Really worried and its probably a silly thing

I am was diagnosed with bc beginning of march and have aleady had two operations and having my third (positive margins) on 1st July. I am not really worried about any of this, and am coping well.


I have a tiny hard lump on my ear which I mentioned to the doctor a while ago and she said it was nothing to worry about. For some reason over the weekend I found I was drawn to fiddling with it, squeezed it so hard I made it really sore and and inflamed. I had to go to my gp about something else yesterday and mentioned it at the end of the consulation and that I was worried. This is a different gp to last time. He said he was sure it was nothing to worry about but I must stop squeezing it as I will end up with an infection. He is also very interested in skin conditions so does know his thing.

After being told this, why oh why do I feel sick with worry and keep googling etc. It seems totally crazy that I am not worrying about the cancer I do have, and fixating on something I probably dont have.

SGL xx

You’re in a very vulnerable place just now - you think they’ve removed it but they didn’t get clear margins (been there, done that, so know how you feel) but to be told there is another op to remove even more ‘margins’ is bound to make you uneasy. Once we’ve been touched by cancer we think every twinge, ache and pain might be it coming back for another bite. Okay - you’re right to be vigilant, but please, don’t worry unnecessarily.



seems to me that this cancer and treatment is not just a challange for our bodies but for our minds too. You read about all sorts of different ways people have reacted to the news, the treatment etc. some are totally posative and in control, some are on the floor.

Perhaps you are worried more about the whole cancer thing than you realise, but your mind would rather latch onto a safer problem. After all you know the bump in your ear is easily dealt with and quite a minor thing. But perhaps its easier for you to worry about that than the other things that are going on.

Me–currently my main concern is wether i am going to have wasted lots of money on having gels put on before next weeks surgery. Excuse me! is this realy a problem in light of what I might have to go through afterward! I think not, but perhaps my brain is happy to have something trivial to focus on rather than face the next few weeks waiting for results and possible furthur ops and treatment.

Anyway I think whatever way we handle this is ok, and it is ok for you to be worried about daft things, and it is ok for you to be worried about being worried. There are no right ways of coping, everyone does their best.

Dont beat yourself up about it. Do come on this forum and express how you are feeling, it helps me, and it seems to help others. I also find reading how other people are handling things helps me cope.

good luck on 1st July, hope they get the margins clear this time.

Thank ou alex and old and lumpy, I am trying hard to listen to what the doctor said, and believe him, but my mind has other ideas!

SGL, you’re worried, so it’s not silly.

When do you have your next appointment with an onc or surgeon? If it’s fairly soon then mention it. If it’s not for quite a while, give your BCN a ring and see if she can get you a moment to see one or other of them. They will be very happy to tell you it’s nothing to worry about, so you just go along and ask them.

Don’t feel silly about worrying. Cancer has moved ALL the goalposts, how the heck are we supposed to feel about stuff when everything has changed!

Hi choccie,

I am not seeing anyone before my surgery which is the 1st July, I do have to go to the hospital and have some blood taken before the operation, maybe I could ask if I could be seen and tie it in with that. Thats a good idea, thank you. xx

Hi SGL although it is best to check these things out for our own peace of mind. I think like most of us any little pain, bump lump spot sends us into a bit of a panic. Ive had a little lump inside my mouth for 2 years now dentist said its where I chewed it when I last see her 2 years ago. I found after my diagnosis thinking the worse of everything I had wrong that wasn’t really an issue before. pains in my shins, a strange unusual looking little spot type thing on my leg. id been having pains in my lower ribs, as my surgery date got closer I got myself in a right pickle & had wrote all these worries down one to my GP & one to my surgeon which was handed to him on the morning of my opp. At the time it was the best thing I could have done as I immediately relaxed knowing those who needed to know had this information. My GP was fantastic he had been on leave 2 weeks previous to my diag & was calling me at home whilst I was in hospital & spoke to my mum He came to see me at home 3 days after surgery & put my mind at ease over alot of my worries yet Id found just by putting it on paper & hanging it over did the trick the pains I had been having in my shins & ribs had gone & it made me realise that alot of the worries had just been magnified through being diag with this horrid BC.

I have a small lump under my chin which was a result of having a virus & nasty throat infection over 10 years ago my whole gland area was flared up & this little cyst was left when I recovered, although it was checked at hospital back then & told it was just a cyst I was offered to have it surgically removed but they wanted to cut from one side to the other which I thought was a bit drastic for a tiny lump, they only offered to remove it because of ‘cosmetic’ reasons in which case I thought the scar that would be left would be worse the surgeon agreed … I still have it & yes it plays on my mind sometimes now where before it never bothered me.
my brain now threats over it if I let it.

I think with all cancer patients we do threat over alot that maybe we wouldn’t have done before. Shame there is not one of those booklets they hand out with a guide how to ‘not’ worry & if there was could we ever really 100% relax ?

Mekala x

Thank you for your post Mekalar. You make a lot of sense.


Your welcome I hope you get to see someone before your surgery for peace of mind. If not chat with one of the staff on the ward they will see that someone talks to you

Mekala X