Hello, I’m starting chemo soon and I’m sure intimacy will be the last thing on my mind but just incase, I wondered about chemo transfer, do people sleep separately during treatment? And if not is there a time that it’s better to avoid intimacy. I’ve read different things some saying use a barrier for the couple of days after treatment but I was actually thinking should my husband and I sleep separately or is that OTT? I’m sure we are overthinking but best to ask. TIA
The chemo nurses will advise you, I think its about 7 days afterwards but it may differ depending on which chemo you have. I do know that you definitely should use a condom.
I spent a lot of my 4 months in chemo in the spare room. Not to avoid intimacy but because of the side effects of the chemo and steroids and not sleeping from worrying. I wasnt sleeping very well and didnt want to disturb my husband, especially when he had work the next day. We both missed the closeness but I was up and down every few hours.
Talk to your breast cancer nurses and your husband. Best wishes for your chemo treatment.
Hi songbird1,
Thanks for posting.
It’s understandable that you have questions about intimacy before starting your chemotherapy.
You and your partner don’t need to sleep separately while you are having chemotherapy and you can still have sex during treatment. How you feel about intimacy during chemotherapy is different for everyone. There is no wrong or right way to feel, its important to do what works best for you. It’s good to hear that you and your partner are talking about this, and your partner may find our information about supporting someone with breast cancer helpful.
As you and @galaq mention, it’s usually recommended to use barrier contraception when having chemotherapy. It’s important not to become pregnant while on chemotherapy as the chemotherapy drugs can be harmful to a developing baby. Some people find that their periods stop during treatment, but it is still possible to become pregnant. The contraceptive pill is not usually recommended, because it contains hormones. Do talk to your breast care nurse if you have questions about which contraception methods may be most suitable for you.
You may find our information about sex and intimacy during breast cancer treatment helpful to read.
We offer a range of free supportive services for anyone who has had a diagnosis of breast cancer which you may be interested in. They include face to face and online courses and events. For more details about all of these services, please see the information on the link. You may find the chemotherapy monthly threads on our discussion forum helpful for support during your treatment.
Do call our helpline if you would like to talk this through or have any further questions. The helpline team have time to listen, talk things through and signpost you to more support and information if necessary. Your call will be confidential, and the number is free from UK landlines and all mobile networks. The number is 0808 800 6000, (Relay UK - prefix 18001).
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Best wishes
Cassie
Breast Care Nurse
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