Absolutely terrified now. tomorrows the day. Having mastectomy without recon and dont think Im going to cope waking up with one breast. Been a total wimp about the whole thing,. Up to yesterday I still felt it was happening to someone else, now i feel my life is never going to be the same. I resent the whole thing, like most of you, I am a planner by nature and now feel things totally out of my control.
Hi
I know exactly how you feel and I felt the same way and I did not wake up any happier. I counted every last day to my so-called recon and because it has not been a good one I am now counting the days to corrective surgery. I felt mutilated from the start and I feel further mutilated since the so-called recon. Sorry but I am being honest here and some people are not so honest. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best.
Many ladies are just might pleased to be rid of their tumours - that is a valid point and one I empathise with. But surgery is just the start for some people.
Where are you having the op?
Horsemad
It’s natural to feel such angst but you could try calling the Help Line and I’m sure that they will be reassuring and have a calming effect. They are very good so please pick up the phone and just have a chat about how you are feeling, it might help.
Best wishes
D
Hi there
It’s a long time since my mx in 1993. Like most other people I dreaded it, but I do remember being rather surprised and pleased at now neat and tidy it looked, which did lift my spirits a little (I had visualised something much worse). It isn’t going to be a fun few days for you, but it may not be as bad as you think. Keep us posted.
X
S
Hi Horsemad
I felt the exact same as you describe in August this year when I had a right mastectomy. I won’t lie to you, I felt gutted and heartbroken to be missing a part of my body, but I rationalised it by telling myself that the cancer was gone and that I could go on living. I look forward to having recon in a year’s time after all treatment’s finished but will take my time over it. I’ll be thinking of you and sending love and best wishes. It’s tough but you will get through it. Post on here, call the Helpline, get as much support as you want and need. If there’s anyone who isn’t helping you or upsetting you, take a step back from them and concentrate on your needs.
Cat
Oh, Horsemad, I feel for you x. I had a mx in July and yes, I was devastated. The few days leading up to it were surreal and it did take a while to come to terms with. However, the physical pain was minimal and I hope it will be the same for you too. I started radiotherapy in September and finished 25 sessions 3 weeks ago. I went back to work on a phased return (I’m a teacher) in September and this helped my self confidence. It’s a grieving process and I urge you to give youself lots of time to heal both physically and mentally.
Wishing you all the very best. Remember, this will pass, you will smile again! Take care. Liza X
Hi Horsemad,
I empathise with you as do all the ladies on here but it is one more stage that most of us have to go through. I have a couple more tax to go then I will be in a similar position to you, then maybe I can look to you for support as you will be out the other side and hopefully healing nicely. As most of this sh.t we have to have, the worrying is the worst part because our heads always do overtime. Lots of us thinking of you tomorrow, have you packed everything that you will need. There is a thread on here listing things to take but not sure where.
will be thinking of you,
come back on when you are ready
hugs
Chris x
I am 1year post mastectomy and funnily was just thinking that it seems normal to have only one boob.I have a nice neat scar. I was in hospital for less than 24 hours and had no pain. I wish you all the best and peace of mind.xxxxxx
I wish you the strength and the courage to face this and to come through the other side safely and well,please let us know how things go. xx
Hi Horsemad,
Devastaded no. Bloody minded yes. My Mastectomy with immediate recon. and reduction to the other side was performed in August. When I look down at my breasts the view is the same, to quote my OPS "it’s all about cleavage! Hubby calls them a work in progress. Youngest daughter still nestles in for some serious cuddles. The book club girls had a good giggle over my prosthetic nipples!! I am so pleased I had immediate recon. my Mum did not and I remember the emotional time she went through.
I have never been so frightened and on the way into hospital at 06-30 I thought my chest would explode; so a few drops of Rescue remedy and a lot of attitude and here I am. You can do it and then enjoy the rest of your life.
Best wishes, OC x
Hi Dahlia. I am at Medway Hospital Kent. Dont know what their reputation is for this.
My nearest hospital 10 miles from home. I have to day the Breast care people have been so kind and cant fault them. But no one can feel what you are feeling. I cried for the first time today and am sure I will cry a lot more. This is such a cruel and random thing, no one can tell you exactly what will happen to you and whether treatment will work. A lot of peope on here seem to have reoccurrences. I am going to take a sleeping pill tonight otherwise I will be pacin g all night.
Horsemad
Will be thinking of you tonight and tomorrow. Take care
Anthi x
Hi Horsemad
ALthough Medway is my local I went to MAidstone and had mastectomy.
Good Luck
Lesley
Hi Horsemad,
I hope you are feeling better after your op. If it is any comfort at all I had a WLE and axillary clearance followed by a re-excision, I don’t feel at all confident that all the cancer has gone (10 weeks after re-excision) and wish I had insisted on a mastectomy. Remember the chance of a local recurrence is now very very low for you. I know it is traumatic (I feel the same about being bald even though it’s only temporary.) Just think, you are doing all you can to combat this awful disease. xx