scared :-(

Hi have been lurking for a while and decided to pluck up the courage to post… i have been to see my gp today as on saturday i found a lump in my right breast, on the side towards my armpit. I do have endometriosis and pcos and my hormones are all over the place, have been crying out for help from my gp for years! She felt the lump today and has reffered me to bcc, she said they will be in contact within a few days. I am so scared, i havent slept since saturday, i am currently off work with stress and i now feel worse. My other half is rubbish with dealing with emotions :- so desperate to have a good cry but he will say i am being stupid and shoukd not be worrying. Well i am soooooo worried. I believe i am at a higher risk of breast cancer due to endo and pcos. Thanks for taking the time to read my post, i cant show my emotions because of my other half so feel like i needed to write it down. Thankyou xx

Oh no. Big, big hugs. How difficult if you’re not allowed a good cry. I had LOTS of cries at the beginning before I knew what I was dealing with. And quite a few since!! Do you have any other support? Maybe a girlfriend whose house you can go around to and have a good cry on their shoulder over a bottle of wine?

There’s not alot I can say other than to wish you luck and hope that it’s nothing bad. 85% of lumps are benign - and if you do get the worst news, most breast cancers are treatable and we will be here to support you. The helpline is also fantastic if you have some alone time when the OH is out.

Here’s hoping you get a quick referral and get the results quickly - and that the results are good news. The waiting bit is the WORST as your imagination just runs wild.

Let us know how it goes.


Thanks for your reply sandytoes x i have kept this to myself, only told my mum today, she is great and came to gp with me. But i really dont want to cry in front of her as she is 73 and dont want to worry her. Also she lost her mum dad, sister and close cousin all to cancer in the space of 7yrs, so i no she will be really worried. Your right about Your mind playing tricks, ive had some crazy thoughts going round in my head. Sounds mad i no but i cant bring myself to look at my breasts? ? Strange i no ! :- thanks again for taking the time to read and reply x x

oh hun… i did nothing but cry… of course your worried and upset… if you find a lump … even though 9/10… lumps are nothing to worry about… your life comes crashing down… and you always imagine the worst … im not sure if your at a higher risk because of other health problems… i think your higher risk if your mom sister aunt has had problems… try not to let your imagination run away with you. you have a good cry… you have lots of crys if it helps you… i couldent stop crying… well done for going rite to the doctors, your letter or phone call wont take long to come… and with lots of luck you will be just fine , big hugs … angie xx

Have a bloomin good cry and let you oh learn to deal with his inability to empathise! Sometimes a good weep is just what you need.

Best of luck for your results too.


You know so many women with no previous health or stress issues are in floods of tears 24/7 from finding their lump to getting it diagnosed. It is such a natural reaction. If you feel the need to be the same then you must give in to it. Holding it back is really bad for you, you will make yourself even more stressed out if you do not get the release.

Your mum might be more resiliant than you think, perhaps she was desperate to cry but was being brave for you. You might not have cried in front of her but I bet the worry is there on your face for all to see. Only you know how it would work, but perhaps a joint cry and a cuddle would be good for you both. She knows you have a lump, she lost so many of her family so it must be so stressfull for her whilst you wait for your results.

As to OH --there really do seem to be three sorts of men. the ones that come on here and find out how best to support their partners, or want to do the treatment for them, and are there completely for them. The absolute (nearly swore and got told off by the moderators) cads who have no compassion whatsoever, carry on as if there is nothing happening and say really cruel and thought less things, and then the decent enough ones who are just men, dont think you might need support, wouldnt cross their minds just to cuddle you and stroke your hair to make you feel better. My husband is a poppet and when I asked him he could see that I was worried, but he did not see the point himself worrrying till I got results because there was nothing he could do.

You cannot tiptoe round when he is there not crying, your emotion will come out in another way and you will probably be bitchy or moody and that will be worse for both of you. You know what his reaction will be, so next time he is not there imaging yourself crying and him doing what he would do. Dont imagine him turning into a saint. Re-inforse in your mind what his re-action will be, and so if you need to cry when he is there it will not be so hurtful that he just doing what he always does.

hopefully your appointment will come through soon. Is it a one stop clinic??? do you know what to expect on the day??? If not come back on and ask, or the helpline have got some good leaflets.

Now I hope you feel better having written it all down and read the replies. This site is a godsend whilst you are waiting for results. come on and chat at anytime.

Now off you go, get a huge box of tissues to hand and let it all hang out.

Bless you Hopex,

Please don’t take on any guilt for your feelings and reactions. It’s what makes you human.

Your OH is probably a bit lost just now, not knowing how best to support. Mine was in complete denial for 4 months (very like yours!)He only came to biopsy under duress then again for results and he completely crumbled on diagnosis. He is a star now though.

I am keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you. Crying is good for you, it’s important, it’s a safetly release valve! let it go.

Hugs xxx

Sending you a big hugg.
I cried buckets at the beginning and needed lots of reassurance.
Find somebody you can confide in and perhaps take along to the hospital with you…I didn’t take very much in and relied on those that came with me to explain it all when I got out the doctor’s room.
Lots of love to you xxxxx

Thankyou all so much for your kind words, its really helped alot. X x well hospital called this morning, i have an appointment for 13th september, on the same day that i have an appointment at the same hospital to see a orthopedic consultant to see if he is going to operate on my leg !? I cant believe how quick this is all happening, i only went to the gp yesterday. Im not sure if its a one stop clinic, its bristol breast care centre? I havent a clue what to expect and feel like im in a day dream. Any advice about what i should expect will be great? As for my oh, he is fab really, we are just trying to come to terms with my infertility and have been told ivf is the only way, lifes been tough the last few years, i have been abit of a wreck to be honest and this just seems to be another smack in the face. How many times can you be punched and get up, i feel worn out with it and finding it difficult to get back up :- thanks again to all of you for taking the time to reply, i really appreciate all of your kind words. There are alot of inspirational people on here x x

oh i have just googled it, it looks great. They have given you lots of information on the web, even given you the names of the doctors. Some hospital breast cares just have one scrappy paragraph.

Here is the page of what to expect. and believe me the biopsies do not hurt if you need one.

if they have taken this much care over the infromation on the web I am sure they are going to be a great team and will look after you and re-assure you.

Hopex,with any luck you’ll be one of the 9 out of every 10 people who find it’s not cancer.
Even if it is, the modern treatments are very effective for most people. Not a joy to live through (just had chemo, surgery and radiotherapy soon…) but it’s mostly do-able.
Hope you get some really clear answers…and good luck next week with the leg too.
Ann x