opinion to discuss the possible options of surgery open to you without obligation. A second opinion involves seeing another GP or specialist doctor who will give their opinion on your diagnosis or treatment.

Having a second opinion doesn’t necessarily mean that the second specialist/ treatment team will offer different treatment options or take over your care, but it can often offer information on different thoughts and approaches about how to manage a situation. If you would like the doctor who has given the second opinion to treat you, this will need to be agreed by your GP and the hospital where you had your second opinion.

There are a range of companies other than Trulife who produce both bras and prosthesis who may be able to help you. You can find general information about bras, prosthesis and clothes after surgery in our booklet, and a list of other suppliers on our website here.

Although we’re unable to recommend specific companies, we often hear from people who are experiencing difficulties with their prosthesis who found the input and support from Womanzone useful in helping with this.

You’re welcome to call our helpline if you would like to talk this through with one of our nurses in more detail . The helpline team have time to listen, talk things through and signpost you to more support and information if necessary.

As @holly.52 says, some people find that having counselling can also contribute to helping them through a difficult time. Your GP or breast care nurse may be able to refer you for some talking therapies.

Macmillan Cancer Support also provide free counselling sessions, which you may find helpful.

We offer a range of free supportive services for anyone who has had a diagnosis of breast cancer which you may be interested in. They include face to face and online courses and events.

For more details about all of these services, please see the information on the link.

Talking to someone who has had a similar experience can often be helpful. Our Someone Like Me service can match you with a trained volunteer who’s had a similar experience to you. You can be in touch with your volunteer by phone or email and they can share their personal experiences to answer your questions, offer support or simply listen to how you are feeling.

You can ring the Someone Like Me team on 0114 263 6490 or email them at someone.likeme@breastcancernow.org, so they can then match you to your volunteer.

Adapting to life after treatment can be difficult and often the need for information and support continues. Coping with the shock of a diagnosis, treatment and side effects as you’ve described, can make it difficult to readjust to everyday life again.

You may be interested in our Moving Forward resources that are for people who have had a diagnosis of primary breast cancer and have come to the end of their main hospital treatment within the last 2 years. They include our Moving Forward booklet and Moving Forward courses.

Through supportive, open conversations in a safe, confidential space, you’ll connect with people who understand. You’ll also find the tools you need to feel more empowered, confident and in control to begin to move forward with your life.

You can attend Moving Forward either at our face-to-face course or take part by joining online. Find a course near you or register for an online course via the links above or call us on 03457 077 1893.

You’re also welcome to call our helpline to talk things through. Your call will be confidential, and the number is free from UK landlines and all mobile networks. The number is 0808 800 6000, (Relay UK -prefix 18001).

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Best wishes

Addie

Breast Care Nurse

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