Scared s***less

Hi all I was dx with tn last march had chemo, mx and rads. Chemo cleared my lymph nodes and shrunk the tumour and surgery go clear margins. Finished rads in dec and have felt great. Anyway about 3 weeks ago I had a Sharp pain right siabsorb abs, went into panic mode and called doc, he sent me for liver function test and ltrasound saying he was pretty sure it was a gallstone. Liver test came back clear, I went on hols feeling great came back and went for ultrasound last Friday and told I do have a gallstone, but also 2 areas of concern!! So advised to have another function test, which came back yesterday as ok. But still waiting for ct results, which I won’t get till next tues. I’m so anxious is making me feel ill, I only had a ct scan sat August and all was fine with that one…I just keep thinking…what else can cause marking on your liver, van it be the gallstone, can it be the chemo flushing out, can it be stress, or just my body taken a battering…or is I back!!! So scared right now.

Hi there Chatty Katty, I am sorry to read that you have this worry

Please do call our helpline if you feel it would help to talk things over with someone in confidence, lines are open 9-5 during the week and 10-2 Saturdays and our team are here for you

Take care

Lucy

Oh dear it seems I’m on my own here!

Sorry, think your post was missed. I’m not an expert on livers, but I know friends who have had areas of concern and been told they have fatty livers or simple cysts, so it’s not a closed case that it’s secondary spread. It’s horrible to be waiting again though, such a stressful time. Am just dashing off to do the school run now so can’t type more, but just wanted to let you know you aren’t alone xxxxxxxxxxx

Hi, sorry I don’t know any answers but just wanted to send you a big dollop of positivity - hope your results show there’s nothing to worry about…

Thanks for the responses, am trying to stay positive, but finding it so hard to think of anything else. i was only dx this time last year, just feels like ground hog day!! Just keep thinking if I hadn’t had a pain from the gallstone, I would not be in this positin now, as I feel so well! Weird

Chatty Katty
Just wanted to say you are not alone. I know of ladies having things show up on their liver which turned out to be nothing. I know its really hard but try not to worry yourself sick whilst waiting for results. Xx

Hi Chatty Katty, please dont think the worst, i have two lesions on my liver and they are just monitoring them with cts as i am going through bc chemo after rmx and anc. They don`t seemed to be overly concerned as the liver is very good a regenerating itself.
we are all here for you hun xxxxxxxx

Well I had my results on tues and I’m in total shock, I’ve been told I have 2 areas on my liver largest 8.8cm!!! F***ing hell…small amount of both lungs…my onc said areas on liver are big and need to get n with chemo, but went to marsden and they said caught it early and not too big and I can basically pick my start date!!! A bit confused.
anyway I start chemo again on Monday, starting gemcarb…it’s almost a year to the day that I started this bloodly horrific journey, I had just got off the ride and started to plan my life after bc.
Ive just come back from hols, where I’ve swam for miles, walked miles, abseiled, zip wired and actually felt normal…then bam come back to have an ultrasound and wollupe off we go again. It’s just not bloody fair.
i saw the top man in the marsden and probably won’t get invited back after my rant!
I basically went on about the professionals tell you not to bloody smoke, eat crap, be fat, be active, breast feed your kids etc and yet I still bloody got it, what about the woman sat stuffing her face with burgers, a bottle of Stella and 40 Marlborough a week…what about her…
ive got two wonderful beautiful girls 12 and 3…why don’t I get to see them grow up…I had a fantastic childhood and wanted to give my kids the same experiences and yet this bloody disease is going to rob me of the right to be a mother!!
I can’t seem to stop crying I don’t know how I’m now supposed to get on with my life. Every time I look at my kids, husband, sister and parents it makes me cry cause I don’t want to leave them cause I love them too much and I know how much its hurting them.
I’ve read the posts from other ladies with secondaries and tn and can’t believe how positive they all are, when it feels like I am wobbling on the edge of hell.
is anyone else on gemcarb? What are se like do you lose your hair?

Sending you hugs…I can only tell you about a friend of a friend of mine who had 3 brain tumours due to her BC, she had them treated and now she is well and back at work etc. Sending love and positive thoughts… Irenee xxx

Hi Chatty Katty, I’m sorry I don’t have any useful info for you - I’m new to all this. But I felt so sorry reading your post that I’ve registered just to say to you that I’m thinking of you and really hope that things go well for you. It is an awful thing you are going through. Love, M x

Chatty Katty

So sorry you have had this news. I am sure somebody in a similar postion will be along shortly to help you but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you and wishing you well with this journey. Lots of love and hugs x x

Thinking of you Katty xx