Should have put the link regarding the recent article in. I also found the piece by A Edmondson very honest last year. There was a thread here about it at the time.
Makes me wonder how much is actually made up by the media and what has really been said. Shame the phrases “all clear” & “battle” etc are always associated with Breast Cancer.
Just wanted to say I chose my log in name when I was feeling most surreal - Alice Through the Looking Glass unwittingly finds herself in a land of Cliches (also too stupid to do an “e” with an accent). I did feel like I was on a rollercoaster only the ups were tiny scraps of hope and the downs were, well really down.
I’m looking forward to getting to the end of this treatment phase so hopefully I can live life to the full without dwelling on an uncertain future.
But wether I will say I’ve HAD BC instead of I HAVE BC I just don’t know at the moment - still seems odd to say I have it.
I just say “I’ve had breast cancer treatment and as far as we know it’s clear, but I’m being treated with hormone suppressants to try and stave a recurrence off”
What I didn’t realise really or actually fully understand before I had/have/whatever cancer is that even if they do get it all out, it hasn’t spread into the blood or the lymph nodes from what they can SEE, there can still be micro cells that are undetectable with current methods and these could have spread unnoticed, not have been caught by all teh blitzing treatment and grow.
When they say “come back” I didn’t think of it in that context, I thought it was a new cancer or they couldn’t cut it all out.
When we are gently placed into the land of NED then we are in the same place as everyone else who hasn’t been diagnosed with cancer. I personally will be placing all of this into a box labelled “the past” and taping the lid shut. I chose to live in the present - in the “now” and I intend to enjoy every minute of it.
Me too,
I had my 6 month review with the surgeon this week. All good at the moment, that’s good enough for me to move on. If anything changes in the future I’ll worry about it then.
My rads end on 23rd. December. 2012 is the start of the future for me.
2 and a half years on,i try to stay positive but when shit comes back and frightens you it really knocks you back… im struggling to get back on track again after tests etc…still waiting for results of biopsy but i am determined once they come back all clear… i will move on, be happy again…till the next time!
I vowed to move on when active treatment ended last week. I didn’t. I can’t. Not sure how. Not sure why? Depression has crept in, possitive thinking out.
Meh!
Hello again,
Its me the invisible lady who writes with invisible ink so no one will see what i’ve written and no one will comment, feels like im back at school, i was invisible there too… no matter how many times i try to fit in it just doesn’t happen.
To me it’s like climbing a mountain and you’re stuck on a rope half way up, on your own, and the shelf gave way beneath your feet. You can’t go back, you would love to get back to safety and comfort and the way forward is terrifying, but you know you have to do it. When you reach the top it will be an accomplishment that you’ll be proud of (having lost some nails and things along the way) and maybe the new life will be fulfiling but that safety and security has gone and you will never be ‘carefree/Dx free’ again.
What is also scary is the financial instability of it all. Will I HAVE to return to work halfway through this punishing regime…will that cause a recurrence. Why can’t I get DLA to give me some time to recover…I’m exhausted and a third of the way through…if I had the strength I’d be angry!
When i finish chemo, I aim to be much more positive!
Sophia, many of us feel out of place but these forums are somewhere you’ll find others who understand. Share if you want to, or just have a hug if you don’t want to.
Please don’t think of yourself of being invisible here as we are all in this together and sometimes one voice speaks for many of us. Remember that you have made a big step in adding a comment here as I reckon that they are many others who are just viewing this forum but haven’t been as brave as you in commenting. Give yourself a big pat on the back and welcome to the forum.