This might seem like an odd question - but how do you answer people when they ask you about your cancer.
People ask me ‘are you cured’ are you ‘classed as a cancer patient’ questions that I find hard to answer.
All of my treatment to date ie chemo, surgery, and rads has finished last rads was the end of April.
I do not often talk about my cancer/treatment I refuse to give it air space, but when asked those questions, I am never sure what to say.
Thanks
Poppy xx
Hi Poppy,
To be honest, think most people’s questions are genuine and heartfelt. I found people were most ‘interested’ in my cancer throughout the first year. I usually responded with ‘technically not cured until 5 years clear, but consider myself cured’ and didn’t count myself as a cancer patient once the active treatment finished. As with most things in life, people’s curiosity is either satisfied or just wanes. I’m just coming up to 5 years since diagnosis and cannot remember the last time anyone asked me about it - am hoping that my appt in 2022 will be my last, will finally be able to stop the Anastrazole and be able to officially say I’m a NEDdy (No evidence (of cancer) detected). Will be ringing any bell to hand then!
Hi Poppy…I know what you mean…I just say I’ve finished chemo and rads…because biphosphonates are for another 2 years and letrozole for another 9 years…I have had primary BC 3 times now so people tend not to say much these days…those who don’t know me well don’t mention it at all…and all my close contacts know where I am up to…I guess I class myself as someone still on the cancer treadmill…although I finished chemo last December…I still WFH and this will not be reviewed by occupational health
until after my 4th ( booster) covid vaccine …so I feel ‘different to my colleagues…but am grateful to be at home as much less stress…I was assessed by Acces to work so now have voice recognition software…( due to neuropathy from chemo in my finger) …so thats a constant reminder…mostly people say to me now…’ you look well '… this …I imagine…is because I now have hair which looks doesn’t look like I’ve had chemo…and I am now 8.5 stone ( from 7.5 stone at end of chemo) …I, like you, try to give BC as little head space as possible…and am grateful when its just not mentioned anymore ( outside of my inner circle)
I think people tend to think it’s all over when you’ve finished chemo (or your last hospital-ish treatment), so they might not realise it takes things a while to get back to some kind of normal. I tend to say I’m on meds to prevent another recurrence but they think they got it all in active treatment.
And sometimes I have to remind myself that in some ways I’m still a cancer patient, and can’t expect things to be the way they were. I think it was much easier to move on the first time around, because tamoxifen was annoying but not as intense as exemestane, I didn’t have to go in for goserelin injections every month, and of course my first time around there wasn’t a pandemic!