Seriously anxious

Hello Ladies
I am sorry for writing this but just wanted to speak if that makes any sense.
I found a lump on my right breast about 4 weeks ago, I never usually check but for some reason I did so have no clue how long it’s been there. Anyway, I went to the dr last week who felt the lump but didn’t say anything or give his opinion/reassurance ie it’s probably nothing but just in case. He simply referred me to the suspected cancer clinic and was told appointment in 2 weeks. This was Friday.
The GP always screws up my phone number so I’ve called the clinic and confirmed number, they don’t have the referral yet but could be in mailbox. Ive called the gp to get it resent just in case.
I’ve done my best to stay away from google and glad I’ve found this forum now.
The lump isn’t painful at all and Is hard, irregular and can only be felt when stood up or laying at 45degrees. I can’t find it when laid flat. I’m 37 and have two gorgeous boys who I want to enjoy life with and I’m stressing out.
My hubby is supportive but doesn’t have the answers I desperately need so I’m not speaking to anyone about it all.
I guess I just need to be patient and deal with whatever happens but I’m terrified.
My grandmother had Breast cancer and is fine but she wasn’t this young.
Thanks for reading and I hope you are all doing as well as you can.

Hi Nikki,

I’m sorry you have this worry and sorry that your Dr doesn’t seem to have much in the way of bedside manner! He’s referred you though which is the important thing, do keep chasing the clinic until you know they have recieved it, it will help your state of mind to do something productive. 


There is no getting away from the stress this causes but staying away from Google and keeping busy is the best thing to do, There are no answers at this stage and that is the most anxiety provoking part. 


The chances of this being breast cancer are slim, most lumps are nothing to worry about but it’s impossible not to think of the worst case scenario, I’m not going to tell you not to worry because I know how hard this is, I can tell you from experience though that no amount of worrying is going to change anything.


Try and focus on your boys and deal with things if and when you need to. I’m 3.5 years on from diagnosis and I’m doing great, life goes on after breast cancer and if you have to deal with it you will do. 


Always someone here to chat to, nothing much we haven’t been through between us so we can help with most things Xx Jo 

Hi Nikki,
You’re doing everything you can, but it’s hard not to let the anxiety gremlins bite.
As yet, it’s not possible to have any answers until you’ve been seen at the breast clinic, but the usual outcome is, it turns out to be nothing serious & if on the off chance it is bc, then the sooner it’s deal with the better.
It can help to deal with he wait by carrying on as normal, keeping busy & staying off google as you say. Worrying won’t change anything, although easier said than done of course!
Let us know how you get on.
ann x

Thank you both so much for your kind words. I’m a teacher so It doesn’t help being on half term as only have time to think.
I’m sure it’ll all be ok and the statistics show the odds are in my favour but minds are a crazy thing.
Having read a few of these posts it shows how the lack of answers is the issue. When you know, whichever way it goes, it’s easier to deal with as you know if that makes sense.
Well done for being so strong ladies, keep it up you’re awesome xx

An update but more to vent
I’m still waiting for my appointment. I chased the appointment last week as I hadn’t heard only to be told the GP hadn’t referred me correctly and I didn’t have an appointment. They had told the GP who still got it wrong despite being head of the CCG who had started the referral process scheme that they use!!!
Finally have my appointment for Wednesday but I am so stressed. Instead of enjoying my family I am stressing out at them, it’s not their fault but I’m not coping. I’m worried about Wednesday as have my appointment in the morning then parents evening, what if it’s bad news? I don’t want to give the parents a bad evening if my mind is in other places.
Sorry to ramble but my mind is spinning and I don’t know what to do anymore.

…& breathe, Nikki
As Jo says, these things happen & although it does one’s head in, it wont make any difference in the scheme of things.
It’s quite ok to feel as you do & do come & vent on here. The family will be fine, so pls don’t feel any guilt about it.
Hopefully, all will be well on Weds, it usually is, but IF you need a biopsy, then it will be another week or 2s wait for the results, so just put yourself first & do what you need to do.
ann x

Thank you Ann and Jo your words have really helped. I’ve managed to stay quite rational but yesterday I think it all got to me. I know what will be will be just hate letting others down.
Thank you and I hope you are both doing well x

I thinnk you should not worry and keep chasing the clinic or find another one if they keep ignoring your request. Stressing won’t help and you will just hurt yourself. I know It’s easy said than done but don’t stress. I wish you all the best and all the luck in the world.