So much anxiety

Hey all, 

I don’t know what I’m doing but I guess I’m just sending this somewhere or putting it somewhere. I’m 32 and I was just diagnosed with IDC, grade 2, triple positive breast cancer. I have about a 2.5 cm tumor and then a few really small satellite tumors around it.
I know it’s in my lymph nodes, but my breast surgeon just didn’t really give me a lot of specifics about my imaging. She’s recommending chemo first and I’m meeting with a medical oncologist next week and getting all the scans to see if it’s somewhere else in my body. She said it’s in “at least one lymph node”, and used the word “aggressive” a lot, but that they’ve had some really promising results “even with tumors like mine”. I’m terrified. I just got married to the most perfect person. I was training for a triathlon. I feel like I’m still a child and I have no idea what I’m doing. I’m so scared thats it’s all over my body. I just want this part to be over. 

I’m so sorry you’re joining our club. It’s not a fun one but we’ve got great members and a lot of them. Breast cancer is the most common cancer for women and as a result has tons of research and money put towards it. There is so much hope regardless of stage at diagnosis.

In saying that though just because it’s in your lymph node doesn’t mean it’s all over. A lymph node is supposed to catch rogue cells after all so your’s just might be doing a good job. And yes they have to check the rest of your body with CT scans but that’s common and most of the time turns out fine. Try not to google if possible right now. It won’t help and will make things worse. One day at a time, even one minute at a time is all you should try and focus on right now if you can. And triple positive means you have a hormone fueled tumor. They have so much endocrine therapy right now and for you, you’ll even qualify for an immunotherapy targeting your HER+ hormone receptors. 

Anyway I know you’re overwhelmed and panic stricken. We all are when first diagnosed. But that feeling does fade and then you’ll be ready to face whatever comes your way. In the meantime be gentle and kind to yourself and look for things to make you feel good. If you want to vent or talk more there’s plenty of people here who know what it’s like and will be glad to support you. 

Anxiousjtt You’ve had shock of diagnosis and everything will feel like it’s happening million miles an hour with decisions you need to make while processing the diagnosis Take it one day at a time, step by step :two_women_holding_hands: keep off dr Google and trust your team they have seen it all before Do use breast cancer now younger women with cancer or there is a thread for men too, breast cancer now is here for you, do ring the number on here too and speak to a nurse if you need to You will settle into routine with everything even if it doesn’t feel like that right now, you will, step by step and day by day :two_hearts: :two_hearts: :sparkles: :sparkles: Shi xx