My wife was diagnosed with grade 2 cancer just before Christmas and will be having a double mastectomy and reconstruction surgery a week on Saturday.
I’m after some practical advice on what I’m going to need to do when she comes out of hospital. The MDT have been great but don’t really give me any advice other than monitoring drains and “wait and see”.
I’d really appreciate any advice from anyone having been through this.
Just bumping this up so you will hopefully get some replies . There is also the Ask the Nurses section where you will get good advice.
@Stouffer - welcome to the forum, although I’m obviously very sorry to read about your wife’s diagnosis. However, I’m really glad you have found this forum and hope that we can help you and your wife through treatment. Please feel free to ask any questions at all, no question is too big or small and this is a safe non judgmental forum to ask for advice or support. Being the carer is tough too, so make sure you look after yourself and get support.
I had a single mastectomy with an implant reconstruction, so I am happy to share my experience if that helps. When I went home after surgery I couldn’t lift my right arm very high, and I wasn’t supposed to lift anything very heavy. So I made sure essentials like tea/coffee/chocolate were all within easy reach in the cupboards so that I could at least make a drink myself.
I would accept any help that is offered from friends or family. I don’t know who usually organises the food shopping and cooking in your house, but that is one area to look at. Maybe line up some online grocery deliveries, including some healthy food but also perhaps some nice treats to help your wife recover.
I usually organise the laundry in my house as my husband throws everything in together, on a hot wash, so means that my clothes all end up half the size and grey (I actually think he does it deliberately so I won’t ask him to do this!!). So I wrote out instructions for how I like the laundry done and he did follow them very carefully. Again I don’t know how your house is organised but this is another area to look at.
You might want to take some sort of pillow when you collect your wife as the seatbelt in the car will be uncomfortable.
Your wife will be given arm exercises to do after surgery. It is vital that she does these every day to regain mobility. You might want to help encourage her as to start with she may feel she isn’t making progress. Help her to do them “little and often” so that they don’t become a chore. If she really isn’t making progress then encourage her to ask for a physio appointment to help - or speak to her medical team for advice.
Also encourage her to start going for short walks as soon as she feels up to it.
General anaesthetics can make people feel depressed afterwards. That happened to me, but I didn’t realise this was the GA until much later. I wish I had known that the feeling would pass once the GA was out of my system.
I hope that helps to start with. Please ask if you have any more questions, and I’ll let you know if I think of any more tips. I wish your wife all the very best for treatment and her recovery, and my best wishes to you too. Evie