I finished my chemo in early December, had radiotherapy during January and have started on Tamoxifen (about 1 month now). Is it just me or is anyone else out there paranoid about every ache and pain? Now all treatment is over I’m struggling to come to terms with what I’ve been through; if I have pains in my thighs and back I think it’s spread. I guess you never expect it to happen to you and now that it has I think it could return or spread… Please tell me this will pass, I used to be a happy go lucky person that never worried about themself and now it’s all I seem to do,
Hi Saz,
I finished my treatment last August and felt exactly the same way as you are now, I am finding however that it is starting to ease and dont automatically think every ache and pain is cancer, I do think my first mammo after diagnosis was a turning point, my anxiety levels were really high running up to my anniversary, but can honestly say the paranoia is fading, still have some dark days but they are getting further apart.
Take Care
Jill x
Hi Saz
Know how you feel. Just finished rads 2 weeks ago and have been on an emotional roller coaster ever since. I think the enormity of what I’ve been through so far has only just begun to sink in. I’m also feeling paranoid about aches and pains. I guess this is all par for the course and we’ve just got to hang in there. Sorry I don’t have any better advice but I hope it helps to know you’re not alone.
Lilac x
Nice to know I’m not alone - although sorry you feel/felt the same! BCN called yesterday to ask how I’m feeling, I mentioned that I had ache in spine for over two weeks, she says that the chemo can leave arthritic feelings but because I have reported these aches she wants me to be seen in clinic with a view to bone scan. Don’t know if I feel happy to be checked out or scared stiff. Clinic appt 9th March… lets hope I can sleep between now and then!
Posted for new user Jackie
Jo, Facilitator
Hi
I finished Radio a year ago at the end of Jan, then followed it with 9 months of Herceptin. I have finished all but Tamoxifen now, and have been on that just over a year. Last year, 2010, was a horrible depressing year, I remember feeling a bit lost and angry and sad, with some very dark days after the main lot of treatment had finished.
You could say that I’m “back to normal”, but is there such a thing? I also feel paranoid at every ache, pain and odd feeling, it’s difficult not to. My most recent paranoia is that although my periods came back, and pretty much regular too, the last two have been very late, and I’m still waiting for this one! I’m starting to worry all over again. Did anyone else experience this?
It’s hard not to be paranoid, but it’s important to seek reassurance from the consultants, that puts my mind to rest - for a while at least!
Also, haven’t had children yet, and would love to - the waiting is really testing me. I’ve been told I have to wait until I’ve had two years of Tamoxifen minimum, but I worry I can’t have them - can’t think too much about the future.
Anyway, ramblings over. 2011 so far is a much happier year for me, and I’m generally positive - which can only improve in time I guess.
Hi everyone,
I finished my radio at the end of January this year. I was so positive all through the diagnosis and treatment but am finding everything much harder now. I am worried about recurrence, but I’m also finding it harder to deal as I don’t feel I have a clear goal to aim for. At least with the treatment you could think “only two more chemo sessions” or “just one more week of radio” but now I’m two months on and still having so many problems but I can’t see when or how I will get back to “normal”, or whatever my new normal will be. I sympathise with Jackie as I am also on tamoxifen and would love to have started a family now but have to wait.
Guess we all have to keep our chins up eh?
Hi girls,
Im a bit further on than you all are, it was December 10 that I felt I could start putting it behind me after finishing chemo, MX and Rads back in July 09. I get tired a lot quicker than pre-BC and if I get really tired I get sore in my groins and under my good arm, whenever I had this, I presumed Id develped another form of cancer. I had asked my onc previously for tumour-marker blood tests but hed said no, with my vivid pessimistic imagination, Id presumed he thought theyd be high. Anyway, were living in Spain now and if you can afford it you get what you want, it cost me 200euros for TOTAL peace of mind, 4 of these blood tests plus an ultra-sound on both armpits and other breast, such a relief to get reassuring results and I just thought to myself “if I`d been given these tests in UK, my recovery would have been quicker”. So ask for these tests, I wish you all well, lots of love, Mags xx