Hi im a 48 year old mum of two boys (well men!!! not) 23 and 26 yrs. Told on 17th may bc confirmed 24th may grade 2 with lymph involvement. So far thats all i know. Got first surgery 18th june lumpectomy and then approx 10 day wait for staging thats the scary bit, but have already been told have to have chemo, rad and prob tamoxifen. This waiting game is terrible cant even eat properly, crying then laughing. Sons getting a grip with it all now but telling them was the worst thing ever. I live with my partner and he’s trying so hard to support me but to be honest i think im getting on his nerves a bit, in fact he’s out right now for a pint!!! Since biopsy on 17th may lump feels alot bigger and aches been told by bc nurse this is normal but no one else has mentioned this. Imagination working overtime regards staging and im a bit of wreck at times. Also not too good with computers so having youngest home from unis a big help. Spent nearly allday yesterday reading froum enteries and amazed at support out there, so thanks to everyone who visits this place.
Hi Lois, I am new here as well and I do understand about the not eating - I can’t eat properly and my sleep is very intermittent!
I have had an mx and now have to have ANC about which I’m very worried - is it really necessary? So many unknown quantities, it really is frightening, isn’t it?
Yes, my lump felt bigger every time I felt it while I was waiting to be diagnosed - and after I’d had the biopsy it seemed to move around. I also had all sorts of shooting pains and aches and pains, but I think that’s quite normal.
It’s a lot to get your head round, and the waiting really is the worst thing. Good luck with your op and I hope you keep posting. There seems to be an enormous amount of support on this site! 
HI Annie thanks for reply, ive got lumpectomy and anc tomorrow i know its necessary with me as biop showed lymph involvement. For me i think surgery is the easy bit will be a relief to get IT out its just the worry of where else has it gone? what a nightmare your whole life changes in one sentence. So does everyone who loves you. I fell asleep about 10pm last night only to wake up about an hour later to find my partner (tough irish man) crying!!! I felt useless and so sad that others are suffering. Whens your ANC? All this waiting it causes more stress than the diagnosis. The surgeon told me last week that once done op do i realise that cancer all gone and chemo and rad just insurance policy but how can he know that before staging done? Im a staff nurse so imagination running way overtime. My poor mum feeling it because my dad currently halfway through 40 day course of rad for prostrate cancer feel so sorry for her too. Well its all one way to loose weight did start diet in march no need now reached target already! Feel free to keep in touch il be around all day today cos cant concentrate on much . Hope you get the op soon and try and eat i was told eat anything you fancy , easier said than done but buy goodies in and eat on a good hour. Take care x
Hello again, Lois, yes I’m sure you’ll be relieved when you’ve had your op. Then another wait for the results! It seems as though it will never end.
My ANC is on 28th June, so nearly a fortnight to wait, and of course I’m imagining the cancer cells shooting around all over my body to start up new tumours - it’s so hard to stay positive. I have CT and bone scans this Friday, all day at the hospital which I’m not looking forward to either. I’ve never had a serious illness before and it’s been such a shock.
Yes, it’s hard for our loved ones, too - I think my husband is losing weight as well in sympathy with me! I have to look after him as he suffers from COPD, so I can’t rely on him too much for physical help. Fortunately my daughter has taken time off work to come with me on Friday.
All the best for tomorrow - how long will you be in for? My hospital seems to want to keep everyone in until the drains can come out.
Annie
Dear Lois - diagnosed last week, my operation 1 July reading above - you have just described me. Silly ole moo I thought I might try to go to work today, but was greeted with my tears before I even got to th bathroom.
I wish you the very best tomorrow
Georgina.
ps Does anyone know how I can change ‘Your name’ - yup not good to do these things when you are not on the same planet 
hi annie and georgina just in from walking dog might be last walk for few days as will have drains in. Hopefully can be discharged home with them in! Thats what i was told originally but things seem to change everytime i speak to team. My first serious illness too normally im the one looking after the patient, not good being on other side. Not cried yet today feel bit numb probably cos at last tomorrows looming, be glad to get it over with. Can you go to profile and edit to change yr name im not sure cos im crap at computer things but im learning fast as this seems like lifeline at moment. I couldnt go to work after diagnosis as head in shed and i dont think they would have wanted me there like that, you need time to let shock sink in. Thanks for best wishes for tomorrow i wont be the best patient in the world cos il just want to come home when all done then the long wait again. ps I was told by bc nurse that the cells dont shoot around body as we imagine or we would all be in sooner and start treatment sooner so try and bear that im mind easier said than done i know!!! Il prob be on here later as no one else seems to understand my moods at mo, thanks again x
Hiya - have just sat in the garden, flowers lovely. Does help.
Head in a Shed, I like that one. You hit the nail on the head, I do keep thinking how far has it travelled. Can’t talk to my husband, bless him, he is just about keeping it together as well.
Can I ask what is ANC? I am not up with the lingo yet.
Georgina.
Hi everyone.
ANC means Axillary Node Clearance. the remove all the lymph nodes from beneath your armpit.
I had my MX December 12 2012. Also had a Sentinal Node Biopsy at same time (snb). Three nodes removed, one with micromets but don’t know how many. I’ve had chemo as I was grade 3, and also had vascular invasion. Now waiting to begin taking and AI (Aromatase Inhibitor) as tumour was 100% ER positive and 70% PR positive. Will be taking Anastrazole for five years. I haven’t had radiotherapy, which I was offered because of nodal involvement. But my oncologist wasn’t too happy about me having rads (neither was I) due to a lung condition. My risk of a recurrence is less than 20% in chest and 50% in lymphs. Not doing anything about that yet, but might need ANC if it comes back there.
Oh, tumour was 36mm and as I’ve said, grade 3, stage 2b. Not many hospitals tell you what stage you are. The only one to worry about really is stage 4, as that means it has spread to other parts of the body. If anyone is interested in reading about staging, this link to the Macmillan site will explain:
macmillan.org.uk/Cancerinformation/Cancertypes/Breast/Symptomsdiagnosis/Stagingandgrading.aspx
Wishing you all well. Poemsgalore xx
hi think it means axillary node clearance basically removing lymph glands. I know its preferably for them to be clear however the one they did with fine needle biopsy with me was pos for cancer too so thats why being removed. thats the worry really where has it travelled too? Wont be ages till i know that, all this waiting the worst thing its torture ! I know what you mean about talking to husband they are having their own struggles and probably trying to be strong in their own way. Once ANC done have to monitor for lymphodmema , one thing after another. Cant believe 6 weeks ago i didnt give any of this a thought how your life can change!
Must be a reason for it though we must be destined to help someone sometime! Keep your head in shed today and you might feel less shedy tomorrow x
Hi all,
Just found a glossary, but thanks for the explanation. Here I am feeling sorry for myself, you are all an inspiration to me.
Georgina
Dear Lois
Thanks, it really helps to be online with you guys. Friends and family are lovely, but they have no idea.
G.
Hi Georgina.
You are on a rollercoaster of an emotional ride and some days you will feel positve and some… well, not so positive. Your feelings are totally normal, cry if you need to, it does help to release your emotions.
I attend my local hospice every Tuesday for emotional support and get some tlc with alternative therapies, is there anything like that in your area? Your BCN will advise you if there is.
I had my WLE and a mammoplasty on the other breast 4 weeks ago, and still have my head on backwards most days. I do get a lot of support on this forum and just reading other posts helps me gain perspective.
I am seeing my oncologist for the second time tomorrow to give him my decision on chemo and plan my radiotherapy and hormone therapy.
Big hug for tomorrow Hun, let us know how you are doing when you feel up to it.
Jan x
hi g got to fight to get computer of son hes home from cardiff uni for few days but didnt fetch his bk! Other son just been and said his goodbyes before i go in tomorrow, nightmare, all packed now just want to go and get it done. Keep on looking at forums cos they have really helped me, helps to know your not the only one. Hope you have a better day tomorrow hang on in there x
Hi Lois, Georgina and anyone else in your situation. I’m a bit further down the line, waiting for chemo to start. I was kept in overnight after WLE and had a drain in for a week. I’m now 5 weeks post op (and also had ANC) and although I’m still having fluid taken off as I developed a seroma - it’s all so much better than it was. My advice is to make sure you really really rest after surgery. I tried to go back to work and ‘normal’ life and have ended up probably slowing my recovery a bit. I also went straight to the GP - got strong painkillers, some sleeping pills and a referral to a physio - all of which have helped enormously. I don’t need the pain relief or the sleeping pills anymore but I do have some excellent stretches to do!! This is such a good place to ask questions and to share fears. We all know EXACTLY how you’re feeling and here, you don’t have to pretend to be brave. I’m also in the June Jewels thread and if you have to have chemo - do pop in to ask any questions. It’s what we all did to earlier groups. Take care all of you. Hugs Cress xxx
Hey I’m 37 yrs old just got diagnosed 2 weeks ago. I’m having my lump removed 24th July, they are doing my op then as I am due to go on Holliday with may husband and kids week before then. I did ask should i just cancel the hol but they did say go away and try to enjoy cos I’ll have 6-8 months of treatment after. It’s just the whole feeling of what is it doing right now - spreading, growing etc. I have been told it is HER2 and some slight hormone. Anyone else experience of this? Due to see oncologist nxt week also to get chemo plan sorted - I am usually quite a positive person but sometimes all gets very overwhelming.
hi back from hospital lumpectomy and anc removal not too bad, bit woozy overnight and pain noisy ward but home now so can hopefully sleep tonight. Was visited today by lady bcc nurse put me touch with finished chemo nov and then surgery mx and reconstruction just got rad to go looked so well it gives you hope and her attitude is amazing. Now the long wait for staging, drains out monday and results monday after then chemo cant wait NOT!!! Somehow when your speaking to team surgeon and bcn you feel you can cope and then they go away and you have a bit of wobble, sure we are all the same though. Big relief lump gone and stretching exercises going well. Early night tonight cant wait to go to sleep, anyone waiting for op dont worry too much personally although uncomfortable bit of relief, get some good analgesia and its ok. Been advised to take it slowish and conserve energy for wound healing nice excuse for men in house to pull their weight, I read your entry gail and i agree its all sooo overwhelming but keeping occupied is lifesaver and bad days are normal, have a good holiday and try and relax abit, have a think about it everyday cos its always in your head and then get rid of thoughts for day cos it will all get treated, hang in take care x
Hiya,
Well done you. I here sending out good thoughts and wishes. Hope my op goes as well as yours. Staying positive, I’m back at work and everyone is being very supportive, although I did have a few tears - nice words seem to get to me. Thank god my boss said "I ain’t changing - I will still remain a grumpy b… " he is fantastic, just what I need now a bit of real life.
I will pop in and out of site during the day, hope you had a good nights sleep
Love Georgina.