Post Surgery Depression

Hi All, I’ve only just joined here, mainly as I’m looking for a little help. I hope

I am posting in the right place? Let me know if there’s somewhere else I need to write. How do you pull yourself up when you are feeling down? I had my surgery on Monday, still waiting for the results and I feel flipping miserable! The last 12 months have been tough. I lost my mum, my Auntie, my cat, badly damaged my foot and my sister cut me out of her life, days after I found out my diagnosis. Finding out I have cancer is just another tragedy in the long line of tragedies! I hate the way I feel, numb and depressed, and I’d love some tips on how to get back to “me”! I know there are many people worse off than I am, but can anyone help my mental state?! Thank you. 

Sorry to hear you’ve had a tough time. I’ve been through different but similar additional problems. Had my surgery 2 weeks ago and find myself crying most days. Speaking to family and friends keeps me sane (ish). Any chance you could take the lead and contact your sister, these are hard times for everyone? x

HiI’ve recently joined too. Had my surgery 2 weeks ago and like you it’s all just hit, especially with all the other things going on in the world and personally. It’s hard isn’t it to be left with questions, wanting answers and it’s bank holiday weekend so no one is available to speak to I would normally go see my friends but obviously can’t at the moment, so the emotional support is not there. I know I can talk over the phone, but it’s not the same is it! I’ve found it helpful to give myself one job a day, whether it’s read 3 chapters of a book, complete a meditation on you tube, something I can manage that makes me feel better and takes my mind somewhere else. A friend also gave me a well-being book, called ‘grow through what you go through’. This has also helped as I write down how I’m feeling daily, but then why I may feel this way. That way I get it all out on paper, how crap this all is, my anxieties, fears, hopes, anything I am feeling. When I can, I will go to counseling, but for now I am doing 1 day at a time. I know this is my way but I hope something works for you, as it’s a lonely place to be isn’t it? Please message back if you want to chat more

Hi lollypop

First of all a big hug to you. You are are posting in the right place, but there is also another section called Moving Forward after BC and in there is a box called Coping with Fear and Anxiety. It may be worth having a look in that section too as you will find lots of helpful comments as so many people can identify with what you describe.

You’ve already had some good advice, but one thing I would add would be that general anaesthetic can make you feel really low. I didn’t realise that and didn’t understand why I felt so so down and rough after my surgeries. You have also had a lot thrown at you in a short time, it’s not surprising you feel battered. I think Nifi’s advice of one day at a time is  very good - that was some of the best advice I was given as I went through it all.

One book that I found helpful - it was recommended on here - is The Cancer Survivor’s Companion by Frances Goodhart and lucy Atkins. Might be worth a look.

If it helps to chat on here please keep doing that - it is a safe, non judgmental place. Once the current situation changes you might want to consider some counselling - or maybe you could contact the “Someone like me” support service on here?

My very best wishes to you.

Evie xx